Buried Myself Alive

*Gerard’s POV*

I kept my eyes on his as he leaned toward me. I could feel him pressed against my lips and his chest pushing against mine. His free hand gripping mine still, and I moved my hand to his neck. His skin was smooth, clean, and soft underneath my finger tips.

It was a small kiss. Nothing big, but it still stole my breath. Our eyes were still on each other for a moment longer before he moved his way through the doorway into the bedroom. I followed him in and sat on the unmade bed. I pushed the pillows against the wall to prop myself up.

I couldn’t keep my eyes off of his figure as he held onto his towel and searched through Quinn’s closet for something to wear. “I want to talk to you..”

I stayed where I was as he pulled out a red shirt with something on the front that I didn’t have time to catch. He held it to his chest to make sure it would fit him. He took a glance at me over his shoulder. “I just want to tell you.. Ugh. I have no clue at all how to even start.”

I bit my lip. I had a clue what he was going to say, but I doubted it woudl be that. He was too serious for it to be about me. I sighed thinking about how quickly he shot down the idea of us-

My thoughts were stopped as I felt the mattress shift, he was sitting on the corner. He was now fully dressed. I bit down hard on my tongue. How could I have missed a glimpse of-? I scooted myself so I was sitting next to him. I had to ask what was up with him. “What is it?”

He looked down and his hair shifted forward to hide his eyes. “I feel so, I don’t know. You don’t know anything at all about who I am. I mean, I’m scared.. I guess. I want to have it all out there. Now, I just want to get it all over with.”

I watched he was playing with his hands, he was nervous about this. It couldn’t be that be… I found myself remember the fight yesterday. I closed my eyes and wish none of it happened, but it did and it was my fault.

“I know what you’re like cause I’ve been where you are. Don’t act like you’re the only one with problems, okay? You don’t seem to know the half of it. Yeah, you’re parents kicked you out! At least at one point they loved you! At least your father cared about you at some point! At least you got a fucking childhood!”

“Frank, I don’t want you to-” He cut me off. “No. I need you to know, or we’re nothing. Just let me talk an-and don’t you dare stop me.”

I sighed, he wouldn’t listen to me right now if it even mattered. I understood though, he wanted it gone. I wish I could tell him more about all that happened to me, but I’m no where near ready for that. I doubt I ever will be.

“I guess I’ll start with her.. Yeah, that seems the best place.” He was talking to himself now. I had no clue about what or who.

I watched his chest fill with a deep breath of air. He was bent over, leaning down. His head was now resting on his hands and his elbows were on his knees. “Her name was Christina Iero…” I caught the was right away, but the next part I wouldn’t have guessed if I were dying.

“She was my mother.”