Back Pocket Believers

Applebee’s was crowded.

It was almost overwhelming for me, but I gritted my teeth and braved through it.

It seemed nobody was satisfied.

Me included.

I felt as though I needed a very strong drink even though I had never had one before.

It just seemed appropriate.

Don’t ask me why hordes of people decide to come to Applebee’s at 2:45 PM; I don’t have a clue.

But I didn’t complain, outwardly anyway.

Thank God I was only a hostess and not a waitress; I would have point blank quit if I was; I didn’t need another IHOP job.

So I counted my blessings (which I noticed were very few) and continued to try and calm people down and bring them to their tables.

I was weary by the time the crowd thinned down; I leaned against the wall and breathed heavily, eyes closed for a minute.

All I wanted was to go back to my apartment and sleep...

No.

That wasn’t really what I wanted; my apartment was a disaster zone and I had found a bug in the living room this morning...I wanted nothing more than to never go back there again.

Then where would I sleep?

I felt the familiar prick of tears behind my eyes and I quickly blinked.

How many times did I have to say that life sucked before I finally got used to it?

I settled on doodling on a spare napkin with some of the kids crayons during my spare time.

The bell over the door jingled, but I was in such a fowl mood that I didn’t even bother looking up to greet our next guest.

“Can I help you? I asked dully, still concentrating on the angry face I was drawing.

Next thing I know, a soft hand slowly engulfs mine.

My immediate reaction was to pull away and yell for the police, but it felt so familiar.

I looked up first, shocked, and my eyes met with those wonderful brown eyes that had always made me feel better about anything and everything.

It was Mike.

“Shayne...I need to talk to you...” He said slowly, awkwardly, but with the air of someone who knows what they want to do.

I gaped at him, hardly comprehending his words.

Mike was standing in front of me...

Mike’s hand was on mine...

It was really Mike...

“Uh...sure.” I muttered, remembering to close my mouth or risk looking like a mentally handicapped hostess.

I abandoned my post, which wasn’t too bad because nobody was waiting to be seated, and followed Mike outside.

The cool breeze was blowing and I wrapped my beat-up, old coat around myself in an attempt to stay warm.

“Listen...a lot’s been going on in the past couple of months and I was doing some thinking...” Mike began, looking off into the distance behind me.

I struggled to stay with him and not get lost in his eyes.

“Ok.” I muttered, blinking.

What could he possibly want to say to me?

It was pretty obvious how he felt about me before...could he have possibly forgiven me?

I shook my head for a split-second, throwing that thought out.

It wasn’t possible.

There was no way...

Inside, a part of me reminded myself that I couldn’t have what I want, because that’s not the way life works...I couldn’t be happy.

“Look...” Mike began again, strongly, but seemed to lose it after the word came out.

He sighed and looked anywhere but at me, searching for the right words.

I found myself hanging on to that word, him telling me to listen.

I was listening; listening carefully.

I tensed myself and looked into his eyes, catching them.

We stared at each other for a moment; I gulped and opened my mouth.

And then the words spilled out before I could help myself:

“Mike, I love you.” I said quickly, rushed.

I snapped my mouth shut immediately, clamping my hand over my face and staring, horrified, at Mike.

Mike however, looked more stunned than I felt.

His mouth nearly fell open; he clearly wasn’t expecting that at all.

Tears started to prick my eyes in embarrassment and I took a step back, cursing myself for ruining any chance I might have had.

Fuck, why did I do that? Why did I always screw things up?!

“D-Do you?” Mike stuttered, breaking into my thoughts.

I looked at him, confused.

“What?”

“D-Do you? Love me, I mean?” He asked again, a deep blush pouring into his face, much like mine.

I blinked.

“Well, yeah! Of course I do! I mean –” But I got no further because Mike rushed forward and I was suddenly engulfed in the biggest hug I had ever received, Mike’s face snuggling in the crook of my neck.

I was so surprised that I didn’t respond; just stood there like an idiot, completely shocked.

“I love you too, Shayne. And I missed you so damn much...” He said quietly, burying his hands in my hair.

His face pulled away for a moment and his eyes locked with mine.

“Please, tell me I can trust you. Because I want to so badly.” He whispered, inching closer.

My heart skipped a few beats.

I nodded; words wouldn’t come.

And then Mike crashed his lips on mine and I finally knew that everything would be ok.

Mike was mine again, and I was his, and that was all we needed.