Like a Shattered Mirror

I woke up in a bed, aching all over. The room was way too white and it was like the walls were coming at me, so I screamed bloody murder. The school nurse came running in, asking me what was wrong.

"The walls are closing! And this sound..Do you not hear my heart?!" I screamed so loud just to hear myself over my heart pounding in my ears.

"Honey, you went into shock! Do you know how many pills you were taking in?!"

"Shit." So now my dad was gonna know. "Please don't tell dad!" I begged.

"Honey, we have to. He needs to know."

"No! He doesn't! He can't know! He thinks I've coped!"

"Did someone die?" she asked and I knew my answer.\

"Yes." He was dead to me anyway. He wasn't in my life anymore, so he was as good as gone.

"Dear, pills can't solve that. Promise me you'll stop and I won't breathe a word." I nodded. It was a lie, but whatever made her feel better. "Who died?"

I couldn't remember. Who? Who had caused me such pain and torment? I knew this!

"...I can't remember," I said, spaced out. "Why can't I remember the name?" I couldn't even remember the face. I just knew it was a guy...

"Oh my...do you remember anything about today at all?"

"No. I don't...I can't remember much actually...All I know is dad is all I have left. Mom's gone, I think..."

"Go home and get some rest, okay?"

"Wait, what time is it?"

"You have an hour until school is let out."

"Ok." I hopped up and stepped outside. Why couldn't I remember this guy who had hurt me so badly?