Ocean of Emotion

My eyes burned. My throat was sore. After what seemed like days of sobbing, I'd finally cried myself dry. Either that or I was slowly about to get over the events of the past couple of days. My back was rested against the headboard of the bed myself and Josh slept in. The thin, itchy cover was balled up at the end of the bed. My skin was red and sore from me rubbing toilet paper on my face to soak up the salty tears.

"Okay now?" Sacha asked from beside me. Her eyes were watching me, the brown orbs filled with sympathy. The urge to slap her washed over me, but I ignored it. Violence wouldn't help me, and hitting Sacha wasn't going to let me go back in time and change what happened, so I decided not to bother.

Instead I just shrugged in answer to her question, because I didn't know if I was okay. Probably not. I'd just wallow in my own self pity and sorrow, give them the speech about becoming a nun or something.

"I'm going to die alone. I'm going to be a crazy cat lady, and all of the cats will be named after you, just so I can pretend your close to me, in cat form obviously. I'll smell of pee and have to eat cat food. So much cat food that I'll turn into a cat myself," I said, glumly. My voice was raspy from the sobbing.

"You can't turn into a cat by eating cat food, don't be so silly," Libby piped up, her eyes were focused on the puzzle page in a magazine, the end of a pen between her teeth.

"You don't know that Elizabeth! You don't know that for sure, or have you carried out an experiment? Have you feed Matt cat food?"

"No. But it's a well known fact that we can't change into animals. No wonder you got a big fat F in biology at school."

"I had other things to worry about at school."

"Like what?"

"The death of my beloved Peaches. Spots. Throwing up in Josh's lap. Joshua Franceschi was one big worry to begin with, and he still is now, damn it!"

"Some things don't change, Bliss. One thing that hasn't is the way you and Josh feel about each other. He still loves you, you still love him. You two need to talk, but you just won't. You always run away from your problems like it'll solve itself, but it won't. Hear him out and if you don't believe him, thats fine, but you haven't even heard his side of the story yet," Jenny explained.

"But you were the one who said - " I began.

"No," she cut me off, shaking her head, "I warned you of my suspicions, you jumped to the conclusion that he'd cheated when he came back covered in lip gloss kiss marks, with sex hair and his shirt ripped."

I nodded, she was right there. I had jumped to conclusions. But it had looked so obvious. It seemed to fit that he'd cheated on me with Heather. She'd asked Jenny about him, and if she got him drunk enough, maybe he wouldn't know what he was doing.

"Maybe, Josh was raped by some six foot five transvestite," Sacha suggested.

I shot her a dark look and pulled my knees up to my chest, resting my chin on them. "What should I do?"

"Okay," Libby put her magazine and pen down. "Do you love Josh? Do you still want to marry him? Do you trust him?"

"Yes, times three."

"Then find him, talk to him, kiss him, get that ring back on your finger and make sure you marry him, because Bliss, you two have been through far too much to throw it all away because some cheap tart tried to wedge her fat tangoed arse between you."

I nodded, catching sight of my sorry state in the mirror. I cringed slightly at my swollen eyes, red face, hair stuck up at all angles at my eyelashes all glued together with salty tears. "Well before I go anywhere near Josh, can someone please make me look half way decent?"

All of them jumped up, running around the room, picking up various pieces of make up, hair brushes and such. Libby was the only one seated, she rolled her eyes and picked up her magazine, carrying on with the puzzle she'd started. "He better take you back if you're going to this much effort."

"I hope so," I said, quietly, catching no one's attention.