Brian Haner Jr

"Okay, I know you're worried," Brian said as he carefully steered his Explorer onto the main road. He had to force himself to merge with trafic when all he wanted to do was drive twenty in the slow lane so he coule be sure they got home safely.

At the stoplight, he quickly glanced over his shoulder and saw his daughter sleeping soundly in her car seat. Hope and love and terror battled it out in his chest. He felt like he'd been sucker punched and handed his heart's desire, all in the same moment. Nothing was ever going to be the same again.

"We'll get through this," he told her, then returned his attention to the road. "I've screwed up more than once in my life, but I swear, I'l do my damnedest not to screw up with you." He paused, then cleared his throat. "I should probably start by not swearing in front of you, huh? Sorry about that. See I don't have any practice at being a father. Fortunately you don't have any practice at being a kid, either. So we'll learn together. I'll be here for you no matter what. I learned that from my friend. Matt was always there for me. He did a good job, and hes not that much older then me. I've got twenty six years on you, kid."

He looked at her again. "Twenty six. Does that sound old to you?" Not surprisingly, she didn't answer.

He drew in a breath. He couldn't remember ever being this unsure of himself. He didn't want to break her or hurt her in some way. How did people become parents more than once? The task seemed so daunting. Maybe it got easier with practice. He could only hope.

He turned right at the next signal and entered his neighborhood. Matt had wanted to come along while he picked up his daughter, but Val had said he had to do this by himself. The sooner he got used to being alone with her the better for the both of them.

Brian frowned. "We can't keep calling you 'her' or 'the baby.' We're going to have to come up with a name. I wish you could tell me what you'd like... or atleast what you'd hate."

He pulled into his driveway, which circled infront of the large, two-story house.

"This is it," he said as he switched off the engine. "You're home."

His daughter wasn't overly impressed. She continued to sleep as he unstrapped her car seat. He slung the bag of supplies the hospital had sent home with him over one shoulder, then picked up the seat and carried it, and his daughter, inside.

Matt and Val were waiting in the foyer. "How did it go?" his friends asked.

"Okay." He let the bag slip to the floor and held out the carrier. "Here she is." He stared down doubtfully. "She's sleeping."

"Don't complain. She'll be up soon enough. Come see what we did."

He followed them upstairs and into his daughter's room. While he'd gone Matt had finished putting together the three-drawer changing table and Val had put all the clothes and linens away.

"Newborn size clothes are in the top drawer," she said, pulling it open to show him. "Everything else is in the lower drawers. Oh, and I hung the dress in the closet."

He glanced over his shoulder and saw the tiny dress hanging alone on the rack. It looked impossibly small and foreign. He sucked in his breath.

"I, ah, guess I'd better get her in bed," he said.

"Absolutely. I washed the sheets and the comforter. They're only been out of the dryer a few minutes, so they're probably even still warm," she said helpfully.

Brian glanced at Matt, but his friend shook his head. "You're going to have to learn how to do this sometime. Might as well be now."

Brian grunted because the alternative was to say something unpleasant and he'd already promised his daughter he wasn't going to do that.

First he unfastened the straps holding her in place. Carefully, supporting his baby's head the way Val and the nurse at the hospital had shown him, he lifted her from the car seat and cradled her against the crook of his arm. Then he crossed the room and gently put her in the crib.

She barely stirred. Then her big brown eyes opened, she wiggled once, yawned, then drifted off to sleep.

"I guess you're really a dad now," Matt said and slapped him on the back. "Congratulations."

"Thanks. I've got to do something about a name." He glanced at his friend. "I was thinking about Skylar, and we could call her Sky for short."

Matt nodded. "I like it."

"Me, too," said Val, then sniffed. "Let's go downstairs. If I stay here much longer, 'm going to cry. You know, hormones, babies, it's inevitable."

Both men hustled her out of the room, then Brian remembered the baby monitor and had to run back upstairs to get it. He turned on the unit on the dresser, clicked on the one in his hand, and paused by the crib.

"Hi, Sky," he murmered. "I'm glad you're sleeping. You should think about sleeping a lot. That would give your old man a break. Want to give it a try?"

Then because he couldn't help himself, he stroked the back of his index finger against her cheek. The warm skin was so incredibly soft. She barely stirred.

"I don't usually fall this fast, kid, but you seem to have a firm grip on my heart, I guess we're stuck with eachother."

Despite the fear, he knew then that there was no where else he would rather be.