What a Wonderful Caricature of Intimacy
Unconscious
I rushed home and went straight to my room. I collapsed on my bed, hyperventilating and crying. I couldn't believe I had been so stupid. I was going to lose Ryan now. Oh, God. I can't lose Ryan. I love him so much. I know he can easily get rid of me, but I can't easily forget about him.
I couldn't sleep that night. Well, I may have fallen asleep for a few minutes, but I spent basically all night worrying. I didn't hear anything from Ryan. I wondered if he knew that people knew now. No doubt everyone would know. When the sun finally rose, my mom came to check on me. I told her I wasn't going to school. That I didn't feel good. Lucky for me she bought it. I'm sure I looked like shit at the moment anyways. I had bought myself a day.
That night, I still hadn't heard anything from Ryan. But I was able to sleep. Even though with every passing hour my walls drew closer. I woke up the next morning, ready to go to school. Ok, I wasn't ready, but I needed to see what damage had been done.
I dragged my feet in getting ready, and by the time I got to school, everyone was there. I walked inside, everyone stopping what they were doing to look at me. Then the whispering started. I ignored it and moved on. My breath caught in my throat when I saw Ryan. The noise surrounding me dimmed. He was staring at me, emotionless. I forced a slight smile, but he turned and walked away. He was mad. Furious. He didn't look it to anyone else, but I knew he was mad. And he had every right to be. I became aware of everyone talking around me. Of everyone's eyes pointed at me. And aware that my walls were closing. I hadn't been able to free myself. I had trapped myself. I guess my walls didn't represent my secret. I wasn't able to figure out what they mean because I was finding it difficult to breathe. And I was falling. Towards the floor. Unconscious.
I couldn't sleep that night. Well, I may have fallen asleep for a few minutes, but I spent basically all night worrying. I didn't hear anything from Ryan. I wondered if he knew that people knew now. No doubt everyone would know. When the sun finally rose, my mom came to check on me. I told her I wasn't going to school. That I didn't feel good. Lucky for me she bought it. I'm sure I looked like shit at the moment anyways. I had bought myself a day.
That night, I still hadn't heard anything from Ryan. But I was able to sleep. Even though with every passing hour my walls drew closer. I woke up the next morning, ready to go to school. Ok, I wasn't ready, but I needed to see what damage had been done.
I dragged my feet in getting ready, and by the time I got to school, everyone was there. I walked inside, everyone stopping what they were doing to look at me. Then the whispering started. I ignored it and moved on. My breath caught in my throat when I saw Ryan. The noise surrounding me dimmed. He was staring at me, emotionless. I forced a slight smile, but he turned and walked away. He was mad. Furious. He didn't look it to anyone else, but I knew he was mad. And he had every right to be. I became aware of everyone talking around me. Of everyone's eyes pointed at me. And aware that my walls were closing. I hadn't been able to free myself. I had trapped myself. I guess my walls didn't represent my secret. I wasn't able to figure out what they mean because I was finding it difficult to breathe. And I was falling. Towards the floor. Unconscious.
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If anyone kind of recognizes the scene, you'll know it's what happened in the prologue..Just a little different obvioulsy. I didn't want to rewrite it word-for-word.Oh, and yesterday before I updated, this story had 4 stars. I got a comment on the story, and it had jumped to 6 stars :] That makes me extremely happy.
Comment??
~Sally