I'm Too in Love to Let This Go

Mikey Way.

The name means little to most people but means the world to me. Someone just has to mention his name and I get Goosebumps and a wickedly huge grin on my face. It's really quite ridiculous.

My friends are past the point of caring when it comes to my ramblings about that certain boy. As far as they're concerned they've heard it all, and to be honest they probably have. I tend to repeat myself quite a bit, especially with anything to do with him.

To say I had a crush on him would be an understatement. I'm pretty much infatuated with him to the point where it's scary. If I was infatuated with him any more I'd be stalking him. And it's not like I haven't thought about doing that.

I rarely even stop thinking about him. He drives me crazy and he doesn't even know it. Oh, how I wish he knew it. He barely even knows I exist. I know that must seem clichéd and stupid and you all think I'm lying but I'm being serious. He doesn't even glance my way. Trust me I know. I never stop looking at him, every chance I get.

I'm sixteen and in high school so it's normal to have a crush on someone that is a year older than you and so amazingly good looking and kind and sensitive and just plain fucking perfect, right? But this is different. I know that this isn't just some stupid crush and it won't go away when someone knew catches my eye. I feel as if he is the one I am meant to be with. I really do believe this even though my friends think I'm being silly.

It's not just his looks that I like. Sure his skinny frame, dark eyes and light brown hair certainly attracts me to him but his personality has to be the best part of him. Sure I've never talked to him before but that shouldn't matter. And plus you can just tell he is a good person. I know just from observing for the past two years that he has to be.

I long to be close to him. Just to even talk to him would be enough and maybe for a hug once in a while. Gosh I bet his hugs would be the best. He has such-

"Miss Iero? Are you paying attention?" My stupid old bat of an English teacher's voice plummeted through my train of thoughts, making me look over from where I'd been staring out of the window, for the past god knows how long.

"Oh, uh no," I said a deep blush coming to the crescent of my cheeks as everyone turned to look at me.

"Well could you please tear yourself away from your daydreams long enough to pay attention please? I'm here to teach you not for the good of my health." Miss spoil-everyone's-fun snapped, turning back to the chalkboard to carry on with explaining what an anecdote was, to all the people who were too stupid to comprehend it the first time she explained it.

I scowled at the back of her head and sighed as I rested my head in my hand. It wasn't my fault that I could rarely pay attention in classes. It was Mikey Way's fault for taking over every thought I had. It's not like I could tell her that though.

Just as I was starting to drift off into another daydream when I felt something hit me on the back of my head. It wasn't painful but I still exclaimed 'ow' a little loudly anyway, mainly out of habit than anything else.

"Miss Iero!" Miss Jones said.

"Sorry miss. Got cramp in my hand. Nothing to worry about. I'll survive," I said quickly. She rolled her eyes and turned around again. I turned in my seat to see one of my best friends, Claire, sitting a couple of seats behind me. She pointed to the floor and I looked down seeing a little balled up piece of paper sitting right next to my foot.

Watching Miss Jones carefully I picked up the paper and unfolded it. Stop thinking about him. Do you want to pass this class or not? Oh and while you were off in la la land, you were drooling. It wasn't a very attractive look for you.

I scoffed and put my hand up in the air, flipping Claire off in the process. She knew me better than that. that was virtually impossible for me to do. She just liked to annoy me about it.

Mikey Way. He's the reason I wanted to get out of bed in the morning and the reason I wanted to go to sleep at night, so I could dream of him. He was the reason I never paid attention in class and found it hard to talk about anything but him. He had a lot to answer for and he didn't even know it.