To the Point of Obsession

I woke up early in the morning, to Doug shaking me.

"What?"

"J wants you."

I looked at him and got up slowly.

"He said now," Doug taunted, smiling playfully.

I glared at him and showed him the cut on my side. "Go do this to him and see how fast he is."

"Fine, fine."

I walked out to the living room, seeing the Joker sitting and watching TV. I looked at the TV and groaned. My face was on the screen, in the bedroom from Wayne's house when I called the Joker. "Fuck."

"Yeah, big booboo, huh?" the Joker asked, cocking his head to the side.

"Her most recognizable feature is her long, black hair. It's nearly past her rear. She is considered armed and dangerous, and an accomplice of the Joker. If you have any—"

The TV turned off, and the Joker looked at me. "Big booboo," he repeated, looking at me.

"You have any hair dye that's not green?" I asked, going to the bathroom.

The Joker thought a second and looked at me. "No."

"Can any of your guys cut hair?" I asked, looking at him hopefully. I wasn't letting him cut my hair.

"Yes, I hire gay men all the time, let me go get one," he said sarcastically. "Just call your friend," he suggested. "She's a cosmetologist, right?"

"She is not my friend. I'd rather have green hair than talk to her."

"You don't have to talk to her," he reasoned.

I sighed and sat on the counter. "Why should it matter if I have long hair, anyway? I'm not going to be out in public, right?"

Jack grabbed my phone from my pocket and called someone. "Yes, Danni? It's your old pal Jokie. I need you to come to do me a favor." I heard her yell some profanities at him. "I have the girl," he said, rolling his eyes. "No, I do." She said something else. "Who says I have Dahl…? I'm just kidding, I do, but honestly, you better come to the warehouse at the corner of Rawson and Wayne. And by the way, if you tell anyone, I will know, and everyone you've ever loved will die with you." He hung up and handed the phone back. "That's settled."

"I hate you," I said, turning to leave the bathroom. I had been looking for any hair dye, but all I found was green stuff.

"Do you, now?" he asked, grabbing my waist.

"I figured out the reason why you didn't want to sleep with me," I said, looking at him.

"Hm," he said, kissing me. "Do tell me, the suspense is killing me."

I tried getting away from him, but his arms grasped my waist tighter. "You're on your man-time-of-the-month."

He chuckled. "Your comfort was my only concern, doll."

"I'm comfortable now," I said, kissing him for the first time.

"I better go get some hair supplies," he said, letting go of me and walking away.

"Douche bag," I said, glaring at the back of his head.