Status: Complete.
You've Got So Much Love in You
Just Push Me Away
To start this story off, my name is Kristy. I am 19 years old. My best friend is named Hayley Nichole Williams. Yes, the Hayley Williams of Paramore. You all see her hyper, happy, creative stage persona. I know the real Hayley, the one who can be the sweetest, funniest girl you've ever met, and then if you anger her, she may become your worst enemy. Overall, Hayley was an amazing person. Her personality just bursts with light. She's very smart, although she comes off as a bit of a blond. She's the one everyone loves, but there's one problem- I love her too.
Currently, we were on the Paramore tour bus. I was sitting on the couch, dueling Zac in Guitar Hero 3 and beating him. He groaned as he finally failed the song “Miss Murder” by AFI. I laughed victoriously.
“No fair! I say you cheated!” Zac complained, before Josh came in and laughed.
“I think you suck, Zac,” he said and shrugged his shoulders as his little brother gave him a death glare. Hayley soon walked out of the bunk area, planting a kiss on Josh. You see, they were dating, and I was dying inside slowly. I know that Hayley noticed a change in me when they started dating, because she confronted me about it, but I lied to cover it up, so she just shrugged it off.
Zac gave me a light punch in the arm as he walked past me to the bunks, gesturing me to follow him. The caring, sweet Zac would most likely be coming out when I go back there to see him. I followed obediently, and stopped when we got to his bunk, across from Hayley's.
“Kristy, I saw that look in your eyes when Hayley kissed Josh. You have to tell her soon. You're gonna end up dead. I worry about you,” he said and his eyes showed sadness. They all, except Hayley, knew I was suicidal at one point. Hayley thought she knew everything about me, thinking she was closest to me out of everyone I've ever known. I felt bad for leading her to believe that, when in reality, she knew nothing about me. It was sad, really. I didn't want to lie to her, but it was the only way.
“I can't tell her! She'd like, flip out and never speak to me again!” I half screamed, but Zac shushed me.
“Can't tell me what?” Hayley asked as she approached Zac and I. I tried to stutter something out, and Zac covered for me.
“She can't tell her mom about how she's getting sick because she'll worry,” Zac said and elbowed me to go along.
“Yeah, I'm getting like, these weird headaches and stuff,” I explained and Hayley looked at me, as though she didn't believe me. She hugged me and Zac gave me an apologetic smile as I shivered at her touch.
“Get well soon, best friend,” the last two words of that sentence, they killed me.
“I-I will..thanks..” I said and climbed into my bunk. Luckily, mine was at the top, on Zac's side. It was directly across from Hayley's, but she wouldn't be in her bunk anytime soon. I sobbed, and cried my heart out for what felt like hours before I heard Hayley climb into her bunk, but not before she snuck a peek in mine.
“You alright, Tinky?” she asked. Tinky Winky was my nickname, and she was Dipsy. It was stupid, but it was one of the only things I had left with her.
“Uh..sure..” I answered quietly. I heard her sigh and climb into her bunk.
“You know you can tell me anything, right?” she asked and her voice echoed with sadness.
“Y-yeah...” I responded, just wanting to end the conversation before I got in too deep.
“So tell me what's bothering you. You don't think I see the change in you?” her voice was getting sadder and sadder. I felt like I was being stabbed repeatedly in the heart. I hated it when she was sad.
“Nothing has changed,” I lied through my teeth.
“Something HAS changed, and I can see it. Just tell me...please...” she pleaded and her voice began to crack. Oh God, she was gonna cry.
“I...I think it's best we don't talk anymore, Hayley,” I sounded so cold, but I didn't mean to. I just...I couldn't do this anymore. I couldn't hide it anymore. I was gonna break soon, and this would be the end of me.
“No..no please no!” she begged and I only sighed, loud enough for her to hear.
“I'm getting off at the next rest stop. I won't bother you and Josh anymore,” I said and began to get up, packing my things and walking to the bus couch, not saying a single word to anyone. I asked the driver when the next stop was, and he said in about 2 minutes. I waited for what felt like forever, and we finally stopped. The whole band, walked out of the bus, to stretch their legs, but I wouldn't be coming back.
Currently, we were on the Paramore tour bus. I was sitting on the couch, dueling Zac in Guitar Hero 3 and beating him. He groaned as he finally failed the song “Miss Murder” by AFI. I laughed victoriously.
“No fair! I say you cheated!” Zac complained, before Josh came in and laughed.
“I think you suck, Zac,” he said and shrugged his shoulders as his little brother gave him a death glare. Hayley soon walked out of the bunk area, planting a kiss on Josh. You see, they were dating, and I was dying inside slowly. I know that Hayley noticed a change in me when they started dating, because she confronted me about it, but I lied to cover it up, so she just shrugged it off.
Zac gave me a light punch in the arm as he walked past me to the bunks, gesturing me to follow him. The caring, sweet Zac would most likely be coming out when I go back there to see him. I followed obediently, and stopped when we got to his bunk, across from Hayley's.
“Kristy, I saw that look in your eyes when Hayley kissed Josh. You have to tell her soon. You're gonna end up dead. I worry about you,” he said and his eyes showed sadness. They all, except Hayley, knew I was suicidal at one point. Hayley thought she knew everything about me, thinking she was closest to me out of everyone I've ever known. I felt bad for leading her to believe that, when in reality, she knew nothing about me. It was sad, really. I didn't want to lie to her, but it was the only way.
“I can't tell her! She'd like, flip out and never speak to me again!” I half screamed, but Zac shushed me.
“Can't tell me what?” Hayley asked as she approached Zac and I. I tried to stutter something out, and Zac covered for me.
“She can't tell her mom about how she's getting sick because she'll worry,” Zac said and elbowed me to go along.
“Yeah, I'm getting like, these weird headaches and stuff,” I explained and Hayley looked at me, as though she didn't believe me. She hugged me and Zac gave me an apologetic smile as I shivered at her touch.
“Get well soon, best friend,” the last two words of that sentence, they killed me.
“I-I will..thanks..” I said and climbed into my bunk. Luckily, mine was at the top, on Zac's side. It was directly across from Hayley's, but she wouldn't be in her bunk anytime soon. I sobbed, and cried my heart out for what felt like hours before I heard Hayley climb into her bunk, but not before she snuck a peek in mine.
“You alright, Tinky?” she asked. Tinky Winky was my nickname, and she was Dipsy. It was stupid, but it was one of the only things I had left with her.
“Uh..sure..” I answered quietly. I heard her sigh and climb into her bunk.
“You know you can tell me anything, right?” she asked and her voice echoed with sadness.
“Y-yeah...” I responded, just wanting to end the conversation before I got in too deep.
“So tell me what's bothering you. You don't think I see the change in you?” her voice was getting sadder and sadder. I felt like I was being stabbed repeatedly in the heart. I hated it when she was sad.
“Nothing has changed,” I lied through my teeth.
“Something HAS changed, and I can see it. Just tell me...please...” she pleaded and her voice began to crack. Oh God, she was gonna cry.
“I...I think it's best we don't talk anymore, Hayley,” I sounded so cold, but I didn't mean to. I just...I couldn't do this anymore. I couldn't hide it anymore. I was gonna break soon, and this would be the end of me.
“No..no please no!” she begged and I only sighed, loud enough for her to hear.
“I'm getting off at the next rest stop. I won't bother you and Josh anymore,” I said and began to get up, packing my things and walking to the bus couch, not saying a single word to anyone. I asked the driver when the next stop was, and he said in about 2 minutes. I waited for what felt like forever, and we finally stopped. The whole band, walked out of the bus, to stretch their legs, but I wouldn't be coming back.
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New story. Feedback is love. Thanks for reading, guys.Oh, and please don't get angry with me for writing this. I know Hayley is straight, this is just a wild idea created in my warped mind.
Oh, and any gaps, weirdness/strange changes in the scenes, are due to the fact that this is an edited version of a previous story I wrote, meaning I took out content. I did the best I could so, sorry if there's any confusion.