Unravel

As I walked little Bobby to his doorstep, I continued to think about Walter's words.

It was still a shock to know that he wanted me to risk my life by going beyond the wall. I still couldn’t remember the last time I was outside. The world seemed to foreign to me. Almost like I had never had any experiences out there at all. I knew that was exactly the way Bobby felt. He was born here, so he never was outside. Luckily, that meant he didn’t know what he was missing. Me, on the other hand, knows exactly what it was that was out there: freedom.

I took in a deep breath, kicking the pebbles as I went by. It felt a little unfair that everything was being left on my shoulders. Why couldn’t it have been someone else? Why not someone who wouldn’t mind being completely at risk for death and other things that could definitely happen out there? I wasn’t a risk taker. I never liked making decisions on my own.

What if they did come after us? We'd be cornered, the wall would block any chance of escaping. There would be no way to get out. We'd be trapped...

"Well, Dee?" Bobby tugged on the leg of my pants, looking up at me with curious eyes. I stared at him, peering into his eyes. It was hard to imagine never witnessing the cold, wild eyes and the murder that occured up and down the streets. Sometimes, I envied him. I wish I could still be as innocent, never knowing the things I learnt. "Dee, are you okay?"

I cleared my throat as I tried to catch up with reality, "Yeah, I'm fine. I was just - thinking. What did you ask?"

He watched me a while longer. Suddenly, he shrugged, "Nevermind. I have to get home anyway. My Mom will probably throw a fit if I don't get cleaned up before dinner." He took two steps forward before he turned back to me. "Bye, Dee." he smiled wildly before he took off in a run.

Watching him run off, I smiled. I remembered being that little, running home because I knew Mom would kill me if I wasn't home in time for dinner. I can still hear her yelling at me about responsibility and respecting other people. There was some reason she hated waiting for me. I still haven't quite figured it out. I would lie in bed, dwelling on it. Maybe, I thought, if I found out what bothered her so much, I could some how change her attitude about it. Mom, though, was a puzzle even then. She just makes me more confused now.

There was a tap on my shoulder and I jumped, completely lost in my thoughts. I spun around, prepared to lash out at whoever it was. I exhaled as I realized it was George.

"Dee, calm down. It's just me." He smiled as he shoved his hands into his pockets. His grin was so mischievous that it instantly brought back memories of when I first met him. It was first grade, before anything had happened with the Others.

"Hey, squirt." James, the biggest kid in class, leered over me. He was twice my size and quite intimidating.

I looked up with a shudder. Of all the kids in our class, I was the one who was scared by him the most. Not only that, but I was the only one he decided to pick on everyday. "Wha-what, James?" I said in a squeaky voice.

"You got any dessert today?" He smiled, his front teeth were missing. Sitting where I was, on the bottom row of the jungle gym, that made him even scarier. "I thought we had a deal that you'd give me your dessert. Where is it?"

"W-well, my mommy made it special. It's my birthday and she made me a special cupcake." I played with the hem of my pink dress, hoping he'd go away soon.

He laughed, "Good, I like cupcakes. Hand it over." He made a grab at my lunchbox.

I held onto it like my life depended on it. We pulled it between us like it was the rope in tug-of-war. Today, I refused to give into him, no matter how much he scared me.

Well, my being smaller than him didn't help. I lost my grip and, in the process, fell off the metal bar. I landed flat on my knees and felt the stones dig into my skin. Breathing heavily, tears welled up in my eyes. I touched my knees as I sat back and looked down at my hand. There were tiny spots of blood and seeing them, I began to cry harder till my breaths came out in sobs.

"Leave her alone." The new boy stepped up and stood beside me. I looked up at him, amazed at his bravery. "It's her cupcake."

"What are you gonna do about it?" James sneered. I cried again, knowing the new boy was going to get pummeled. "Huh?"

"This." The smaller boy jabbed the heel of his foot down on James' foot while his left hand came up and landed square into his stomach. James crumbled to the ground, letting go of my lunchbox. The boy picked it up and looked down at James with a smile. "Don't bother her anymore."

James stumbled to his feet, "I-I'm telling Miss. April on you." He ran off as fast as he could and disappeared through the doorway.

"I'm George." The boy smiled at me as he helped me to my feet. Once I was standing again, he handed me back my lunchbox. "Don't worry. I won't let him pick on you."

I sniffed and wiped my nose on my arm, "Thanks. My name's Deanna." I smiled, even though there were still tears running down my cheeks and blood drying on my knees. "Do you want a bite of my cupcake. My mommy made it."

"Sure." George smiled.

Needless to say, George got in trouble for beating up James. Ever since then, though, he said it was worth it. James got in trouble, too, and he never bothered me again. As long as George was around, James kept his distance.

"Sorry, George." I smiled weakly, still a little shaken up. My conversation with Walter didn't help much. I could still feel the memories of my worries in the back of my head. "I was just...thinking."

He smirked, "See, that's your problem. You think too much. You need to just let yout mind wander a bit. Like I do." He put a finger to his head and tapped slowly. "It's a bit relaxing."

I stared at him a bit, "Well, that's your problem. You don't think enough."

"Now, that's harsh." George looked at the ground, eyebrows furrowed. "What's got you so worked up anyway?" He asked, starting to walk.

"It's nothing. I was just talking to Walter, that's all." I looked at the ground and began walking beside George. With him, it's so hard to tell how much you should say. He could get worked up easily. I sighed and decided to just get it over with. "If something came up and I had to leave, would you go with me?" It was the best way I could think of bringing up the subject.

George walked silently, looking up at the sky. I wasn't use to him being this quiet. Usually, he would bound into a discussion without thinking twice. It was just his nature. "Yeah, I think I would. But, it depends on where you'd be going and why." He finally looked over at me, still looking confused, "Why? Did Walter say something?"

I shrugged, "He asked me if I'd be willing to look for new safeground, in case something happened with the Others. If something happened and we got attacked, we'd need someplace to go that's like Haventown."

Coming to a halt, George looked at me. "He asked you to go?"

"Yeah, that's what I was thinking." I went back to stand next to him. "I mean, look at me. I'm nothing special and I'm one of the weakest people I know. You'd be much better going."

He placed a hand on my shoulder as a serious look crossed his face, "Dee, you may be weak physically, but you're one of the strongest people I've met. And don't take that the wrong way. What I mean by it is that your beliefs and will power are so strong, you'd out do me any day." He smiled, gripping my shoulder. "But, as much as I believe that, I still think you're the last person he should have asked."

I smiled back at him. He was the only one who could get away with insulting me while trying to make me feel better. "Thanks, I guess. It's just I've been thinking about it. What if something does happen and we're stuck here with nowhere to go? It scares me."

"It's your decision, Dee. I know how I feel about it and I don't even have to think about it."

"How do you feel?"

He took a deep breath and exhaled as he face forward, "I can't imagine what would happen if we were attacked be the Others. So, if you decide, I'll go with you and back you up one hundred percent."

I couldn't help but smile as I wrapped my arms around him and squeezed tightly. "Thanks, George. You have no idea how much that helps."

Quickly, I said good-bye and picked up speed. There was just one last person I had to talk to and I pretty much knew what she thought.