Save Me

{Rainy}

It’s Friday and we’re on our way to school. The guys are talking about this weekend. Johnny’s cousin usually gets the alcohol for us. All we have to do is give him the money and a list of what we want. Jimmy pulled into a parking spot and we all got out. We waited by the car for Zacky. While we waited I saw Liz and her friends walk by. She had this smug look on her face. I wonder what that look is about.

Zack showed up about five minutes later. The five of us walked into the school and went to our lockers. After getting the needed books I closed my locker and went over to the guys. They were telling Zacky he should sleep over Johnny’s this weekend. He said he could sleep over tonight but not tomorrow cause he has to go to his aunt and uncles on Sunday with his parents. The five minute bell rand and we all went out separate ways to our first classes. Half the class was there when I entered the room. I saw Matt sitting at his desk already. He looked up at me as I walked down the isle to my seat.

As I sat down I did so slowly cause my ribs were still bothering me. I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Matt was watching me with what looked like concern on his face. He was still looking at me so I looked at him and saw the questions in his eyes. I saw Liz sit down in her seat and she started talking to Matt. I got my Science notebook out and opened it to a new page. I just sat there waiting for class to start.

“Were you able to get out of helping your parents this weekend?” I heard Liz ask Matt.

“No I’m sorry.” he said to her. She said that maybe they could go out next weekend. Matt didn’t reply to her but I saw him shrug his shoulders. Mrs. Kutch finally started the class and I was taking notes when a piece of paper landed on my desk. I picked it up and opened it.

Hey are you okay?

Is what it said. I looked over at Matt and he gave me look that said to answer. I sighed and answered the note.

I’m fine. Why?

I answered and threw the note back to him. He read it and started writing back. I looked up at the board and started to copy the notes down and I noticed Liz was glaring at me. What’s her problem? Matt threw the note back.

Cause when you sat down you did it slowly like your ribs hurt or something. And plus your lip is busted.

The note said. Why does he care? It’s not like I was gonna tell him.

Yeah well. Shit happens. Why do you give a fuck anyway?

I tossed it back to him and saw Liz shoot me another glare. Oh get a life, I thought. Is she getting mad cause Matt is writing a note with me? Aw too bad, so sad. Matt threw the note back to me and I opened it once again.

Honestly? I have no idea. But I do. I want to help you.

He wants to help me? Yeah that’s a laugh. I don’t need his help.

Well don’t. I don’t need your help. Just leave me alone.

After I tossed it back to him I turned in my seat so I was facing the window. I hope he gets the hint that I don’t want to write anymore. If not, oh well he’ll figure it out if I don’t answer. He did however get the hint cause he didn’t write back. Science went slow and I just wanted it to be over. I could feel Liz was still sending me nasty looks. Seriously, what the hell is her problem?

Finally the bell rand and I packed up my notebook and arose from my seat slowly but I moved wrong and it hurt. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Matt was again watching me. I just brushed it off and walked to the door trying to avoid getting bumped and I was successful. I walked out of the room and headed to Math class.

I sat in my seat and waited for Brian and Zacky to come in. I saw Matt walking and he was watching me while he walked to his seat. Why is he always watching me? Is he like some kind of stalker person or something? Brian and Zacky came in not long after and they headed to their seats.

“Hey Rain.” Zacky said as he sat down. I smiled at him.

“Hey. You okay?” Bri asked and I nodded. "Your ribs feel okay?” Another nod and a smile. He smiled back and him and Zacky started talking about having a band practice tomorrow or something. As they talked I just watched the people in the room. My eyes landed on Matt as he sat there watching everyone also. Maybe he isn’t so bad. Maybe if we gave him a chance. What the hell? What was I thinking that for? He’s a ‘Richie’ there’s no way we could be friends. My thoughts were interrupted when the teacher started class.

Math was boring. We just learned out of the textbook. Okay what the hell am I going to do with this geometry shit when I get out of this school? Nothing that’s what. So why should we learn about things that we’re never going to use? It’s a waste of time to me. I looked up from my book and saw Zacky and Brian both passed out. Ha Ha. I guess it’s a waste of time for them as well.

The bell rang and the boys both jumped out of their seats. I was trying not to laugh cause it was hurting my ribs, but there were some silent giggles. They both looked at me as I held my side and was giggling to myself.

“Not funny.” Brian said as he stood up.

“Yeah, just cause you can sleep through that damn bell, doesn’t mean you can laugh at us.” Zacky said. It’s true. That bell is so freaking loud it’s like an air horn but I can sleep through it and the guys can’t. We walked out of the room and Brian went off to Science as me and Zacky walked to History.

“Seriously, how the hell can you sleep through shit like that?” I shrugged. “You can sleep through anything. I remember when we set off a firecracker in your room to see if that would wake you but it didn’t. you just continued sleeping. Your like dead when you sleep.” he rambled on. I remember that firecracker thing. Well I remember them telling me about it the next day. We were like fourteen then. That was a couple months before I stopped talking.

It’s amazing how one day your life’s going okay, your friends are setting fireworks off in your room, then a few months later shit hit’s the fan. Never did I think my life would be this way with me not talking. I loved to talk. I was always talking and you could hardly get me to shut the hell up. I miss talking. I really do but I can’t talk no more. It’s like my voice left me that night, that night my life almost ended. In a way I guess you could say me life did end.

History went pretty fast with me thinking about the past. I hated to think about the past. There’s nothing but horror there. I can hardly remember the good time the guys and I had before my dad started drinking. It seems like that was a whole other life then. And in a way I guess it was a different life. Mom and dad were happy and so much in love. Brian and I had each other and three of the greatest friends. Out parents loved us to no end. Then that life died. My dad started drinking and was hardly ever home. He would always yell at us all the time. Never did he lay a finger on us though. Not even when he was drunk beyond reason. This went on for about two years before that terrible night. The night my dad snapped. The night I lost my voice.