‹ Prequel: The Pros and Cons of Loving
The Pros and Cons of Growing Up
Part Eighteen
Aiden’s POV
I didn’t stop throwing up instantly. It took me a few days, but from then on I always made sure no one was around. Which in itself prevented me from throwing up a lot of the time.
Daddy hadn’t told anyone. I only knew this because Dad acted no different around me. Of course with Dad feeling sick so much (I knew, though I wasn’t supposed to.), no one wanted to bother him with anything. I felt bad for Dad, and wished I knew what to say. From what I could figure out he wasn’t sick, but he was getting really bad headaches. They didn’t sound like a whole lot of fun.
I sat on the couch, my usual spot since coming home, feeling guilty. I knew that I should be doing something. I was sitting here trying to get better, and I really was, but all I was doing in reality was watching cartoons and moping.
“I’m going to the store, Aiden.” Daddy said, coming into the living room. “Why don’t you come with me and pick out some food?”
I sighed to myself and nodded, knowing if I protested it would only lead to Daddy telling me I had to eat, I was only harming myself, blah de blah. I had heard all of their arguments so many times I could predict what part they would say next.
So why wasn’t I listening?
I was trying to, but I can’t control the fact that after three bites I feel violently sick to my stomach. When you get used to not eating, you’re used to not eating. It’s simple as that.
“Let’s go, then. FRANK, AIDEN IS COMING WITH ME! I LOVE YOU! BYE!” Daddy called up the stairs.
“LOVE YOU BOTH! BE CAREFUL!” Dad replied. It was hard to tell which of my fathers was louder.
I went on out to the car, climbing into the passenger seat. I hadn’t driven in so long, I probably would have to learn again. There had been no need for it in New York and here all I had done is mope inside.
I realize how lazy and selfish this sounds, but I can’t seem to stop.
“Aiden, you drive. I’m tired.” Daddy said.
“I don’t want to drive. My license is probably expired.” I said stubbornly.
“No, its not. I’m sick of you doing nothing all of the time. You’re going to waste away. Now get in the drivers seat and drive.”
“No.”
“Aiden Riley Iero-Way. Don’t tell me no. Get out of the car!”
I threw the door open, almost hitting him because he was talking to me through the window, and got out. “Fine! And when we fucking crash and die I’ll laugh!” I sneered, going to the driver’s seat.
Daddy muttered as he got into the car, shaking his head. I heard something along the lines of ‘growing out of’, ‘ago’, and ‘why me?’
I closed the door, put my foot on the brakes, and with shaking hands started the car. I took a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves.
“You can do this, honey. I’m sorry I’m forcing you into this but you have to start living. You have to get past this, before it hurts you.” Daddy said gently.
“Piss off.” I muttered, but not necessarily to him. I pulled out of the driveway and found myself driving to the store. “Fine. Do I have to go in?”
“If you want food, you do.” He said, getting out of the car.
“Do you think I fucking want food?” I sneered, pointing at my stomach.
“Why don’t you quit drawing attention to the fact that you have a problem? This is what proves you aren’t an adult! An adult would try to fix it, you mope and complain because you want people to feel sorry for you. You think anyone in this goddamn store cares? No. I care, your family and friends care. No one else does. So stop it. I’m sick of babying you for something that you can control. I won’t do it anymore. It may seem cruel, but you’re going to thank me. From now on, you are not sitting at home watching TV all day.”
“Fuck you!” I yelled, tears filling my eyes. “You think I’m wanting fucking attention?! I don’t fucking want anyone to care! I just want to be normal.” I began to sob. “So quit babying me and leave me alone!”
“If I leave you alone you’re going to die! It’s been months, Aiden, and you’ve taken zero initiative to get better. Any time you try, you take more steps back then forward.” Daddy took a deep breath. “Now please stop crying. Let’s go get food, and go home.”
“I don’t want to go anywhere with you.” I cried, well aware I looked like a five year old.
“Fine, Aiden… fine.” He started to walk off.
He hadn’t gotten five feet away when I shuffled to get to him. I fell into step next to him, watery hiccoughing.
“We’re going to help you through this, but we can only help you if you help yourself.” He draped an arm around me in a hug and we walked into the store…
I didn’t stop throwing up instantly. It took me a few days, but from then on I always made sure no one was around. Which in itself prevented me from throwing up a lot of the time.
Daddy hadn’t told anyone. I only knew this because Dad acted no different around me. Of course with Dad feeling sick so much (I knew, though I wasn’t supposed to.), no one wanted to bother him with anything. I felt bad for Dad, and wished I knew what to say. From what I could figure out he wasn’t sick, but he was getting really bad headaches. They didn’t sound like a whole lot of fun.
I sat on the couch, my usual spot since coming home, feeling guilty. I knew that I should be doing something. I was sitting here trying to get better, and I really was, but all I was doing in reality was watching cartoons and moping.
“I’m going to the store, Aiden.” Daddy said, coming into the living room. “Why don’t you come with me and pick out some food?”
I sighed to myself and nodded, knowing if I protested it would only lead to Daddy telling me I had to eat, I was only harming myself, blah de blah. I had heard all of their arguments so many times I could predict what part they would say next.
So why wasn’t I listening?
I was trying to, but I can’t control the fact that after three bites I feel violently sick to my stomach. When you get used to not eating, you’re used to not eating. It’s simple as that.
“Let’s go, then. FRANK, AIDEN IS COMING WITH ME! I LOVE YOU! BYE!” Daddy called up the stairs.
“LOVE YOU BOTH! BE CAREFUL!” Dad replied. It was hard to tell which of my fathers was louder.
I went on out to the car, climbing into the passenger seat. I hadn’t driven in so long, I probably would have to learn again. There had been no need for it in New York and here all I had done is mope inside.
I realize how lazy and selfish this sounds, but I can’t seem to stop.
“Aiden, you drive. I’m tired.” Daddy said.
“I don’t want to drive. My license is probably expired.” I said stubbornly.
“No, its not. I’m sick of you doing nothing all of the time. You’re going to waste away. Now get in the drivers seat and drive.”
“No.”
“Aiden Riley Iero-Way. Don’t tell me no. Get out of the car!”
I threw the door open, almost hitting him because he was talking to me through the window, and got out. “Fine! And when we fucking crash and die I’ll laugh!” I sneered, going to the driver’s seat.
Daddy muttered as he got into the car, shaking his head. I heard something along the lines of ‘growing out of’, ‘ago’, and ‘why me?’
I closed the door, put my foot on the brakes, and with shaking hands started the car. I took a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves.
“You can do this, honey. I’m sorry I’m forcing you into this but you have to start living. You have to get past this, before it hurts you.” Daddy said gently.
“Piss off.” I muttered, but not necessarily to him. I pulled out of the driveway and found myself driving to the store. “Fine. Do I have to go in?”
“If you want food, you do.” He said, getting out of the car.
“Do you think I fucking want food?” I sneered, pointing at my stomach.
“Why don’t you quit drawing attention to the fact that you have a problem? This is what proves you aren’t an adult! An adult would try to fix it, you mope and complain because you want people to feel sorry for you. You think anyone in this goddamn store cares? No. I care, your family and friends care. No one else does. So stop it. I’m sick of babying you for something that you can control. I won’t do it anymore. It may seem cruel, but you’re going to thank me. From now on, you are not sitting at home watching TV all day.”
“Fuck you!” I yelled, tears filling my eyes. “You think I’m wanting fucking attention?! I don’t fucking want anyone to care! I just want to be normal.” I began to sob. “So quit babying me and leave me alone!”
“If I leave you alone you’re going to die! It’s been months, Aiden, and you’ve taken zero initiative to get better. Any time you try, you take more steps back then forward.” Daddy took a deep breath. “Now please stop crying. Let’s go get food, and go home.”
“I don’t want to go anywhere with you.” I cried, well aware I looked like a five year old.
“Fine, Aiden… fine.” He started to walk off.
He hadn’t gotten five feet away when I shuffled to get to him. I fell into step next to him, watery hiccoughing.
“We’re going to help you through this, but we can only help you if you help yourself.” He draped an arm around me in a hug and we walked into the store…