Frankly, I Don't Love You.

Love was the one emotion I would never feel. Past relationships had been so hollow that I simply mistook lust for like. I couldn’t help it. They would just make it easier as well, swooning all over me like those seagulls from Finding Nemo and their fish obsession. The fact that I couldn’t have a relationship like Gerard and A.J. was eating me up inside somehow. I couldn’t help but crave the intensity of caring someone in that matter.

As I walked to school the week following the day where A.J. and I had had our little quarrel, I thought about the perfect relationship I had always dreamed about. That was never going to happen mainly because of the fact that I was not known as an emotional type of guy. When I swung by Mikey’s house I was surprised to see that A.J. had answered the door. She stood there wondering what to say. Instead of waiting for her to speak, I quickly drew up conversation.

“Hi A.J. I came to see if Mikey was ready for us to walk to school. Can I come in please?” I said in a tone of voice that not only surprised her but me as well. Where had that immense hatred gone? How could emotions that were mutual in disliking exist if I suddenly asked her for something nicely? Somehow it didn’t make sense. I knocked out of my wandering thoughts fast enough to hear her response.

“Sure, I’ll go get him.” she replied suspiciously, but at the same time not bothering to recall what had happened between us. She left me there on the door step, while she disappeared into the dark house. A.J. emerged back with my lanky best friend, who still had tooth paste on his chin and had a smudge of black on his cheek. I couldn’t help but laugh at Mikey because he had a goofy grin on his face and there was smoke coming from the kitchen which was visible through the front hallway of the house. A.J. suppressed a giggle as she too along with Gerard who had appeared out of thin air, began walking ahead of Mikey and I down the road to school. I turned around to Mikey and still couldn’t help but be puzzled as to why he had the smudges on his face.

“Mikey, would you mind enlightening me on why you’re covered in soot? I swear you look like one of those chimney sweeps from that one movie…” the name of the movie had been on the tip of my tongue but it slipped my mind.

“Do you mean Mary Poppins?” Mikey piped up.

“Yeah that one” I answered vaguely. His grin widened and he started giggling.

“Well…” Mikey started.

“Your friend here is an idiot.” A.J. butted in, "He stuck a fork in the toaster! Who honestly in their right mind sticks a fork in the toaster? He’s lucky as hell that he didn’t get electrocuted!” she yelled not bothering to turn around to face us. I laughed as the image of Mikey trying to get his burnt toast weaved its way into my head.

Mikey sighed in embarrassment. “I was trying to get my toast before it could end up burned. You know very well I don’t like burnt toast A.J!” he replied “It wasn’t my fault that I didn’t know toasters and metal don’t mix!” The rest of us looked at Mikey curiously.

Somehow I knew today was going to be different. And not in the way I would expect it.