All Time Low and Cricket

Zack had sided with Alex. What kind of big brother is he? Seriously, the one time I need him to be all macho, big brother, and does all the stuff that usually makes me cringe and die, he sides with the guy! I’m telling you: worthless. I don’t even fucking know why. I haven’t spoken to him in days. It’s sort of a tacit agreement that we won’t talk about it, so my mom has no idea, although she is curious as to why Jack is over with Lanie all the time, but that’s another story.

“So, Lane, got any ideas on how to get back at Dip Shit?” I asked while we did chores at the barn, we would talk at home, but since Zack’s all “Team Ass Face” we have to talk at here or at school. But at school, we have to deal with Marti Muller, and she can not know about the whole “Alex Debacle”, so we fudge a little at school, and go on and on about how sweet, and nice, and fun New York was with Alex. What Marti doesn’t know won’t hurt her.

“Wellll,” she drawled. “Jack and I were watching What Happens In Vegas last night—What!” She broke off when she saw the face I was making.

“You and Jack are always together now!” I said rolling my eyes. And they were always together, it wouldn’t be long now before they started to repopulate like bunnies. And I would be left all alone. I wish I could meet someone I would click with like that!

“Anyway,” she said glaring at my sulking face. “You know when they ring the doorbell and punch Cameron Diaz's ex-boyfriend where the sun don’t shine? Yeah, I was thinking something like that.”

“Good plan. I like that!” I laughed. Then, we heard a squeal and a shriek of laughter.

“Snuggles! Fuzzy! James Bond! Quit that tickles!” Lanie and I both cracked up when we saw Jack on the ground playing with the kittens at the barn (ALWAYS TOGETHER!), they were climbing all over him and pawing at his hair.

“Oh God!” Lanie laughed hysterically, then she turned to me and said so sincerely it made me cringe: “Cricket, I’m so happy!” She was beaming, and I felt bad for all the bad things I had thought about them.

“I know Best Friend! I’m so super psyched for you!” I said sincerely throwing my arm around her shoulder and walking towards Jack laughing and giggling the whole way.

“Hey Moms hey!” I said when I walked in the laundry room/garage door. She rolled her eyes at my “slang” talk. It’s a teacher thing; she has to use perfect grammar all the time.

“Hello Cricket.” She sighed but laughed. I may be the straight “A” student, but I’m considered the obnoxious child. Only cuz Zack is gone all the time! I’m just vocal, and don’t let my parents get away with shit! Okay, I totally am the obnoxious child. I blame it on the fact that they gave me a stupid ass name. It is my revenge. You know, they gave their first born the normal name! You would think that they would need use the crazy name when they young and stupid, but no, it’s on the youngest! They were like 33 when I was born too! Totally unfair. Anyway, I’m done with my rant, it’s like once I get started, I have to finish. Wow, that was totally pervy now that I look back on that statement; I guess that makes me a closet whore!

“Whatcha makin’ for din-din?” I asked spinning around on the bar stool before stopping in front of her.

“Steak, mashed potatoes, corn, and just for you, mac and cheese.”

“Food of the gods.” I stated with a smile. “What’s the occasion?”

“Zack is having the boys over for dinner. They’re having a ‘band meeting.’ Should you invite Lanie over for Jack?” What. The. Hell. Oh hell no! I’m going to kill Zack!

“WHAT!” I screeched. “Why do they have to come over here! They always come over here, make them go somewhere else!”

“Cricket Elisabeth Merrick!” Yep. My middle name is normal. “What is wrong with you? You love it when all the boys are here!” I didn’t stick around to answer. I was booking it to Zack’s room to bitch him out.

“ZACK! Why would you invite Ass Face over here?” I screeched causing him to drop his weights that he loves more than life.

“By Ass Face do you mean Alex?” he asked serenely.

“No, I mean Lanie retard!” I said with sarcasm dripping off my words. Again Zack stayed calm. Which was pissing me off big time.

“Cricky, It’s just dinner. I don’t get what you’re all worked up about anyway, it wasn’t a big deal.”

“Oh. My. God.” I said horror-filled. “What is wrong with you? God, Zack! You’re such an asshole! I hate you!” Then, I stormed out of his room and called Lanie for backup.

Dinner was a house divided. On one side of the table: me, Lanie, and Jack, a.k.a.: Team Awesome. On the other side were Zack “Dumb Shit” Merrick, Alex “Ass Face” Gaskarth, and Rian “Leave Me Out” Dawson. Also known as Team Fucktard... minus Rian.

The whole night was me glaring down Zack and Alex, smiling flirtily at Rian, and whispering indiscreetly to Lanie and Jack. While Alex looked miserable, which cheered me up considerably (I had dressed extra, über hot for the occasion.), and Zack kept rolling his eyes like I was being just so immature. Asshole.

When I walked out of the dining room to do my AP Gov homework, Ass Face stopped me.

“Cricket! Wait! Please?” I could hear him begging behind me. I wasn’t going to stop, but he grabbed my arm and whorled me around. “Will you please just hear me out?”

“Why should I?”

“Because I can explain.” I laughed a short, barking laugh.

“Please, you broke my heart and you know it! So, just leave me alone, okay?” I said. I could feel tears pricking at my eyes again, but I wouldn’t let him see me cry again. He was dumbfounded. I could tell he was floundering for words because his mouth was opening and closing like a fish.

“Cricket—“ he began in a pleading tone.

“Save it... Ass Face.” Then I walked into my room and slammed the door shut.