I'm Burning Can't You See?

I stood over a suitcase on my bed trying to make the rest of my clothing fit in it. My best friend sat next to it trying to convince me to not go.

“Don’t give me that look. You know I have to go Jess.” I was trying to keep my eyes off of hers.

“No you don’t! Do you know how many colleges there are here?” she whined.

“Jessica.” I sighed at her.

“Stephanie.” she mocked.

I rolled my eyes as I put the last piece of clothing I owned in the suitcase. I gestured for her to sit on top of it and as she did she crossed her arms over her chest. I zipped it up and she rolled off and onto my bed. I took the suitcase and placed it with all the others next to the door.

“Ok, ready for bed?” I asked yawning.

“No.” she pouted.

“Why not?”

“Because the next time I see you I’ll be saying goodbye.” she looked up at me and her eyes started to fill with tears.

“Jess don’t.” I sat next to her on my bed, tears brimming my eyes. We embraced each other in a hug and that seemed to do it. Tears spilled from our eyes as we literally cried on each others shoulders. We lay down and continued to sob to one another and before we knew it we’d cried ourselves to sleep.

♦♦♦

I shot up out of bed trembling. I’d just dreamt that the plain I was on crashed but I awoke just as the plain hit the ground. God it had to be an airplane too. This trip would be my first time flying and that dream hadn’t made it any easier.

I looked to my side were Jessica should have been, but she wasn’t. I got out of bed and started looking for her but wasn’t finding her anywhere.

I badly need a shower more than I needed to find her. She was probably just downstairs anyway.

I grabbed the clothes I’d left sitting out for today and headed toward the bathroom.

I turned on the shower and got in. The warm water running down my body made me almost forget I was leaving today. But I realize it again. How could I forget? Going to a different country. Going to Germany…Germany. I was going to Germany. I was to stay with my mom’s friend so that I could attend college there. The college she and my mother both went to. It was a tradition on my mother’s side of the family to go to that college. She’s German and met my dad over there and they eventually moved here to Texas together.

I finally got out of the shower and put on my clothes. I wanted to look decent upon arrival so I was wearing my light blue boot cut jeans that covered most of my white Adidas. I also threw on a black and white stripped v-neck shirt.

I straightened my naturally curly hair and applied little make-up. Although I wanted to look nice I was going for comfortable.

I walked down stairs and saw Jessica sitting on the couch with my parents and my younger sister sitting on the floor. I really didn’t want to leave her. She was just going through high school and I wanted to be there when she needed me.

I sat down next to my mom and looked at her. “I gonna miss you.” I sighed. “When do we have to leave?”

“Whenever you’re ready.” my dad stated.

“Are you ready?” my mom questioned.

“I don’t know, I guess.” I looked over at Jessica.

“Jess, Ryan…will you guys help me get my stuff?” Jessica and my sister got up and followed me to my room.

They each grabbed one and I grabbed my purse which was close to the size of a duffle bag, and the last suitcase.

We carried them out to the trunk of my mom’s car. It was actually mine but my parent didn’t think it would be a good idea to have it shipped over.

We got to the airport and took care of all my luggage then went and stood in front of my departing gate.

I walked to Ryan and gave her a hug. “If you ever need anything or just want to talk, call me anytime. I mean it. Anytime.” she nodded and took a deep breath. My mom and dad were next. Then lastly Jess.

“Don’t forget about me.” she whispered in my ear as we hugged.

“Never.” I promised.

A voice came over the intercom telling all the passengers that our flight was now boarding. I grabbed my purse and sighed taking in one last look at everyone. Then I turned and left for my flight.