"You're Going out With a Bang, Toots."

I paced the room, impatiently waiting for her. I had finally figured out what that damn feeling in my stomach was I got every time I looked at her. I could barely utter the word, because it was the one emotion I had vowed I'd never feel.

I’m supposed to be Gotham’s killer… the madman, the psychopath of Gotham. I was supposed to show Gotham that you couldn’t count on anybody for anything, and that things shouldn't go according to plan.. That, when given the choice of being killed or have someone else die in your place, they always choose the other person.

And here I am, a contradiction to my own philosophy. Having.. feelings for her, was a contradiction. Being willing to die in her place, was a contradiction.

So I decided that tonight, I would tell her of these.. feelings. Unknowingly, I was speaking out loud to a random goon who had been in the room when I had started pacing. He actually helped figure out what the damned feeling was. After he told me, I shot him, of course.

Love. Love was what I was feeling.

A knock interrupted my thoughts. Irritated, I barked for the person to enter, getting out my knife as I did so. This person was in for it. No one was allowed to interrupt me. But as I swung open the door, I stopped short.

Serenity was standing there. She was smiling nervously, biting her lip, as if she were uncomfortable in the dress she wore. She shouldn't be. She was absolutely stunning in it. It tied around her neck and stopped at her mid thigh.

She was… wow.

She cleared her throat expectantly, brushing a lock of her hair behind her ear. I felt my face go red. Thank God for fucking make-up!

“Sit down,” I ordered. The table I had the goons fix up - white tablecloth, candles, the works - was so small, I realized. God damn it - couldn't I have.. had feelings for someone less sexy?! We both sat down at the too small table - I made a mental note to kill the goons who fixed this up - and I hit my fist on the table.

Serenity jumped, and I went to apologize, but stopped myself just in time. Now why would I, Gotham’s most feared killer, apologize? I was The Joker, for Gotham’s sake, I could do anything! Why would I apologize!?

Because you love her! A little voice in my head reminded me. I banged my hand on the table once more, willing the voice to be quiet, and the door opened, revealing two clowns, bringing in our dinner. They set our plates down and left the room as quickly as they possibly could without running. I allowed myself a smirk.

Serenity, noticing this, took a bite of her food, and said, “You trained them well.”

Small talk. She was just making small talk.

I nodded. “Yes. You’ve got to insert fear into their lives... threaten to kill them, kill in front of them. You’ve got to let them know without telling them that you’re not afraid to kill them. That they’re all, what’s the word? Expendable…”

Serenity nodded and smiled. “Right. You’ve got to show them whose boss.”

I slapped the table, excited. “Exactly! You’ve got to show them who’s the Alpha dog!”

“That’s why you can’t show emotion, right? Because they’ll use it against you.”

I laughed, delighted. “Right!” I held up a finger. “Except anger. Anger is what they’re careful of. You’ve got to be a time bomb, one small thing can set you off.”

Serenity nodded. “That way they’ll be careful of what they say. One word—bam, they’re gone.”

“See, Serenity? This is why I like you. You know how I think… how I feel. You’re like my twin… you know everything you need to know about controlling something like this, you know how to make people be frightened of you, and I guess that’s why I…that’s why I fell in love with you.”

Serenity froze. “What?”

Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn! Why did I have to say that now when things were going to fucking good!?

“I… I like… you…” I tried to cover up.

“No… the other L word you said it… to… me.” She stuttered slightly, tongue-tripping over her words.

I sighed and licked my lips. “Serenity… I… I… love… you,” the words were difficult to get out.

There was something in her eyes. She looked like she was struggling whether or not to believe me. Then, she shook her head. “No… no, you don’t. You don’t love me.”

I blinked, too surprised to correct her thinking. “I… I do. I really like you…”

Serenity stood up suddenly, making the chair fall on its back, shaking her head. “No! No, you twist feelings around to get people to do what you want! You’re The Joker! You don’t have feelings for anyone, no matter what you say! You can’t! It’s… it’s impossible!” She started crying, tears streaming down her face, ruining her make-up.

Unsure at what to do I stood up and made a move to help her, to get her to stop crying. “Serenity, I…”

Serenity stomped her foot angrily. “No! I won’t let you to screw with my head! Stop lying!”

I walked a bit closer, confused as ever. What the hell was happening? She was supposed to understand! She was the only one. “Serenity, I -“

“Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!” She shrieked. “Stay the hell away from me, you bastard!” She took her wine glass and flung it at me, then ran out the door.

I managed to dodge the glass, but the wine spilled over me, making my hair plaster against my skin, and make my make-up run slightly down my face. I stood where I was, clenching my fists so hard that my palms were soon bleeding.How dare she reject me like that! The rage that was boiling inside me was about to go over the top.

There was a tentative knock on the door. “B-boss? Is… everything okay?”

I licked my lips. “Of course everything’s all right… why don’t you and whoever’s with you come on in, please?” The door opened slowly and five of my goons came in, each one of them holding guns. Perfect…

I walked slowly up to the closest one. “May I, uhh… borrow your gun, please?”

Confusion was evident in each of the goons’s eyes’, but, like a good little trained dog, he handed it over. “Boss?”

I shot him in the face, spraying blood everywhere. I laughed, a small bit of my pent up anger gone. “Now… who’s the man in charge here… ?”

The four remaining clowns were silent, so, to teach them a little lesson to speak when spoken to, I shot another one. “Well?”

“Y… you are, Sir…” One brave clown answered.

“Correct, but not who I meant.” I shot the one who answered, a nice chill going through my body as he slumped to the floor. I walked up to the two remaining clowns and pointed to each one with the gun, landing on the right one. “Who was in charge of this small group right here?”

The clown gulped. “Uh… he was, Sir,” he said, nodding toward the first one I had shot.

I smiled. “Thank you,” and shot him.

The last clown jumped in surprise, and I could almost hear him gulp as if he were dreading a question. Now why would he do that?

“Now,” I said, licking my lips, “since he,” I tipped my head towards the dead body of the leader on the floor, “is now... unable to continue his position due to unfortunate circumstances, what does that make you, do you suppose?”

The clown struggled to come up with an answer. “I’m… I’ve moved… up… in a position?”

“Congratulations, ahh… ?”

“Ron.”

“Congratulations, Ronny. Now, find out who Ser… she was with before she came here!”

“Uhh… Boss, Sir?”

“What!?” I snarled, just itching to kill him.

“Serenity was with, uhh, Jessica, Sir. Her best friend.”

Of course. I pushed past him, barreling down the hallway, ignoring the other goons. God damn that fucking bitch!

I kicked in the door, not knocking. The person in the room - Jessica - jumped up, surprised.

“Joker! Sir!”

I threw the gun I had in my hand down and got out my knife instead. “Shut up! Serenity was here with you when I called her for dinner, correct?”

She nodded. “Uhh… yes, Sir.”

I grabbed her neck and slammed her against the wall, holding the knife to her cheek. “What the hell were you two talking about!?” She brought her hand up to mine, pulling at it desperately to get it off. I only squeezed harder. “Tell me, God damnit!”

Her eyes bugged and she nodded, so I lessened my grip a small bit, enough for her to talk.

“We… it was… nothing important,” she gasped.

“FUCKING LIAR! YOU TOLD HER SOMETHING THAT MADE HER NOT BELIEVE A WORD I SAID! TELL ME THE FUCKING TRUTH!” I slammed her harder against the wall and stabbed the knife into it, an inch away from her head. “Next time, I won’t miss,” I promised.

“O-okay!” She choked. “I’ll tell you!”

I lessened my grip once again enough for her to talk.

“I… I told Serenity that you twist words around… that… that you tell people things they want to here so they’ll do what you want… so you can manipulate them…”

I knew it. I knew it was this bitch along!

“Why!? Why the fuck did you do it!?”

She started to cry. “Because… because I love you. She doesn’t deserve you!”

I licked my lips, twitching in anger. “And you do?”

She could only cry in answer.

"You're a selfish fucking bitch, and you don't deserve ANYTHING that you've gotten in your life. Have a happy time in hell, you fucking slut." With one swift motion I had stabbed her in the heart, and I left the knife jutting out of her chest as I stared at my work.

“Jess, I -“ She stopped dead when she saw Jessica slumped on the floor, and me covered in blood. Serenity dropped the things she was carrying and her eyes kept flickering from me to the body, her mouth opened in stunned silence.