She Said, She Said

I was woken up by the irritating feeling of someone or something poking my arm. I shook my shoulder violently and snuggled deeper into the pillow, the scent something I wasn't too familiar with. Again, as if to aggravate me, the poking got harder. I let out a little squeak of protest, but kept my eyes tight shut, too comfortable to move.

"Valerie!" The voice sounded rough and quiet. At first, I didn't recognize it, but then I knew, or at least had a little idea of who it was.

"What?" I groaned, suddenly feeling stiff and awkward. With a quick shake to my head to make the dizziness go away, I opened my eyes. As I had expected, I was still in the Resource Room and not in my own comfortable bed. The welcoming pillow turned out to be none other than Caleb's shoulder, who looked rather embarrassed — Caleb, not his shoulder. Heat rose to my own cheeks when I realized the sides of my lips were wet. I quickly swept the drool off with my arm.

Just hope he didn't see, a quiet voice at the back of my mind declared. I looked at Caleb's shoulder and was relieved to see that it was completely drool-free.

"You were sleeping on me."

I rolled my eyes despite the situation we were in. "Yes, I'm aware of that." I arched my back and sighed as my muscles finally stretched. "How long have we been here?"

"Two hours, I think." Upon hearing his rough answer, I did the math in my head and gasped quietly to myself, looking around. We were the only ones in there.

"Crap," I mumbled under my breath, shifting my position so I could transfer myself onto the wheelchair. "It's six; you're not supposed to be here."

"Don't worry about it." He stood up and brushed off his clothes. "We're leaving in fifteen minutes."

After helping me onto the wheelchair, Caleb and I both exited the room. The hallways were alive with small talk and the sounds of laughter. I looked around for a familiar face, but when couldn't see anyone I recognized, turned back to Caleb. He was standing, leaning against the doorway observing the scene around him, as if he'd never seen kids and teenagers socialize before.

I cleared my throat, "So, how was the movie?" As soon as I asked it, I knew it wasn't something I should've mentioned.

Caleb narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "Good, not that you would know."

"Right," I mumbled, embarrassed. "Sorry about that . . . you could've woke me up — hey, why didn't you just wake me up earlier?" Now I was suspicious.

"Because," he muttered, looking elsewhere. "Because."

"Oh, way to be reasonable." I couldn't help but chuckle at his childish answer.

"Whatever." He rolled his eyes and started walking towards the elevator.

"Hey!" I yelled after him, my voice barely audible above the chatter. "Where are you going?"

"Somewhere you wouldn't be!" he barked over his shoulder and continued walking.

I smiled and started wheeling myself in the direction of my room.

*

Sunday came around sooner than I expected. Before I knew it, Sylvia was pulling the warm sheets off of my body and yelling at me to get up. She babbled on about things I couldn't really understand, but I nodded and grunted every now and then to let her know I was somewhat paying attention to her. Through my eyelids, I could feel the sun's rays on my face.

"Come on, Val!" Sylvia exclaimed and I heard her wheelchair coming closer. I finally opened my eyes and sat up in bed. Rubbing at my eyes, I saw that Sylvia had already gotten dressed in a bright red top and black jeans.

"You look pretty," I mumbled, groggy. "What's the occasion?"

Sylvia rolled her eyes. "Thank-you." She wheeled herself away from me and towards her closet. "I'm going out with my parents today."

"Oh." I looked down at my lap and pretended to focus on the wrinkled white sheets. I knew she hadn't meant it that way, but it still hurt to think that I couldn't look forward to what she was about to do. I had to somehow make myself realize that not everyone had lost their parents.

"Sorry," Sylvia mumbled suddenly beside me. She grabbed my cold hand and squeezed it, a shadow of a smile on her face. I nodded at her, forcing a small grin.

"When are you leaving?" I asked and forced myself out of bed. Pulling the wheelchair closer, I plopped down on it and went inside the steamy bathroom, indicating that Sylvia had been there only minutes before.

"In fifteen minutes or so." Her voice seemed far away. "Actually, whenever I get the call that they're here, I'm out."

I nodded my head at my own reflection and shut the door to the bathroom. The sound of Sylvia humming a tune was drowned out by the pitter-patter of the water as I turned on the shower. I sighed a sigh of content as the warm water washed over my lazy form. I closed my eyes. A scene very much like the one I was experiencing right then flashed before my eyes. It reminded me of my home, the bathroom I shared with Sabrina and . . . just everything about it. It was like I could smell Sabrina's baby smell, the shampoo, every other tiny detail that had been wedged deep into my vision.

As soon as I turned the shower off, the heat in the room started to vanish. I shivered and, after wrapping the towel around myself, got out. The steam on the mirror prevented me from looking at myself and for that I was grateful. I felt as if though I did not have enough energy to deal with the way I looked. A ring sounded and broke through the silence. Despite my manners, I put my ear against the door and listened. I could hear Sylvia’s perky voice agreeing to whatever was being said. After a few more phrases like “Okay” and “Be There” I heard shuffling on the other side. The knock jolted me back from the door, my heart pounding.

“Y-Yeah?” Making my voice sound normal was proving to be a challenge.

“I’m leaving!” Sylvia answered. It didn’t seem like she had noticed anything. “Bye! See you later.”

“Bye,” I whispered and cleared my throat. “Bye,” I said louder. When no response came, I realized that she had already left, and, for some reason, this depressed me a great deal. What was I supposed to do now, with no one to keep me company?

After getting dressed and settling down into the wheelchair by the window, I picked up the book I’d been reading and tried to let the words take over my senses. The letters twisted and turned and, as hard as I tried, I just couldn’t concentrate. Something was bugging me. It felt as though I was forgetting something important. The telephone rang and my thoughts disappeared into oblivion.

The receiver felt cool to the touch. “Hello?”

“Hello, this is Cori Webb, the receptionist. We have a visitor down here for Valerie Darrell. Please come down as soon as possible. It looks like you’ll be away for the day.”

“Who—?” But before I could finish my question, I heard the distant sound of a beep. I put the receiver down and looked down at my clothes. A pajama shirt and baggy shorts didn’t exactly seem fit for “going out.” Throwing on a black and white halter, and some jean shorts, I ran a comb through my thin hair. I made my bed as quickly as possible and, making sure to shut the door tightly, got out of there with a worry nagging at the back of my mind. Who was coming to visit me?

By the time I got down to the lobby, my strands of hair had somehow tangled into one another. I ran my fingers through them just when the doors of the elevator opened. At first, it was surprising to see Aunt Debra standing there, her hands wringing nervously together, but it soon came rushing back to me. She’d asked me to go to the house and I’d agreed. And now we were going. My eyes widened and my heart suddenly decided to pound loudly in my ears. I barely heard Aunt Debra greet me with a shy “Hello, how are you?” and a smile. I answered her question properly and forced a smiled back.

“Would you like to get breakfast first?” Aunt Debra asked as she helped me into the car and went around to put the wheelchair in the back. I answered with a quiet “Yes” and braced myself for the painful ride. It turned out not to be as bad as the last one and I found myself looking out the window as the wind rustled my hair. We stopped outside a small building with large ceiling-to-floor windows and a small parking lot. Through the glass windows, I could see the inside of the diner was bustling with people. A small, plump lady with a hairnet adorning her head was running around taking orders.

As soon as we entered, I was surrounded by the smell of hot pancakes. My stomach rumbled loudly. An old couple sitting nearby turned and smiled at me. Aunt Debra and I got a table in the small corner by the window. The sun’s rays were spread out across the table. I transferred myself from the wheelchair onto the plush red seat and sighed. The delicious smells were getting to me. I tapped my fingertips on my lips to prevent myself from asking Aunt Debra to order. When we were settled, Aunt Debra nodded and pointed to the menu.

Without even glancing at it I told her, “Blueberry pancakes with maple syrup and some cold chocolate milk.”

I saw Aunt Debra’s lips turn up and, after looking through the menu, she turned to me with a thoughtful look on her face. “You’re sure you want to go?”

“Yes,” I lied.

Aunt Debra looked at me uncertainly but didn’t say anything. The plump woman I’d seen through the window waddled over to us with a welcoming smile. “And what can I get you ladies today?” Aunt Debra told her our order. “Alright, be back in a jiff.”

The whole scene seemed so bizarre to me all of a sudden. It felt old-fashioned. When I used to go out to breakfast with my parents, we always went to the same diner, the one with the fancy tablecloths and the young waitresses. This felt exactly the opposite of that.

“So,” I started, trying to think of something to say. After all, Aunt Debra had come to take me back to my home when she could’ve been out enjoying herself on this warm Sunday morning. The least I could do was make it worth her while. “How’ve you been?”

Aunt Debra gave me an odd smile. “Okay, I suppose. Just work has been putting a lot of stress on my mind these days.” She got a far-away look in her eyes and then grinned. “How about you? How are you finding things at the rehabilitation centre?”

It took me a moment to answer her question. I thought it over and then said, quietly, “Alright. The people are nice. But it’s only been a week. I have a long way to go.” I only realized this as I said it. I’d only been there such a short amount of time and already I’d made great friends, met wonderful people who seemed ecstatic to help me recover. Except for Caleb, of course.

“Well, that’s—” Aunt Debra stopped. The lady who’d taken our order came back with a tray full of food.

“Here you go.” She set the tray on the table and, after smiling at us, wandered off.

I looked at the steaming pancakes hungrily, waiting for them to cool down. Aunt Debra chewed thoughtfully on the waffles she’d ordered, and when she saw I was looking, flicked the fork in a kind of thumbs-up. The first bite was wonderful. The blueberries got lost in the warm bread and I found myself shoveling large amounts of the pancakes into my mouth.

When we were finished, we paid and left. The outside world remained the same, but somehow I felt lighter. And now I was sure that I wanted to visit the place that was most dear to my heart.