A Sweet Disaster

My name is Shane Elizabeth Thomas. Yes, I'm aware that Shane is generally a male name. I...am what most people would call emo. If you're into that sort of thing. Labels, I mean. I think they're stupid. I depend on music much more than any one person should, but I found that I don't care. It's something I can related to. Always. I've never found a song that I can't relate something to. My favorite songs will tell you more about me than I ever will. Even if I opened up to you completely, that fact would remain true, because there are some things about me that I just can't put into words. I hate sex. In fact, I hate anything to do with it. It scares me. I hate alcohol and being drunk, but I do it all the time. I don't like the afterfeeling of a good high, but I love the initial rush. I sometimes think that I'm only different because I don't know how to fit in. As much as it may seem otherwise, I'm very concerned by what others think of me. Not my attitude or personality, but my physical appearance. Don't call me fat or ugly or anything like that, because I will take it seriously. Even if you are joking. It's one of my many flaws. I never kiss on the first date. Or the third. I'll kiss someone a month into a serious relationship, if I really like them. It takes a long time for me to trust people. I tell random people that I hardly know more about than I tell my best friend. I'm always scared that I'll say the wrong thing and they'll end up leaving me. I'm terrified of being alone, I hate commitments. I'm scared to be in love, and I hate rejection. That's about all you need to know for now.