Assigned to Fate
Poopies.
Their mission would not be an easy one, not by any stretch of the imagination, but we had confidence they would be able to fulfill our wishes. They were our last hope, and hope was a fading thing, increasingly hard to come by…
Tim Ferrell POV
On the screen in front of me was this brown, steaming misshapen egg-like, green glowing…. Poop?
“Wait, that’s a planet?” I exclaimed.
“Hehe, it looks like my poopies!” the other Tim piped.
Oneila spoke then. “Yes, that is Obsidis, our home planet. Many years of pollution discolored our skies and destroyed the atmosphere. Our people were in denial. They did not believe that our way of life might ever end. Your Hummers? Those would be considered environmentally friendly on my planet! Only in the last couple years has the ruling family even started to take action. Our people are still in denial. They think it has to do with the terrible disease, a secret government project gone wrong, that has left only half of our original population alive. And many would say it is better to be dead. But we can’t die. We are stuck. It is constant pain, this strange disease. We have searched throughout our galaxy, and your planet seems to be the only one that has developed a cure for something closely related to our artificial pathogen. Of the billions on your planet, we chose you because of your strong natural immunity and likelihood of acceptance of our culture.”
Andy had been gazing at her the whole time, smiling and nodding like the brainless schlub he had become since boarding this ship.
“What disease is this we’re dealing with exactly? Something so deadly as to kill off half your population seems a bit… DANGEROUS, doesn’t it?!” I asked, not really excited about the idea of being killed by some mutant disease on the planet of some zombie-like aliens.
“Not to you. You refer to it as the… umm… common cold?” Oneila responded.
“You want us to cure the cold? That’s impossible! If you have a cold, you just sit in bed a few days and buy tons of tissues, and then you’re better. There is no cure for the common cold!” I ranted.
There was that knowing smile, same one my kindergarten teacher had given me after I chucked an apple core at a kid on the playground, like I didn’t know what I was doing. Well, for her information, I freakin’ did! That brat had stolen MY orange crayon during coloring time! Nobody messes with my crayons, especially not orange ones. So I hit him in the square in the head with an apple core. Needless to say, I certainly did not appreciate the knowing smiles of teacher-like ladies.
“But you can. When was the last time any of you can recall having a cold?”
I thought back, trying to remember. My brother was always the one catching the cold. Then I’d get the flu and my vomit always seemed worse than his used tissues, so Mom would send him off to school with the sniffles. I can’t remember being the sneezy one myself though.
We looked at each other, each trying to recall the last cold we’d had. Convy spoke up “I was sick last week! Remember? And then the bathroom in the bus broke down!”
“That was because you had diarrhea and forgot to flush so many times that the whole thing clogged! That wasn’t a cold! You just had too many fish tacos!” I yelled yet again. Being kidnapped by aliens had affected my personality for the worse. Intriguing… Or maybe outer space has made my bandmates more idiotic.
Andrew POV
Her voice! That beautiful voice! The more she spoke, the more I wished Tim would shut up and let her speak. This was her, my love, that I thought I had lost, thought she had died in the terrible car crash four years ago, but here she was before me, brought back from the dead. It didn’t matter to me that this didn’t necessarily make sense; I just had this feeling, this strange assuredness that it was her. As I looked closer at her face, I could see the features of my beloved, worse for the wear but still beautiful. If she turned sideways, then I’d be able to see the little mole next to her left ear. Just need to make her look at Marshall. Hmm…
“Mushpot! Where are your pants?” I shrieked loudly.
“Not again!” he wailed, moving his hands to cover his very existent pants. Weird. But she looked over at him, and the mole was there! It was her! It had to be.
Tim Ferrell POV
Yep, definitely more idiotic.
Tim Ferrell POV
On the screen in front of me was this brown, steaming misshapen egg-like, green glowing…. Poop?
“Wait, that’s a planet?” I exclaimed.
“Hehe, it looks like my poopies!” the other Tim piped.
Oneila spoke then. “Yes, that is Obsidis, our home planet. Many years of pollution discolored our skies and destroyed the atmosphere. Our people were in denial. They did not believe that our way of life might ever end. Your Hummers? Those would be considered environmentally friendly on my planet! Only in the last couple years has the ruling family even started to take action. Our people are still in denial. They think it has to do with the terrible disease, a secret government project gone wrong, that has left only half of our original population alive. And many would say it is better to be dead. But we can’t die. We are stuck. It is constant pain, this strange disease. We have searched throughout our galaxy, and your planet seems to be the only one that has developed a cure for something closely related to our artificial pathogen. Of the billions on your planet, we chose you because of your strong natural immunity and likelihood of acceptance of our culture.”
Andy had been gazing at her the whole time, smiling and nodding like the brainless schlub he had become since boarding this ship.
“What disease is this we’re dealing with exactly? Something so deadly as to kill off half your population seems a bit… DANGEROUS, doesn’t it?!” I asked, not really excited about the idea of being killed by some mutant disease on the planet of some zombie-like aliens.
“Not to you. You refer to it as the… umm… common cold?” Oneila responded.
“You want us to cure the cold? That’s impossible! If you have a cold, you just sit in bed a few days and buy tons of tissues, and then you’re better. There is no cure for the common cold!” I ranted.
There was that knowing smile, same one my kindergarten teacher had given me after I chucked an apple core at a kid on the playground, like I didn’t know what I was doing. Well, for her information, I freakin’ did! That brat had stolen MY orange crayon during coloring time! Nobody messes with my crayons, especially not orange ones. So I hit him in the square in the head with an apple core. Needless to say, I certainly did not appreciate the knowing smiles of teacher-like ladies.
“But you can. When was the last time any of you can recall having a cold?”
I thought back, trying to remember. My brother was always the one catching the cold. Then I’d get the flu and my vomit always seemed worse than his used tissues, so Mom would send him off to school with the sniffles. I can’t remember being the sneezy one myself though.
We looked at each other, each trying to recall the last cold we’d had. Convy spoke up “I was sick last week! Remember? And then the bathroom in the bus broke down!”
“That was because you had diarrhea and forgot to flush so many times that the whole thing clogged! That wasn’t a cold! You just had too many fish tacos!” I yelled yet again. Being kidnapped by aliens had affected my personality for the worse. Intriguing… Or maybe outer space has made my bandmates more idiotic.
Andrew POV
Her voice! That beautiful voice! The more she spoke, the more I wished Tim would shut up and let her speak. This was her, my love, that I thought I had lost, thought she had died in the terrible car crash four years ago, but here she was before me, brought back from the dead. It didn’t matter to me that this didn’t necessarily make sense; I just had this feeling, this strange assuredness that it was her. As I looked closer at her face, I could see the features of my beloved, worse for the wear but still beautiful. If she turned sideways, then I’d be able to see the little mole next to her left ear. Just need to make her look at Marshall. Hmm…
“Mushpot! Where are your pants?” I shrieked loudly.
“Not again!” he wailed, moving his hands to cover his very existent pants. Weird. But she looked over at him, and the mole was there! It was her! It had to be.
Tim Ferrell POV
Yep, definitely more idiotic.
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I horribly terribly apologize for taking so long. And after taking so long, it being so short. Please enjoy?