Pop Song For Us Rejects

I loved you. I love you, and I will probably never stop. I gave you my heart and you never gave it back. I never wanted it back.

Addiction's held you back
But you don't care

Your addictions have held you back, held you hostage in your own body. The drugs and the booze have prevented you from really living. It's like you're seeing everything through glasses with the wrong prescription; you only halfway understand what's happening around you. The worst thing about it is you don't care. All you care about is the next high, the next party, the next mistake.

'Cause you're on a high again
And it's not fair

I used to live for the mistakes too, but I fixed myself and tried to fix you. It seems like you don't want 'new glasses', like you want the world to stay blurry. That's not fair to me. I'm always the one who has to pick up the pieces of you when you fall apart.

Consuming alcohol
While I gotta drive

Every time you fuck yourself up, I'm your 'designated driver'. Every night I put you back together. The only problem is the puzzle is missing pieces. Crucial pieces…

Take a hit from the drugs you stole
And try to survive

…like morals. You'll do anything to reach that high, even if it means stealing or 'turning tricks' for drugs. I remember once you disappeared into a bathroom with a dealer and came out sweaty and clutching a bag of cocaine. You're trying to survive life on an unending high, but that won't work. You need to face life soon and stop hiding behind those 'blurry glasses'.

Since your life was over
You haven't yet been sober

Ever since your parents kicked you out you haven't stopped drinking. When you're drunk, you confess things to me. You once said that you were already dead. You said your life ended the minute your father threw you out the door. That's a lie though, you have so much life left. You're letting the past hold you back.

You, you have held me back so long
Everything you do is wrong

The thing is, you've held me back too. I spend all of my time worrying about you and cleaning up your messes and looking after you and it's just so hard. But I love you so much and I'd do anything to hold you in my arms. You make so many mistakes, but you're my everything.

Your parents couldn't handle your mistakes, they told you that you were a mistake and everything you did was wrong. I learned that from one of your drunken confessions, one that took place the night before your birthday. You never told me about yourself unless you were completely wasted. That night you also told me that as a kid, your biggest wish was to own a pony. Every Christmas and every birthday you begged your parents for one. Your father told you 'only girls and queers ask for shit like that' and threatened to kick you out if you asked again. You admitted that you've never stopped wishing for one.

Later, after you'd passed out, I drove to Wal-Mart and bought you a pink My Little Pony. When I gave it to you the next day at your party, you cried. That was the first time we said 'I love you' to each other. Looking back, it seems like what we had could've lasted forever. I wish it had.

Now I gotta dump you
Continue my life too

I broke up with you. I told you that we both needed to do something else; I needed to live and you needed to be with someone who could find your missing puzzle pieces and take off those glasses and save you. You told me to move on, to never give up anything for you. Bad news, I've already given up my heart.

I tried to help you
Don't care what you do

I did everything I could to help you, but I guess I'm not your angel like you seemed to think. That was what you would call me when I deposited your inebriated body into your bed at four in the morning. You're the angel, but it seems that someone has stolen your wings. I believe his name his Vodka. I tell people that I've given up on you, that I don't care what you do, but that's a lie. I'll never give up, I love you too much.

Your state of mind's improved
But we're still apart

You've stopped taking drugs and started acting more sane, and you didn't need anyone's help. I considered trying to get back together with you, but I wanted to wait until you were completely sober. I may have to wait forever, but for you, I will.

I visited you'd moved
Don't know where to start

I was so proud that you were making an effort to change that I tried to pay you a visit. When I knocked on your door, someone else answered. You moved and didn't even tell me. I don't know how to get in touch with you. I don't even know if you remember me.

Your life's an open cold sore
Got to get out the cream

Sobering up is a catalyst; it changes every aspect of your life. Saying goodbye to alcohol is like putting medication on an infection; it instantly heals it up.

Now I'm thinking positive
But I know it's a dream

You refused to put medication on your infection. You'll never get sober. I guess I've been too optimistic when it comes to you. I can't help it, love is blind, and you're my other half. My severely shattered other half.

You died yesterday

When I got the call from Quinn, I stopped breathing. If I hadn't given you my heart, it would have stopped beating in my chest. Instead it stopped beating in your chest.

You OD'd.

They're not sure if it was suicide, but I know it wasn't. You and I made a deal that if things got too bad, we'd phone the other before doing anything drastic. You haven't called me in months.

The thought that I'll never again hear your giggle or kiss your scratchy cheeks haunts me. I bet you look beautiful even in death. You always did tend to make even the most famous models look ugly. When they bury you, they'll bury me heart too. Maybe you'll even be buried with your wings so you can fly with the other angels.

The rest of your band has asked me to sing at your funeral. I wrote you a special song. I hope you like it, I want to make all the other angels jealous of you, of course, I'm sure they already are. Just look at you, you're amazing.

You once told me that you would've disappeared without me, and I feel the same way about you. If I had never met you I'd probably be dead.

I guess I'll have to move on one day, get married, have kids, just like you told me to. I'll never love anyone like I love you though, you're my soul mate.

I loved you. I love you, and I willprobably never stop.