Welcome to Scandalous Scholastics 101

Annie's POV

Lilly happily skipped down the hallway along with Saphire whilst I trudged behind them. Saphire grimaced and pushed opened the door to the principal's office.

"Hello, ladies. Back so soon?" the secretary glanced up from his papers.

"Oh please. We're here on a personal call, Butcher." I winked.

"Whatever," He pointed to the door leading to evil, evil, EVIL, Mr. Way 's office.

Lilly smirked and pushed open the door. I burst out laughing.

"GET OFF OF ME, MIKEY!" (The Other) Mr. Way said. He pushed his brother away (who was in a place not to be mentioned) and ran his fingers through his hair.

"Erm, ladies." Mr. Mikey Way said, glaring hard at the floor as he walked out.

Mr. Gerard Way sat down and motioned us in.

"I told you there was waycest!" Saphire whispered.

We went to take seats in front of Mr. Way's desk. He had an awful lot of pictures of his little brother scattered around the room...in various poses...

We sat down. Now here comes the death stare. Ten minutes straight and you might die. That's what they say around school.

I saw Lilly pull out her watch and begin to count. At around nine minutes and fifty-nine seconds he turned to look at the picture of Mikey at the beach. In a speedo. And nice red speedo. He was doing a Little Mermaid pose where he's like lying on his stomach. Creepy.

"Do you girls know why you have been called in here?" he asked icily. We all shook our heads, innocently. "Well, neither do I. The Butcher needs to come in and tell me. Damn secretary....."

At that moment, the Butcher flounced in, whispered something to Mr. Way, and flounced out. Ugg, probably to go do his nails again or something. Come to think of it, I do believe I saw him watching 'Wheel of Fortune' before we came in. Damn secretary.

"Mr. Wentz causing trouble for you girls again?" Mr. Way sighed, rubbing his eyes. I nodded, and Saphire spoke up.

"You should really consider bringing back that Home Economics class. He seems to miss it. A lot."

"Yeah, and maybe you should do that whole fashion show thing again this year! That would be totally cool!" Lilly grinned.

"Yes, but then Mr. Saporta would pretend to be a model, like the last time. I'm sure we don't want a repeat of that incident, do we girls?" Mr. Way frowned a little, shaking his head. "It sucks to be me."

"Totally, dude." Saphire nodded, patting his arm with a sympathetic expression. He stiffened, and all our eyes widened.

"What did you just say?" he said quietly. Oh, shit. That was 'Mr. Way Expression twenty-nine'. The one where you're about to get your ass kicked. Yeah, that one.

"Uh, I totally didn't see Mikey with his hand down your-"

"NEW RULE THREE HUNDRED AND FOURTY ONE!!!! NO SURFER TALK!!! YOU'RE EXPELLED!!!" Mr. Way screamed. Ouch, my ears. I think I just went deaf.

Lilly looked stunned, Saphire looked freaked out, and I was holding my head.

"AND MIKEY DID NOT HAVE HIS HAND DOWN MY-"

My ears do still work then.

"Expelled on the first day of class? Ooooh, this has to be a new record!" The Butcher squealed, in a manly fashion of course.

"Damn secretary," Lilly mumbled. Mr. Way grumbled something, looking relatively happy again now that he had kicked someone out of his school. Saphire stood up with a blank look.

"Now that I'm no longer a student," she paused, choosing her words carefully, "can I go smoke weed on the school property?"

"Yes, yes. Fine. I'll send Mr. McCoy down to escort you out." Mr. Way was back to scrutinizing the picture of Mikey in a speedo. Okay.....

Oh, shit. Lilly and I still have class to go to.

***

3rd Period: English with Mr. Howard

***

"Lilly, shut up. Now," I hissed, trying to ignore her.

"Annie, please. He's teaching English. We all understand that." Lilly rolled her eyes and pushed her book farther away.

Mr. Howard talked in his most perfect British accent, his lips glistening with every word spilling out of his perfect mouth in the most perfect way. God, I thaought I died and went to heaven just sitting in this classroom with him.

"Annie. You're drooling." Lilly informing me, handing a tissue over, snickering behind me.

I flipped her off, but grabbed the tissue anyways. "Just in case." I scoffed.

"Antoinette," Mr. Howard grinned. "Can you tell me what t-x-t means."

"Text?" I asked.

He nodded.

"Lyke, OMG! did u here wat saphira did in mr. wentzs class?" He wrote on the board.

"What's wrong with that?" He asked.

Half the girls nodded 'nothing'.

"THAT IS CALLED LAZINESS PEOPLE! WRITE OUT THE WORD! SUCEED IN ENGLISH!" He calmed down and pointed at me.

"How would you like it if I talked like this all the time? 'Lyke OMG! Annie! Gues wat? I was like loling down the street.' that's retarded."

I blushed. He said my name! He mocked something, while using my name as an example!

"Lyke, OMG, he is so hwat.....Basically, anything with 'Lyke, OMG' or 'Lyke, OMFG' is not acceptable. If I see this on any of your papers, I will go absolutely mental. No one wants to see me go mental, believe me." Mr. Howard scribbled more on the board. " Another example: Heyy babe, ya wana go out. How would you respond, Annie?"

"Erm, Yes?" I blinked a few times.

"Well, maybe, but I would strongly recommend going out with someone with a good grasp of the English language." Mr. Howard turned back to the board, concentrating on something. Lilly sniggered, and poked me with her pencil. I tried to ignore her. Canadian bitches, they don't give up do they? What is up with Canadians anyways? They suck. Lilly sucks.

Lilly poked me harder, and I realized class had ended. There was a big 'CYA' written on the chalkboard, and I giggled. Mr. Howard has a sense of humor.

"He was totally calling on you the whole time. 'Oh, Annie, could you answer this?' or 'Oh, Annie, you always know everything!' or 'Oh, Annie please sharpen my pencil for me!'.....Hey, I don't think you'd mind sharpening his-" Lilly go smacked in the face with my folder as we hurried down the halls.

"You need to zip your lip, before I do it for you," I warned, turning towards the vending machines. "Hmm, Skittles.....And crack?! What the fuck, man? They actually did it?!"

Well, I guess they did.