Sleeping Sickness

But I don't need to believe in something that won't save my sanity

I woke up before Brian and quickly crawled out of bed. I grabbed a pair of bermuda shorts and a black Megadeth t-shirt from my closet, and matching black undergarments from my dresser. I walked to the bathroom and quietly closed the door before locking it. I tossed my clean clothes on the counter and let out a small yawn.

I rubbed my eyes before I pulled off my clothing and stepped into the shower. I turned the tap so the temperature was a quarter away from being all hot water. I felt the goosebumps on my skin as the first pellets hit my body, waking me up a little more.

I stepped out of the shower when I was done my usual routine and pulled a thick, large towel around my body and a smaller one around my head to help soak up the moisture from my thick, long hair. I dried myself off before pulling on my clothes. I turned on the exhaust fan to soak up the moisture from the room as I pulled the towel off my head. I quickly ran my brush through my hair before plugging my hair dryer in and turning it on.

When my hair was dry I put everything away and tossed my towels in a hamper before opening up the door to the hallway and making my way to the kitchen. I sat down at the breakfast bar with a bottle of water and looked through a guitar magazine that was in front of me. I got half way through the magazine with reading every article before there was a soft knock at the door. I stood up from the stool I was occupying and made my way to the front door.

I was a little surprised to see Nicole on the other side, though by the soft knock I should've known instantly who it was. My mind was in a whole different world. Nothing felt right anymore.

"Hey Jase," she smiled softly.

"Hey," I smiled in return and stepped to the side so she could come inside.

She hesitated for a moment, "um, where's Brian?"

I raised an eyebrow momentarily, "he's sleeping."

She nodded her head once, "do you want to go for a walk, maybe?"

"Not really," I replied, honestly. "What's this about?"

She let out a soft sigh, "it's about him and I don't feel comfortable talking about it when he can wake up and hear us talking at any moment."

I hesitated before I slipped on a pair of my vans that were beside the door. I grabbed a plain black hoodie that was hanging up; taking notice that Nicole had a sweater on as well. I stepped outside before closing the door behind me.

Nicole began to lead us down the driveway, past our cars and to the sidewalk. I waited to see what way we were going and then fell into step beside her as she turned right and headed towards the ocean.

We stayed quiet the entire ten minutes it took us to get to the beach, and the five minutes it took us to get to our regular spot and settled down.

“I want you to confront him,” Nicole finally spoke, but kept her gaze fixed on the horizon of the ocean in front of us.

“What?” I asked, my eyebrows furrowing as I turned my head to the left to study her face.

“I want you to confront Brain, Jasey. I want you to tell him what he’s doing to you.” Nicole finally turned her face; it was void of all emotion.

I stayed quiet for a few minutes, trying to figure out how to respond to her out-of-the-blue request. I was aware about how concerned she was, but this seemed to come out of nowhere.

“Where did this come from?” I finally questioned.

It was Nicole’s turn to be quiet for a few minutes, as she thought about what to say next. “I saw your body yesterday Jasey, I know that Brian isn’t hurting you by hitting you.” She turned to look at me, her eyes burning in hatred. If I didn’t know her better, I would’ve thought her look was directed towards me. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I couldn’t. I tried, but I just couldn’t. You don’t understand how it makes me feel, Nicole. You have no idea how it makes me feel as a person, to have to admit that my fiancé hurts me that way.” I bit my lip, trying to keep the tears that were drowning my eyes in place. I didn’t want to spill tears over this again.

She nodded her head and took a deep breath. “I’m giving you two options Jasey. Either you tell Brian, or I will.”

My muscles stiffened and I could’ve sworn that my blood froze in place. “Wh-why would you do that?”

“I am not going to sit around and let him do this to you Jasey! You’re so god damn lucky I haven’t done anything to that piece of shit yet!” Nicole stood up, and started to pace in front of me. She squeezed the bridge of her nose with her thumb and index finger. “Please tell me you understand where I’m coming from Jasey. You’re my best-friend in the entire world; I’m just trying to protect you. I’m trying to keep you safe, just like you would do for me.”

I nodded my head, letting out a deep breath that I wasn’t aware I had been holding. “I understand, I just don’t think I’m capable of confronting him.”

“You’re capable of doing anything Jasey, you are the strongest girl I know. If you don’t want to be by yourself, then you just have to tell me and I will be right there holding your hand. I just want you safe.”

I slowly stood up, dusting the sand off the back of my shorts as I did so. “Okay. I’ll try.”

A small smile slowly made its way on Nicole’s face, before she pulled me towards her in a tight embrace. “You can do it, Jase. I know you can,” she whispered in my ear softly.

I grabbed her hand as I pulled away. She gave me a quick smile before we started walking towards my house, the walk back feeling twice as long.

-

“Are you sure you don’t want me there?” Nicole asked, as we stood outside my front door. I nodded my head and smiled at her. She gave me a reassuring smile in response and a tight hug.

She waited for me to walk inside and close the door behind me before she turned around and walked to her car.

I kicked off my shoes and walked towards the living room. I felt my body fall against the couch and slowly sink into the cushions. I closed my eyes, thinking of what I was going to do.

“Hey babe, where’d you go?”

I opened my eyes to see Brian standing five feet in front of me, in his boxers and still shirtless. He still looked half asleep and completely innocent.

“Brian,” I began, “we need to talk.”

I watched the colour drain from his cheeks as he sunk into the chair behind him.

“What do we need to talk about?” He looked exactly how I felt, and it made me feel physically ill.

My voice cracked, “Synyster Gates.”