Refuse to Surrender

Alex’s POV

I was in the kitchen, making some breakfast, when I heard my watch beep. Instantly, I looked at it but instead, my eyes landed on the date area of my watch. I bit my lip as I realized what day it was. Jacoby wasn’t up yet so I decided to finish up making breakfast before I go on a walk to think about things.

After placing the pan on the stove and turning the heat on, I grabbed some eggs and bacon from the fridge. Jacoby should be waking up soon but he thought it would be smart to watch Fight Club, Queen of the Damned, and both of the Underworld series last night. Now he’s sleeping in to who knows what time. In all honesty, I didn’t mind. Jacoby was weird that way and he amused me so it was all good.

I scrambled the eggs because that’s the only way I’ll eat eggs. I don’t like them any other way aside from scrambled so that’s how I make them. Hopefully Jacoby wouldn’t mind. I wrote a note and placed it on the coffee pot before I headed out the door, taking Rhapsody with me.

“We’re going for a walk, Rhapsody,” I said, hooking the leash to his collar, “For about an hour. Then we’ll come back and we’ll visit mom. Jacoby might come but I don’t know.”

Rhapsody barked as soon as we got outside. I locked the door behind me and headed straight for the beach. I pulled out a cigarette from the pack in my back pocket and lit it. Yes, I know it’s too early to be smoking but today can be an exception. I had a lot on my mind and smoking usually helps me relax and think straight.

“You want to visit mom with me, Rhapsody,” I asked as we walked along the beach.

Rhapsody wagged his little stub as he ran after the tennis ball that I threw. It was funny watching him attempt to wag his littlestub tail. To be bluntly honest, he really didn’t have much of a tail but he still was great dog.

Saints of Los Angeles just started playing and I recognized that as one of my ringtones. I pulled out my cell phone and saw that it was my house calling. A little smile crept onto my lips as I flipped it open and pressed the “talk” button.

“Hello?”

“Alex, where are you! I woke up and you weren’t around and Rhapsody wasn’t around either so I thought you got kidnapped or something,” Jacoby immediately said.

I laughed before I answered, “I just went on a walk. Didn’t you see the note on the coffee pot?”

“No,” he replied, sheepishly, “I didn’t go to the kitchen yet.”

“You weirdo,” I sighed, rolling my eyes, “Look, I’ll be back soon. Is that okay with you?”

“Yeah,” Jacoby mumbled.

“Okay, I made breakfast. It’s in the kitchen so get some food in your stomach.”

“Yes, mom,” he said, joking with me.

We both hung up and I placed my phone back into my pocket. I sighed as I flicked the ashes of my cigarette onto the ground. Rhapsody looked at me with that bright green tennis ball in his mouth, wagging his stub of a tail at me. I guess he was trying to humor me or something.

“You seriously are a strange dog, Rhapsody. Let’s get back home.”

Jacoby was still in the kitchen when we returned home. He was still eating while reading the comics section of the newspaper. A smile formed on my face when I looked at him. There was a guy who was in this thirties, reading the comics section. This guy will never cease to amuse me.

“Hey, you’re back,” Jacoby said when he realized I was in the kitchen as well.

“Yeah, I’m back,” I replied as I sat down.

“What’s up,” he asked, sensing there was something up with me today.

“I’m thinking about visiting my mother. You want to come,” I asked, answering his question at the same time.

“Yeah, I’ll come,” he answered, “I’d love to meet your mother.”

“Thanks,” I said, standing up, “Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go take a shower.”

I walked up the stairs and headed straight for my room, leaving Jacoby to finish with his breakfast and Rhapsody eating out of his dog bowl. There was no way in Hell that I would go visit my mother smelling all sweaty and disgusting.

Jacoby’s POV

I watched as Alex walked up the stairs to her room and bathroom. I had a feeling that there was something up considering she just left a note on the coffee pot and made breakfast. At first, I thought nothing of it but seeing her back inside made me think otherwise. Alex seemed depressed, lost even. It was as if her mind was somewhere else and she was distant from everyone, including me.

I was worried so I called the one person who knows her the best: her father. Sadly, Nikki didn’t answer but his voice mail gave me the same feeling that seeing Alex did: feeling that both of them are depressed about something.

“Hey, this is Nikki. I’m not here, I’m out for the day. Leave a message.”

Looking at Rhapsody showed me that he knew that his owner was depressed. The dog was aware that there was something wrong with Alex.

Maybe it had something to do with the fact that we’re going to see her mom. Every time I asked her about her, Alex just says that she doesn’t want to talk about it. Nikki’s the same way too. According to Tommy, Vince, and Mick, the subject of Alexei’s mother was a very sensitive one and those two do not like to talk about her much. I wonder why. She couldn’t be abusive because Alex was willing to go see her today. Maybe she’s very sick or something.

I don’t know.

“What do you think, Rhapsody,” I asked her Doberman, “Is there something wrong with both Nikki and Alexei Sixx?”

Rhapsody’s response was to just whine.

I took that as a yes.

After breakfast, I walked into her room to see that Alex had already showered and was dressed. She was wearing a pair of black jeans, a black tank-top covered by a dark green button up shirt, and was tying on a tie. Her hair was already dried so I assumed that she got out a blow-dryer. Anyway, she had her pretty strawberry blonde hair down in a braid with a bow keeping it in place. Alex looked good, yes, but she looked like she was going to a funeral or something.

“Do I need to dress up,” I asked as she was putting on her watch.

“No, you don’t have to,” Alex answered, “I just normally do today.”

“Oh, okay,” I said as I watched her put a necklace on.

Well, actually, attempt to put a necklace. She couldn’t get the clasp on so I pulled it out of her hands and helped her myself. “You could have asked me if you needed help,” I said, getting it done.

“Well, I’m stubborn that way,” Alex replied before she gave me a quick kiss on the cheek, “You should know that by now.”

I smiled, seeing some of the old Alex that I’m used to having around. I wrapped my arms around her slim figure, pulling her close to me. She smiled as she buried her face in my shoulder.

“I need to make a quick stop before we see my mom,” her muffled voice said.

“Okay, that’s fine,” I answered, kissing her forehead.

“Good, because I would have made you come with me to that stop anyway,” Alexei grinned as she got her keys.

That stop that she had to make was at a flower shop. Alexei had to get a bouquet of tiger lilies and was determined to get them. I sat in the passenger seat of her jeep, watching her pay for this large bouquet as I listened to some Bloc Party. Yeah, she decided to listen to them for this car ride and I had no real desire to protest.

“Okay, I got them,” Alex said as she placed the bouquet in the back seat, “Now we go see my mother.”

“What was your mother’s name,” I asked as she turned the ignition.

“Jenna Volkov,” was her answer, “She was half Russian.”

“Hence your name,” I grinned, remembering Vince saying that Alex was named after one of the last monarchs of Russia.

“She gave me the name of the last crown prince,” Alex snorted, “She’s named me after a guy!”

I stifled a laughed when she said that. In all honestly, I thought her name was feminine but I guess not.

“She named me after Alexei Romanov, the crown prince before the fall of the Romanov dynasty. Supposedly, he and one of his sisters, Anastasia or Tatianna, escaped before they were shot to death. I hear that he turned up somewhere in Romania as a school teacher who wrote in his will that he was Alexei Romanov. I don’t know.”

“Wow, you know a good amount of Russian history,” I said, in awe of that.

“I just happen to be amused by Russian history, especially the Romanov dynasty.”

Five minutes later, Alex pulled up to a cemetery parking lot. I looked around, confused, when I saw a Bentley parked not too far from where we were parked. Alex just looked at it as she got the bouquet from the back seat, “Oh, I guess Dad’s here.”

I just nodded as I followed her. Obviously, I was confused but I didn’t say anything. I just kept quiet until we saw her father, kneeling by a grave with flowers of his own. He, like his daughter, was dressed up in an all black attire which isn’t normal for him but it seemed a bit more formal that usual Nikki looked at us and smiled, “Came to wish your mother a happy birthday, Lex?”

“Yup and I got her a bouquet of tiger lilies,” Alex said, proudly.

“Her favorite flowers,” Nikki said, “Well, I’ll see you two tomorrow. Jacoby, take care of my daughter.”

I nodded as Nikki got up and walked off, leaving us there. Alexei laid the flowers and said to me, “My mom passed away when I was one. She got into a car accident when she was going to go see my dad play but obviously, she didn’t make it.”

So that’s why the topic of Alex’s mom was so sensitive to both Nikki and Alex. I felt horrible as Alex started telling her mom all the things that’s been going on. It was really saddening to see this. I mean, there was a lot of depression built up in her and yet she maintains to keep a happy face.

“And this is my boyfriend, Jacoby,” Alex said, looking up at me, “He’s really amusing.”

“Nice to meet you ma’am,” I said.

I saw a picture leaning against the tombstone. A closer look showed that it was a younger Nikki with a woman holding a baby who I could only assume to be a baby Alexei. The woman looked shockingly like Alex except she was paler. She was dressed up in hospital clothes while he looked like he just came back from a show. They all looked happy and excited. Nikki probably left it here as a tribute piece.

“I have that picture,” Alex said, getting up, “Apparently it was taken after I was born. It’s one of the few pictures I have of my mom.”

I looked at her and saw that there were a few tears falling so I wrapped my arm around her shoulder, holding her close to me. “It’s okay, Alex. Your mom would be so proud of you,” I said comforting her.

“Thanks for coming with me, Jacoby,” she said, looking at me.

“It was my pleasure to finally meet your mom.”

Alex nodded as we turned to leave but not before she said, “Bye, mom. We’ll be back later.”