Keep the Closet Door Closed

Jasper's Point of View
Finally, I felt my molecules settle. Every atom felt a bit suffocated but not in the bad way. It felt warm; cozy to have a body again. I was truly alive once more. It was a vaguely familiar sensation- as if I'd woken up after days of sleep and walked into the sunlight.

Suddenly, Annabell's screaming and banging on the closet door rand through my ears and I became fully aware of the situation. I stole Anthony's body- Well, not exactly; he gave me his body. It didn't make the idea sound any bit more pleasing. This was not supposed to happen. It went all wrong.

"Someone! What's going on?!" Annabell pleaded desperately from the closet. I stood, still not used to the feeling of my new legs. I walked over to the closet and opened the door, unsure of what was next to happen. She immediately fell into me, holding on to me tightly and kissing me.

"Jasper. Thank God." she breathed. Then, she paused and her eyes grew wide. Panicked, she asked, "Where's Anthony?" frantically searching the room. I was confused. I had Anthony's body but she still saw me as her Jasper.

I turned and searched for Anthony's body. Did I not take it? Am I really still her Jasper? Just a ghost? Sickly relieved, I his that his body was not in the room, no where. His blood still painted the bland carpet and I felt immediately ill again for the eighth time this night. I really did have his body. I was him now. For whatever reason, Annabell still knew me as myself. I didn't understand.

"That ghost- the good one- h-he isAnthony. He took his b-body. Anthony is dead." a voice whispered to my left. I'd forgotten Cyndy was still here, sitting in the corner in a ball. Her eyes were wide as she rocked back and forth. "Oh, Lord, this is insanity!" she cried to her God, throwing her hands over her face frantically.

I turned to see Annabell. Her face was calm but her voice wasn't. "Anthony is dead." she choked, near tears. "Jasper, you have a body." she added and attempted a smile. Then, her face contorted into a distraught expression again. "But Anthony is dead." she repeated, gravely. She fell to her knees and began to cry hysterically.

I quickly wrapped my arms around her. "Shh. Its okay.." I soothed, not knowing what to say. How could this possibly be okay? Her friend died and I inhabited his body! I could tell that she was struggling to feel the correct emotion: happiness for my life or sadness for Anthony's death? She just hung on to me, allowing me to hold her, and cried.

Cyndy stood up and, hesitantly, made her way over to us. She leaned down and whispered to Annabell, "Anthony would have wanted you to be happy." Immediately, Annabell stopped crying. She pulled away from me slightly, her wet face glistening in the dim light of the dorm. Her eyes looked as if they were begging for an answer; for clarification.

"He'd want you to be happy. He'd want you to be with Jasper and to let him go. Don't cry. Let him go." Cyndy said in response to her expression. Annabell looked as if her questioning eyes had been given an answer she knew but didn't want to hear. She nodded, wiping her tears away. "Thank you, Cyndy." she whispered, trying to regain control of her unstable voice.

"But we need to throw him some kind of funeral. Just us three- no one else will know he's gone." Annabell said, already making plans; already hiding her emotion again. All of the progress had been lost. She was trying to block out the pain again. "Jasper, you have to pretend to be Anthony for the rest of the year. Then you graduate and you can be whoever you want to be but, for now-"

"I know. I understand." I replied, worried about her still demeanor. Cyndy sighed. "I should leave now- Leave you two alone." she said and left. We both watched her leave in silence, not knowing what to say.

"Annabell," I whispered. "Open up to me."