Ever So Slightly

I scold myself inwardly. Why get this pent up over a guy in the first place - I always said I should just turn lesbian.

‘Don’t act attached and you won’t get attached,’ I think to myself, pacing through the kitchen and pulling open the hotel room door. I see William on the other side with Gabe, and he smiles crookedly at me, eyes crinkling at the corners - I suddenly realise that it would be far easier said than done.

I just love that smile.

‘Bananni!’ greets Gabe exuberantly, holding up his palm. I slap it half heartedly with my own in a high five as he asks ‘How’s shit?’

‘Shit’s…um, good, thanks Gabe. And…your shit?’

‘Not looking too good this morning, mmm-mmm,’ he replies, shaking his head. ‘All sorta yellow with these pink flecks in - I don’t think I should have eaten that play dough-’

‘Ew!’ I protest. ‘That’s gross - I didn’t mean your actual shit.’

‘Well that’s what you said Bananni - anyway dudes, I’m off for a bit of jamming with the Pleasure and Suavez, so if you need me you know where to catch me.’ He starts walking away towards the elevator but turns back to wave. ‘See ya guys, nice day.’

I wave, half a smile on my face, before I turn back to Will. I lick my lips and then bite the lower one, as he looks at me.

Dear god, I hope this isn’t going to be awkward.

Slowly he raises his hands to my cheeks, pushing either side of my mouth up with his thumbs.

‘Smiile,’ he says, grinning toothily at me, as though to show me what to do. I laugh at him, instantly relaxing.

‘So where are we going?’ I ask.

‘Well, there’s this hot little bistro place just down the block that does the most amazing salads,’ he says, beginning to walk. I follow him, matching his pace. ‘I mean, seriously, the stuff you can put in them. Vicky dragged us there the first day we got here-’ I feel a tight pang of jealousy - ‘’Cause she was all about salad equals healthy, but we got there and she’s like, piling in the pastrami, and chorizo…and ham and mayonnaise - this weird pink stuff that we didn’t even know what it was, but man it was good. Rice and pasta…that was one hot salad - we left and we were like, struggling to even waddle we were that fat.’ He guffawed and I smile widely.

How is it he can put me in such a great mood, so quickly? He punches the button for the elevator and steps in, holding the doors so I can do the same.

As we descend the floors, he steps forward a little so that he’s level with me, and links his fingers with mine. I glance up at him in shock just as the doors open, and he tugs me out gently, leading me out of the reception and onto the street outside. I put my head down so that he can’t see the huge smile that plastered over my face, and walk with him, down the street and round a corner to a street lined either side with little shops.

‘So,’ he says, turning his head towards me. ‘You going to come watch us play tonight?’

‘Yes!’ I grin excitedly. ‘I mean, yes. Was I asleep when you left yesterday?’

‘Yeah - I didn’t want to wake you, you looked so…tired.’ He cleared his throat. ‘But your not tired now, right?’
‘Nope,’ I smile, baring my teeth at him as he had done to me in the hotel corridor. He grinned and looked ahead, an action I repeated to a greater extent as he began to rub his thumb over my index finger.

I sigh happily.

‘What’s wrong?’ he asks.

I turn my head to face him and smile again. ‘Nothing,’ I say. ‘Nothing at all.’