Frankie Fever

Frankie's laugh was loud, clear and approving as I repeated the story of the other day to him. He clutched at his side with as he finished laughing, flicked his fringe out of his eyes and put a hand on the back of his head, running his fingers through his newly cut and spiked hair. He had his hair cut at the same time as me; he kept his fringe and had the rest cut shorter so he could spike it up. While this new style suited him really well, I preferred him with long hair.

"That's brilliant, Gerard," He exclaimed, snorting again as he thought about it.

I grinned and giggled along with him. It had felt so good to watch him flail about, trying to bowl with a scowl on his face. It felt even better to beat him by a mile. And Mikey had demanded a variety of different drinks which Dad had no choice but to buy when he saw my arched eyebrow.

Where was the cheating asshole right now? He was at parents evening with his darling wife, playing happy families. Dad had tried to get out of it by declaring that he had a friend he was gonna' meet up with. Did he get away with it? Nope. I had turned to him with a feigned expression of hurt and an imitation of his own sweet-cutesy sugar voice. 'What could possibly be more important than your child's education?'

And that's how Dad found himself being dragged into the building with a forced smile on his face and Mikey clutching one hand. I had waved them off with a sweet smile which changed to a demon-from-hell smirk when Dad looked over his shoulder at me. Frank had laughed at this story too.

"What bothers me the most is that he's getting away with it," I mumbled to Frank.

"Mm," He replied, focused on lighting a cigarette.

We were sitting side-by-side in a bus stop, watching the world travel by. I'd do that back in New York. Sit and watch the people, trying to work out what their story was. Was that a real smile or was she putting it on and about to return to an abusive husband? Was he off to get more alcohol to feed his disease? And then I used to wonder what people thought my story was.

I smiled and accepted a cigarette from Frankie.

"Mum's so blind. Why hasn't she caught him, yet?" I demanded, exhaling the smoke.

"I dunno'," He replied "But, then again, your Mom can be a bit blind some times, if you don't mind my saying so."

"Nah, it's true," I agreed "She likes to fool herself."

He nodded, taking a slow drag. I watched him do so. Doing things slowly made him sexier. Sometimes, he seemed to slow down as he walked when I was watching him. I knew it was just me imagining it but it still made him look amazing.

"And now he's so scared I'll tell her that he's trying to be my best pal!" I continued.

"Ew," Frankie cringed "I'd hate it if my Dad ever did that!"

"It's disgusting!" I exclaimed, jabbing my ciagrette out with a grind.

Frank put a hand on my shoulder, circling his thumb as he looked at me with a sympathetic expression. I sighed and let my head drop into my elbows which were propped up by my bent knees. What did I ever do to deserve such a screwed up family? All I wanted was a nice normal family! A Mom who was clean but not house-proud and didn't ignore problems. A Dad who was there to give me advice when I needed and to sneak off to get take out with when Mom produced one of her nasty home-recipes for dinner. A brother who could be my partner in crime without having to speak gibberish and who hung out with me not dressed like he was from star trek.

Was that too much to ask for?

"I know, dude," Frankie said softly "And I know you're angry. . ." He wavered.

I could tell he was a little uncomfortable from his hesitation.

Then he cracked a small sly smile.

"I got something for us."

A bottle of the good stuff was being held in front of me. I grinned a back at him and took the bottle for the first swig. I sighed in content and passed the bottle to Frank, resting my head against the bus shelter with a smile on my face.

"You know me too well, Frankie," I mumbled.

"Glad it's appreciated," He giggled, struggling to get up and holding a hand out "C'mon, let's go have some fun; that's what you need! There's a fair in town for the next few weeks!"

"Great," I grinned, taking his hand and letting him help me up.

I took another swig of the beverage and grinned to myself. Frankie lit up another cigarette and slipped his sunglasses on. It was starting to get dark. That sort of in-between stage when the sky's starting to darken but it's not quite dark yet.

"And on the way," He said with a smile "We can discuss methods of revenge that we can inflict on your Dad!"

I grinned straight back at the evil twinkle in his eye. And on the way to the fair we had great fun discussing all the evil things we could do. Some were believable and others were completely absurd. But what do you expect? Teenagers aren't always realistic. Some are and have completely matured and then there's the rest of us who let our imaginations run wild. Those are the best people.

"You've gone easy on him so far!" Frankie smirked as we approached the fair "I could help make things much worse!"

I blinked at him.

"How?" I questioned as we entered the fairgrounds and looked around at all the flashing lights

"Well," He began, chewing his lip "I could always sleep with your Mom!"

We were both silent for a second, looking at each other. Then we both cracked up laughing and Frankie handed me the bottle again.

"Then again, maybe not!" He spluttered.

But, I wouldn't put it past Frankie to do something that crazy.

He grinned and dragged me towards various rides. I liked hanging out here. You could forget everything and just throw your arms in the air while screaming with laughter. Everything would become a sweet blur of pumping music and flashing lights while you drank with your best friend. And maybe you'd look at your friends laughing face and consider kissing it. But then you'd realise you were too chicken to do it, no matter how much you wanted to.

Soon we started to feel a bit woozy after all the rides we'd been on so Frankie dragged me into one of those photo booth things, stuck a couple of dollars in and perched himself on my lap. He was sat on my lap.

"Come on, Gee," He encouraged "Smile!"

I smiled at the camera with him.

"Gerard, hold on to me!" He protested "I keep slipping!"

So I gingerly reached to put my hands on his waist. My hands hovered for a few seconds, seemingly frozen and too terrified to touch him. I bit my lip and told myself off sternly, ordering myself to move. It wasn't like he was asking me to kiss him, was it? I tried to move, I really did, but the brain and body seemed disconnected.

Frank sighed to himself and grabbed my hands, wrapping them around his waist. I blinked a couple of times to try and recover from where he'd made me jump.

Then I relaxed and smiled back at the camera.

* * *

"Oh, Gee, these are great," Frankie grinned, looking at the photos "I'm keeping these!"

He tore the strip in half, keeping the half with the photos of us making stupid faces or trying to look cool. He gave me the ones of us smiling sweetly. I smiled at them and pocketed them. They'd go on my wall when I got home.

We were now parked on a bench with the last of the beloved drink left, finishing it off between us. I had a cigarette between my forefinger and thumb, stretched out across the bench. Frankie was perched at the other end, fumbling through his pockets for his lighter.

He cursed when he realised he didn't have it on him.

"Why is my Dad such an ass, Frankie?"

"I dunno', Gee," He sighed "Some people just are."

I lifted my head to look at him and got the shock of my life. He was leaning closer to me, crawling up the bench to get closer to me. I felt my heartbeat pick up and was certain my eyes were gonna' pop out of my skull.

Closer still.

Was he going to kiss me?

Butterflies. Pesky butterflies swooping through my stomach as if their wings were on fire and they were flapping them as fast as possible to try and put the fire out. How long had I wanted him to kiss me? A fair few months now. I deserved this, surely! I deserved some kind of reward for not telling on Dad and for putting up with my unhealthy obsession with Frankie without acting on them. Now he was coming to me! Something I never though possible!

I reached to take the cigarette out of my mouth, ready for it. He reached out, taking my hand in his. And moved the cigarette back into my mouth. Then he leant closer and put the end of his cigarette against mine.

My stomach dropped in disappointment as he sat back up with a lit cigarette between his lips. He smiled and exhaled the smoke slowly into my face.

"Thanks," He said, blowing a little kiss at me.

"Welcome," I nodded, trying to hide my disappointment.

Frank sat back up again, slouched on the bench with the newly lit cigarette between his lips. He looked thoughtful for a couple of seconds, inhaling deeply and then slowly exhaling the smoke, not bothering with smoke rings.

I sighed and turned my head to look at the road and watch cars pass. I took another drag from my cigarette. I sighed out the smoke, the entire world knowing my disappointment surely.

"Do you think I'm a man-slut?" Frankie questioned thoughtfully.

I paused to think.

What's more important in life? The truth or love? You have to wonder these things! Is it better to be truthful or to be loving? Believe it or not, there's a difference! Love isn't necessarily based on the truth. And the truth isn't always based on love.

"No."