We Couldn't Change It If We Tried

"Blair," I said. "What's going on? What am I going to be?"

"Blair," Dani said, putting her hand on her sister's shoulder. "He has a right to know. At least your part."

"Please Blair," I said. I had to know now. Was Dani saying I was going to be an uncle? If Dani was pregnant, why was she so calm when Blair was scared to tell me? Of course I knew the answer to that. Dani was the more levelheaded one in extreme situations. On a normal basis, she was insane, but when it came down to it, she always had her head. And Blair, the usually sensible one, became hysteric in bad situations, especially when they involved her little sister.

"Dani's right. You should know," she sighed, getting up and walking into her bathroom. She came back with something in her hand. I gasped as I saw it was a pregnancy test. "Here," she handed it to me.

I took it, cautiously. Pregnant, it said. Wait. Hadn't Joseph said it was in Dani's bathroom? And wasn't it a pink plus sign? This one just said pregnant. And it was in Blair's. Then it hit me. Everything over the past few days started making sense. Blair's mood swings, her loss of appetite then sudden gain of one, her nausea. Blair was pregnant -- with my kid. I was going to be a father.

Dani waved her hand in front of my face. "Uh Kevo? You still there? Uh Blair, I think Kevin just died from shock."

"Time for you to go," Blair said, pushing her sister out of the room. "Go deal with – your own stuff."

I wouldn't speak. I couldn't get passed the fact that Blair and I had – had conceived a child. We were – going to be parents. I was going to have a baby to take care of.

"Kevin," Blair's scared voice broke through my daze.

I opened my mouth. "Wow," was all that came out.

"I know," she sighed. Her voice still sounded nervous and scared. "I'm shocked too. I never thought that – this would happen. I mean we were so careful. We used protection and everything. But I guess we weren't careful enough. And I'm really scared Kevin. I just – I don't know what to do right now. I'm so frightened, and I – I just hate this feeling. I hate being so vulnerable – so confused."

I just stared at her, unable to say anything. "Kevin," she said again, quietly. "Are you okay?"

"Blair," I said, still slightly dazed. "I don't really know right now. I mean, I don't know if I should be happy or sad, or what. On the one hand, I think we're way too young to be having a child, but on the other, I could never condone an abortion. Just – just know that I love you Blair." I kissed her. "And I'm here for you every step of the way. And even if we are young and unmarried, I know we can face this – together."

She smiled and kissed me. I slightly pushed her back on the bed, still kissing her as my hand rested on her flat-for-now stomach. "I love you too Kevin." She sighed, relieved. "I was really scared you'd be upset. I don't think I could have bared that right now, what with Dani being—" She stopped quickly, having said too much. I gasped.

"Blair," I put my hand on her cheek. "Is – is Dani pregnant too?"

"Eww," Dani said, suddenly. "This is what put you guys in this position in the first place! Geez! Now you're trying to blind me too!" She noticed Blair's apologetic look, and my questioning one. "What?"

>>><<<

Nick was sitting at the desk in our room, glaring at me. I sighed. He was probably really going to hate me forever now. First there was the drinking and now the broken vow, and pregnant girlfriend. Man, I was such a lousy older brother.

"Nick, I'm sorry okay," I said again, for what must have been the 50th time since the traitor, Kevin, left me to deal with Nick alone.

And for the 50th time, his answer was the same. "Why are you apologizing to me? You broke your vow to God, not me. You've ruined Dani's life, not mine. You've let down all your fans, not me."

"I get it," I snapped. "I messed up. But at least I'm going to step up now."

"Sure as hell you are," he mumbled.

"Besides," I said. "She might not even be pregnant."

"You still have the little thing called the broken purity vow to deal with Joseph," he rolled his eyes. "And she probably isn't. I mean it could have been Blair's." Did his tone actually sound hopefully? Nick had been acting really weird every time I said anything about my relationship with Dani. As if – as if he didn't like it. As if he was disappointed we had gotten back together.

"What is it with you and my girlfriend," I asked.

"Maybe I just think she'd be better off with someone else," he said coldly.

I stared at him, shocked, the pain of his words touching me. "Someone else like you," I asked, quietly, not sure if I wanted to know the answer. Did my brother[/b[ like my girlfriend?"

Before he could answer, the door opened and Kevin entered. Blair and Dani in tow. "Nick, out," he said.

"I already know," he rolled his eyes at Kevin. I saw as Dani's eyes flashed from mine to Nick, then back at mine.

"Nicholas, out," he said again.

"Fine," he groaned, mumbling stuff as he left.

"Dani, sit," Kevin pointed at the chair Nick had just gotten up from.

"Kevin," she started. Her voice sounded nervous. "I think I'd rather go with Nick actually."

"Danielle, sit," he ordered. She sighed dramatically, sitting. "Joseph, Danielle has something she'd like to tell you. Until then, Blair and I are going to go – to my room." He looked at her pointedly before they left.

"What was that about," I asked.

"Kevin's gone crazy," she shrugged. Neither of us said anything after that.

"So," I said. "What did you have to tell me?"

"Um," she looked away. "Uh I had to tell you about the uh – thing you found in my bathroom." She sighed. Oops, so she knew I found it. Stupid Kevin, I grunted.

"Kevin's so dead," I mumbled.

"I'll help," she murmured too.

"So – what about it?"

"Joe," she sighed again. She got out of the seat and climbed into my lap. I wrapped my arms around her waist, letting them rest lightly on her thighs.

"What is it Dani," I asked her, kissing her lightly.

She groaned. "This is so hard. Joe – I'm – I'm"

"Pregnant," I finished for her. She sighed, nodding. "How long have you known?"

"I found out today," she said. "I told Blair about our – night together. Then, because of her nausea and stuff, she made both of us take a test. And they both – well, they're." She sighed again, and smiled weakly at me. "How do you feel about becoming a father and an uncle around the same time?"

>>><<<

"Uh Joe," I waved my hand in front of his face. "Oh no! Did you die from shock too?" I sighed dramatically.

There was no hiding it anymore. I, Danielle Marie Touchstone, was pregnant. I was going to have a baby. Sure I was scared right now, but I knew I had to be calm about this. Blair was pregnant too, surprisingly. We'd gotten pregnant at the same time. Funny, right? Cause we Touchstone girls were so lucky.

"Why didn't you tell me before," he asked quietly.

I sighed. This was the question I had been dreading. I knew it would come, as it had when Kevin found out in Blair's room. And just as when Kevin had asked, I still had no definite answer. "I think – I think it was because I was scared Joe. I – I'm 18 years old. My whole life is in front of me. My whole career, my fans, everything. And," as I talked, my words started making sense to me. I started seeing truth in my words. "I knew that once you knew – it would be true. There would be no way to pretend it wasn't happening. And I – I just wanted to pretend just a little bit longer."

I looked at him, scared of his reaction. "So you made me come buy tampons with you for no reason," he smirked at me.

I grinned. "Sorry babe." Then I sighed. "Joe, I really am sorry. I did this to you. It's all my fault."

"No baby," he kissed me. "It's not your fault. It's mine for forgetting to use protection."

"But that shouldn't have matter Joe," I said. "I've been on the pill for 2 years now. It helps with shows and other celebrity and stuff. But with – with the last two months, I messed up my schedule and it – it needs to be taken right for it to work. If I hadn't been so – careless…" I looked away.

He grabbed my chin and kissed me. "Danielle, look at me. This isn't your fault. And I want you to know that no matter what; I'm going to be here for you. We're going to do this together. We can do this if we're together."

I sighed, Joe's words sounding so good. But I felt so guilty. I didn't know if I wanted to keep the baby. My career, my fans, Joe, everything, it was all too much right now for me to bring a baby into this world. But I knew ab – abo, the a word was wrong. It went against everything I believed in – everything Joe believed in. I didn't tell him any of this. Instead, I stood up. "So do you have a bullet proof vest anywhere?" He shook his head, confused. I sighed. "Damn, cause it's time to tell your family."