Freshman Year

October 20, 2008.

Jenny is really pissing me off. No matter how much I tell her to keep out of my grill, she won't. I don't like physical contact. Especially when I'm not happy with you. She keeps asking why I don't like to be hugged. I tell her that I've never liked it and she keeps asking why. She thinks I need some love. I really don't want to be loved right now. I don't get why she can't just take no for an answer. I also don't like that she keeps trying to do that arm lock thing with me.

After school, on the bus, I was listening to Hum Along. The lyrics kind of meant something to me.
You'll never hear this song
You'll never see the movie in my head
But you infest my sleep, and your figure creeps
Through my wall and hums above my bed
I know your name, and that you're photogenic and tall
But I've never heard you talk
And there's something about you
That stabs me right through

It reminded me of Carlos. I've never talked to him. He really is photogenic and tall. I've also dreamed about him before. I would have wrote about it if I could remember it all. He also can't read minds.

When I got home, I decided to tell Carlos that I like him. I really didn't want to like him because he's been a real douche to me. He had me ask out both of my friends for him after he said he would totally go out with me.

Could you please hate me right now?
What
Could you hate me for now, please?
Why?
Cause. Um. I forgot.
Lol ok
Sorry. But yeah. It was a good enough reason.
Oh I'm sure
It wasss. I just took a nap and forgot it all.
Lol
I do remember something about my ipod. I just don't wanna have to go through every song on there to remember that thing.
He didn't reply for a while. I was fake forgetting what I knew I would t3ell him. I finally got ebough courage to tell him what I wanted.
AHA! I rememberr. I want you to hate me because I like you and really don't want to.
Awhhh, why not
Causee when I like people, it just turns out badd
Oh sorrry why do you like me?
That's the problemmm. I dunno.
Haha your funny :)
...
I mean you act funny
Ughh
I'm sorry
You don't even know mee, is it just because I'm cute or something
Gahh! That's the problemmmmmm. That's why I want you to hate me. And its not just cause you're cute. I'd probably feel the same if you changed.
Awh you're cute lol
I'm not going to hate you
Awhh. Fine thenn lol
Hahaha
Lol. I just remembered why I even wanted to do thatt. I was listening to Hum Along.
Do what
Tell you I like youu
Awhh
Who's it by
Ludo. They're my best friendsss
Lol you have a lot of best friends
I do. But if it's a band, they're only my best friends if I've met them.
Hahaha
I infest your sleep?
Whatt? Omagah. No
I don't dream often.
Hahhahahahahaha
Lol. I'm trying to play one of their songs on my gee-tar
Geeetar lol
Yesss. I play the gee-tar. Guitars are for amateurs.
Write me a song
Nahh. I'm horriblee. I can barely play what I'm trying to learn right noww
Haha
I can barely do the beginning
Ack
Its sooperr easy, too.
Man, practicee
I dooo. I just need someone to actually show me how to do it, or else I can't do it.
YESS! I totally just got the beginningggg!
Woooot
Whooooo -insert crazy coughing here-
Lmao
I'm getting sickk
Take some meds
Lol. We don't have anything in my housee
Get the rents to get some
My dads in arizona and my moms sleeping.
Wake her upp.
My mom bitches at me when I wake her upp
Well you sick
Mhm. I'm gonna eat my mums cough drops. They taste like candyy
Yum
They're fruit punch flavor
Oh yummy
Mhmm.

October 21, 2008

I was kind of scared. Carlos might be on again and want to talk to me. He wasn't on all day. Shavonne wanted me to work with him on our buisiness tech thing.