You've Got So Much Love in You

It didn't take much to figure out what hospital she was in. All I had to do was call her parents, but they were very reluctant to tell me where she was. I'm guessing if she was awake she'd told them what happened.

Riverside Hospital. 6th floor, where they keep the suicidal patients.

Zac was quick to get a cab for us to get there, but I was still just as nervous. I didn't know what I'd be walking into.

He held my hand tightly as we walked in, my bag slung over his shoulder.

"We're here to see a patient named Kristy Collins. Her parents said she was on the sixth floor," Zac said slowly, as though the words burned his mouth.

"Are you immediate family? Only family can see her right now."

"I'm her fiance!" I cried, gripping Zac's hand tighter than before. He winced.

The girl sighed.

"I can't believe I'm doing this but you can go on up. Room 2032," she sighed, gesturing us passed her.

"Thank you," I murmured, letting go of Zac's hand and practically running to the elevator. I could live to never see another hospital again and not be sad about it.

Zac followed me, walking slower as he pressed the sixth floor button.

I counted the seconds between each ding that signaled the new floor. 14 each.

"This is our floor," he said, pulling me along. I looked at the signs, and saw one that said "Rooms 2030- 2060"

Reluctantly as can be, I walked towards her room. Zac got there before me, coming back and stopping me.

"Hayles you don't wanna go in there," he warned. This made me more anxious as I shoved passed him and looked in the window of her room.

She was there, laying down. Her skin was pale and bruised. Her eyes were red all around them. Not to mention she looked like she'd lost weight. She could spare to gain a few pounds back, too.

"You know her?" a nurse approached behind me.

"Yeah. I'm the fiance that broke up with her," I sighed, resting my forehead on the glass.

"She was talking about you earlier, when she was up," the nurse stated blandly.

"Do you mind me asking what she said?"

"It was mostly incoherent, but I got the words "miss her" and "regret" out of it. She's very.. out of it. Her system is still recovering from the overdose," the nurse looked at her, sighing.

"Is she gonna be okay?" I managed, holding back the waterfall.

"The next few days are critical. If she improves and becomes stable, yes, she'll be fine, but if not, no, she won't be fine."

"Are we allowed to go in and see her?"

"You'd have to ask her parents, they're over there," the nurse pointed to the family waiting room. I nodded and walked over.

"Hi," I muttered. They turned to me. They both looked worn out and tired.

"Hi Hayley," her mom, Kathy, said.

"Hi Mrs. Collins."

"Hi there Hayley," her dad, John, he was much more gentle, more calm.

I waved to him.

"How's she holding up?" I asked, biting on my lower lip.

"Unstable. She gets better for awhile, then gets worse. It's a roller coaster," her mom shook her head, rubbing her temples.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," I managed to pull out of my throat. Nothing wanted to come up. My vocal chords would probably stop working any minute.

"I know it's hurting you, too, Hayles. You don't have to pretend it's not," Kathy said, rubbing my shoulder.

"I didn't mean for it to happen that way, honestly. I just wanted her to see that drinking wasn't helping her stress, but only making it worse," I tried to explain, fumbling with my words. I couldn't get them out in the right way.

"I know she's stubborn sometimes but at the end of the day, she loves you more than anyone. I've never seen her so ecstatic," Kathy smiled slightly.

I blushed. "Thank you. I love her, too, and I really hope she knows that," I sighed, sitting down on the chair. Her parents followed suit.

The nurse approached us and smiled warmly. I frowned.

"She's awake now, still incoherent, but she's awake. You can go talk to her if you'd like," she smiled, patting my shoulder as she walked away. Something told me that Kristy told this nurse more than she needed to know.

"You can go ahead, Hayles. She probably wants to see you. We'll see her later," they both smiled and went back to their previous conversation. I walked back down the corridor to her room, seeing her lying there with her eyes barely open.

Something about her told me, "Fragile, handle with care."

I opened the door reluctantly, walking in and sitting down, keeping my eyes off her.

Her head turned, looking at me. She frowned and furrowed her brows together.

"Krist?"

She raised an eyebrow.

"I love you," I murmured, knowing she was probably still out of it like the nurse had said.

I wasn't shocked when she turned herself away, staring blankly at the T.V.

I don't blame her for that, not a single bit.

"You don't have to talk to me, but I just wanted to be near you," I sighed, resting my elbows on my knees and my head in my hands.

She nodded. I could tell she was slightly high from whatever shit they had her on. Probably for the best right now though, she'd be screaming at me otherwise.

The nurse soon walked in, adjusting her pillows.

"Can she talk?" I asked, confused.

"Yep. She can. I think she's just choosing not to. The only time she talks is when we stop giving her the sedative."

"Is she in pain without it?"

"No but she tried to kick one of the doctors. They keep her sedated for safety."

"Can you take her off it? I have a feeling she'll be fine without it," I couldn't help but have the edge in my voice.

"Only her doctor can, he'll be in soon," the nurse left, leaving me slightly angry and still upset that I couldn't hear her voice.

I sat quietly, watching the T.V. until her doctor came in, 20 minutes later.

He didn't even have a chance to do anything before I popped my question on him.

"Can you take her off the sedative?"

He looked at the monitors, then back to me.

"She's a fighter, alright. We can try taking her off of it. But she won't be normal for a few hours," he sighed, taking the IV out of her hand.

"Thank you. Do you mind if I stay in here for a little awhile?"

"You're family, right?"

"I'm her um.. fiance."

"Then you can stay as long as you want," he smiled and left quickly.

I yawned, resting my head on the back of the chair. I figured I'd need a nap and I had a few hours until she was normal again. My eyes closed, as I counted backward until I fell asleep

_!_!_!_!_!_!_!_!_!_!_!_!_!_!_!_!_!_!_!_

(Kristy's Perspective)

I could feel the high from the medicine wearing off, thankfully. I was sick of not being able to talk and speak for myself.

I couldn't remember having any visitors today though, other than my parents.

Oh well.

I yawned, turning to face the wall rather than the door. I gasped when I saw Hayley lying on the couch, asleep. She looked so worn out, but still beautiful as ever.

She stirred slightly, stretching her arms out and sitting up.

"Krist?" she asked, looking at me. I nearly died.