We're Different in Every Way, but I Still Love You

Brian’s P.O.V

It’s been two weeks since she’s said anything. She won’t even look at me. Since the incident the Diana I knew has been gone. She hasn’t even spoken with our friends the only means of communication with her are yes or no questions to which she would nod or shake her head. All of our friends were worried and although they asked me want happened to her, I refused to tell the truth. Even physically she has retreated from me at all times she tries to stay as far away from me as humanly possible, which has taken its toll on me.

The few times I tried to hold her hand or to even just touch her she would pull away violently. Not to mention her emotions… or her lack of emotions are driving me insane. It’s just nothing, nothing is there it’s like she’s dead. If only……if only I hadn’t taken that deal……they did this…..it was all their fault…..

“What…kind of deal?” I asked as made himself more comfortable in his chair while I sat on the cold concrete. He smiled “well if you let me ask you a few questions I’ll let you see your mate again” he said. I sighed as I took in what he just said. I would get to see Diana again; her voice has been nothing but a bittersweet reminder of what has been missing. She has been constantly on my mind since her voice has disappeared from my mind. I worry about her with every moment I’m awake. Is she alive? Is she alright? Does she think about me as much as I think about her?

My mind was made up. If all it took to see my angel again was a few questions then they can ask away. “What do you want to ask?” I said taking the risk; after all…they could be lying to me. As soon as those words were said ‘Chris’ gave me this eerie smile as he began to ask questions. “I’ll just be asking a few small questions and then you will be rewarded” said Chris. I nodded my head indicating he could start asking away.

“X2 how do you feel about your mate?” he asked as he began writing on his note pad. This question was a no brainer. “I love her with all of my being” I said, it was as simple as that. He jotted down what I had said and continued. “Are you physically attracted to your mate?” he asked. Yet again this was something everyone could tell. Why is he asking these kinds of questions when he knows what the answer is going to be.

“Yes” I replied, I wasn’t going to give him anything other than simple answers. “If so then why haven’t you and your mate had sexual relations?” he asked as he looked up for the first time since the beginning of this interview. I sighed “my mates doesn’t want to have sex before marriage” I answered. I was starting to get a weird feeling about this interview. “From our experiments and our studies of blood mates it has shown that the male of the blood mates can not under any circumstance avoid mating with his soul mate. It is pure instinct and the natural course of things. How have you refrained from taking your mate physically?” he asked.

That was a surprise; I didn’t expect this kind of question to come up. “When you love someone you put their wants and needs before your own” I said. “So if your mate gave herself willingly, you would not object to mating with her?” asked Chris as he went back to his notes. “No I wouldn’t, as you said before its pure instinct to want to mate” I hope that was the last question. I just want to be with my love again. As if he had read my mind Chris concluded our interview. The only thing I felt was relief I would be with my other half soon enough if Chris keeps to his promise.

And unfortunately he did keep his promise. We got to see each other again but not in the way I had imagined it. At the current moment it was lights out, and everyone from what I could guess is asleep. It was late and I could feel my eyes twitching and aching for the relief of sweet slumber, but I couldn’t go to sleep. The absence of my other half has driven me to have horrible nightmares of the morning after the rape.

Yes, it was rape. I had raped the only person I had ever loved the only thing I give a damn about. I would tear out my eyes or walk on fire if she asked me to. There was nothing I could deny her. I love her so much and even though she was only a few inches away from me it felt as if she wasn’t even in this building. She was close physically but mentally and emotionally she was dead. The nights following the rape I couldn’t touch her. I was afraid to touch her. She seemed so fragile to me. I fuck things up and I don’t want to hurt her again. She laid there peacefully dreaming, probably of somewhere far away from me. I couldn’t help it as my heart twitched in pain. For the 5th night in a row I began to feel tears surface. I need her, I want her.

I slowly reached over to her arm and lightly caressed her skin with the tips of my fingers, afraid that I would hurt her again. This was the first time I had actually managed to touch her. I gently grabbed her and pulled her into my chest. Her scent consumed me and her warmth invaded my skin. She was perfect and I had lost her. I deeply breathed in her scent. Her hair surrounded me in an ocean of silky brown. I closed my eyes at the relief that flooded threw me.

It was a false sense of relief because I knew in the morning she would hate me again and flinch at the very sight of me. My mind took me to my special place. Now that her scent was within me it was easier to go to this place. It was a place where Diana and I were safe. It was a place for us. Somewhere deep in a forest was a little cottage just the right size surrounded by the beauty of nature and the peace that came along with the knowledge of being safe.

She would kiss me and hug me; we would talk for hours and then retire to our room as husband and wife. She would make love to me because she wanted to, because we belonged together. Glimpses of children appeared before they were suddenly gone. It filled me with happiness that children could one day be in our future. This felt right even though things weren’t at the moment.