Frankly, I Don't Love You.

“Okay so we just need five more poems and the last subject I’m thinking we should cover is love. Got any old poems in mind?” Frank and I had spent the last three weeks together so we had become fairly close. He was just one of those people that you could talk to about anything, well everything except my secret… We now sat in my living room on the couch trying to finish the project we had worked so hard on.

“I have two, somewhere in my room. There’s also one that won't stop bugging me, so I guess I’m going to have to write that one too. That leaves two poems; that is, if my math skills haven’t gone haywire.” he giggled “Can you handle that?”

“Sure, I have a bunch that I wrote before, Gerard and I, well, you know.” I trailed hoping he would get the message.

“A.J. can you tell me what happened? Please, I will really try to understand.” he pleaded. I could now see how hypnotizing pretty his eyes were. They were brown but somehow had hints of green in them. I pulled my self together trying not to stare at his eyes and sighed.

“Well, Gerard and I were really good friends, and he helped me through some hard times, so to say” I paused trying not to let the feelings resurface, “Anyways, he was perfect, but he has alcohol problems, and in order to keep from doing anything he suggested we break up. After a year, of a great relationship, it got ruined. I understand the reason we broke up and that’s why I was okay right away, yet the sting never goes away though” I made it through my vague explanation without crying.

“I see, I’m so sorry that you had to go through that. He was really sweet to you, I can tell and you’ll always have a special place in his heart. Trust me, I would know. You’re okay now though, right?” He looked sincere and I appreciated that. I had no idea he could be this sweet. I scooted closer to him enveloping him in a tight, warm hug. I smiled at how snuggly he was for only being a bit skinnier for than bony Mikey.

“I’m fantastic Frank, couldn’t be happier. Anyways best buddy, let’s learn more about each other.” I grinned.

“Um. Okay. Batman or Spiderman?” he asked.

“Spiderman!” I practically shouted.

“Traitor! You can’t like Spiderman because Batman is a million times better! I mean seriously, who has spider powers? He’s whiny too!” he retaliated while pushing me away.

“Who comes up with the name Batman? That’s so unoriginal! He doesn’t even have real superpowers! All he does is buy all of his gadgets!” I argued back

“Okay, okay we can find the middle ground here. I say we both dislike Superman.” he chimed.

“I agree with that!” I shouted.

“Your turn to ask a question A.J.!” he said as he scooted closer to me again because we both decided on one superhero to detest.

“If you could be any type of bug, what type of bug would you be?”

“Those that fly and that glow! Shoot I forgot the name of it!”

“A firefly maybe?” I asked mocking him

“I knew that! I was just seeing if you knew, you know.

“Right, Frank, right. You’re oh so smart.” I scoffed

“And sexy I might add!”

“Ha! You wish you were sexy!”

“Why would I have to wish when I already am?”

“You have a very big ego Mr. Iero.”

“I could say the same to you, Alyson.” he teased

“Don’t call me Alyson!” I smacked his arm for emphasis of my anger

“Why do you have a problem with people calling you Alyson? A.J. is a cool nickname and all but Alyson makes you sound more feminine. Is that the reason why?”

“I’ll tell you why someday, Frankie,” I sighed.

“Fine, but what does the ‘J’ stand for?”

“My middle name of course and no I won’t tell you. I’ll leave it up to you to guess what it is.” I said quickly before he could ask what it was. He groaned and thought hard.

“Is it Jane?” I shook my head “Joan? Jae? Jamie?” I burst into laughter at how far off his guesses were.

“Um, no, no, and I like that name, but no.”

“Those are the only ‘J’ names for girls I could think of, unless you go to guys names, but I doubt it’s a guy’s name since Jeremy has a ‘J’ name. I don’t know, I give up, please tell me?” he rambled

“My middle name is Jasmine, you know, like the flower?” I blurted out and was surprised by his expression. Awe struck his face. I furrowed my eyebrows as to read what he was thinking but got no reception. “It’s too girly isn’t it?”

“It fits you perfectly! It’s not girly; it seems down to earth almost. I like it. Can I call you Jasmine since you seem to lose control when I speak of your first name?”

There was no way to get out of this argument. Frank usually had his way with everything. He won this battle, but I would be certain to win the next one, “Can I call you Frankenstein then?”

“I can live with that” he shrugged then squealed, “Come on Jasmine! Let’s go to Gerard and Mikey’s and hang out with them.” he said taking my hand and leading me off the couch and out of the house.

Before we walked to Gerard and Mikey’s we walked a couple of houses down the street to see that his mom was okay with him going. Out of all the times I had been at Frank’s in the past month, his mom was always working, but today she had the day off after working a full twenty four hours. I hadn’t seen her for the longest time and wasn’t sure she would recognize me.

“Frank I’m in the kitchen” a soft voice echoed through the house as we shut the door. I followed Frank down the hall towards the back of the house towards his kitchen. Frank’s mom didn’t look much like him, but that’s not to say she wasn’t pretty because she was. She wore a smile as she made dinner, which looked like spaghetti.

“Hi mom.” Frank said.

“Finally you’re home Frank and A.J. it’s good to see you around these parts again! I haven’t seen you in ages!” she pulled me into a tight hug.

“Hi Ms. Iero how are you?” I said shyly.

“Oh, sweetie call me Linda. I’ve been great; I finally got a day off. Are you the one that’s been keeping Frank busy?” she asked while ruffling her son’s hair. I giggled at his expression, embarrassed.

“Mom don’t touch my hair! A.J. and I are partners for an English project so we have to hang out a lot now, but at least we get along better now.”

“That’s nice honey,” she said, “would you guys like to stay for dinner before you head out? I made my famous spaghetti” she gestured toward the pot that was on the stove. I looked at Frank and he shrugged again with embarrassment which made me laugh again. I nodded to his mom and she made Frank set the table. While he did that we talked about the project and school. The conversation seemed to head in an entire different direction all of a sudden.

“Frank used to have the cutest little crush on you when you guys were small. I guess it never really faded, it just grew. Then again, I always knew you two would end up together” he voice was sincere.

“Oh no, Frank and I aren’t together” I corrected almost too quickly

“Not yet at least.” she gathered the bowl of spaghetti as I helped with the salad and we walked to the dining room where Frank had barely finished setting the table. Frank’s mom sat opposite to Frank and I. The meal was almost too quiet. I couldn’t stop thinking about what she said. Was it possible that she was right? Having a crush on Frank was roughly the same as having a crush on Mikey which wasn’t natural. I looked to my left and saw the Frank that wasn’t my best friend but just an ordinary guy. Perfect seemed to be an understatement. I mentally hit myself for having such thoughts, but Linda’s words couldn’t stop running through my mind from the time I finally picked my fork to eat until the time we departed to go see Gerard and Mikey.