Making the Album

"Psh...babies."

Rabbit smiled fondly at Tony's belly. She glared at him.

"If people don't stop treating my tummy like public property, I'm seriously going to hurt someone."

Eight months and twenty eight days later found Tony's stomach swelling to epic proportions. She'd taken to wearing t-shirts and sweatshirts while hanging around the apartment. She absolutely refused to buy any sort of maternity outfit. When she did venture out of the house, she looked amazing in custom-designed dresses that cost her next to nothing to get.

She lay back against Billie, television remote abandoned on the coffee table. She'd taken the colored streaks out of her shaggy blond hair. It fell into her eyes and around her shoulders with reckless abandon. Her current ensemble consisted of a faded Ramones t-shirt and too-big jeans with holes in the knees.

Billie leaned over and kissed her cheek. She smiled. Tre fake-vomited over the side of the couch. Jay laughed.

"Disgusting, aren't they?" He said with a grin.
"Oh, I don't know. I think they're cute." Mike replied. Jay slung his arm over Mike's shoulder and kissed him.

"Blech...too many couples here. Let's go, guys." Tre heaved himself up off the couch with a sigh.
"Where to?" Rabbit asked, stretching.
"Do you even have to ask?" Tom said with a grin.
"Heh...the usual?" Blondie pulled on his coat.
"Aw. Look at them, Bill. Off to the bar, again." Tony cooed.

Billie's brow furrowed.

"You guys, if you keep going out like this, there's a good chance you'll miss the birth."
"Ah, Bill. They wouldn't let the pack of us in there anyway." Jay clapped a hand on Billie's shoulder as he walked by. "Sides, I need to take my lady love out for dinner, it being our anniversary and all."
"Jay, what have I said about calling me that?" Mike asked irritably.
"You hate it, I know." Jay kissed him gently on the lips. "But don't worry. I plan to make it up to you."

The apartment was suddenly empty and quiet, with the exception of the television playing some bland sitcom with an overactive laugh track. Tony snuggled down into Billie's arms.

"I've been thinking on names." She said quietly.
"Oh really?" Billie looked interested. "And exactly what have you been thinking?"

Tony was quiet for a moment while she stroked her stomach.

"If it's a boy...I want to name him Barry."

Billie hugged her close, kissed the top of her head while the 'studio audience' roared at some lame comment.

"Funny...I was thinking the exact same thing." She laughed and pushed herself up off the couch.

"Now, exactly where are you off to?" Billie asked, trying to hide his worry.

The doctors had put Tony under strict orders not to strain herself. It could endanger the baby, they'd said. And they'd both taken the doctors words to heart, although their opinions differed somewhat on exactly what would be a strain.

"I'm just going to order a pizza. God, Billie, you're worse than your mother."

Mrs. Armstrong had flown in to visit for a few days. She'd been called away on some sort of family emergency, but promised to return as soon as possible. While she'd been in town, she'd deplored Billie's slender frame. She'd taken up residence in the kitchen, and alternated between pampering and scolding the men in the house. Tony had been somewhat relieved by her departure, only because the woman intimidated her to no end.

"I just don't want you hurting the baby, that's all." He called to her. Tony snorted.
"You weren't so concerned about the baby last night, when you had me on top of you completely naked and-"
"I don't want our child hearing this!"
"Our child was there for it!"
"You're a dirty woman, I don't know why I married you."
"I'm a dirty old woman? Dude, you're a dirty old man!"

They burst into giggles, which trailed off into silence. The apartment was still for a few moments, then Billie heard a sharp gasp.

"Ah...Billie...?"
"What?" Billie had leaped off the couch at the sound of her gasp, and was half-way into the kitchen.
"You might wanna call that ambulance."

***

"AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Billie had a sneaking suspicion that Tony was going to rip his hand off. Her face was red, and her knuckles where white and she was screaming her lungs out. The doctor looked terrified.

"You're doing great, Mrs. Armstrong. Now breathe."
"I am!" She snapped.

And then she began cursing in a low voice, most of which was directed at the doctor. A fact that he picked up on, judging from the vein in his forehead.

"Tony, I'm going to go call the guys, alright? Before they get too drunk?"
"Yeah...go call those motherfuckers and tell them to get their fucking asses down here right fucking now."
"I love you too."
"Don't be sarcastic. I'll get off this bed and beat the shit out of you."

Billie laughed, kissed her forehead and vanished out the door.

***

"She's having it now?"

Tre gestured for the others to shut up. Which they did almost immediately, putting down their drinks and following Tre out of the bar.

"At the hospital up on Madison...across from the library? Alright, we're sober and on our way."

He hung up the phone then turned back to the others.

"Alright. So Tony's having the baby and we need to hurry up and find Mike and get our asses down there before she's done with delivery. Okay?"

Dead silence.

"Now...where the fuck is Mike?"