What a Wonderful Caricature of Intimacy

"How long are we going to have to on like this?"

We were sitting on the couch, Ryan reading a book and me watching him. Ryan looked up from the book he was reading to look at me.

"Going on like what?" Ryan asked.

"You know..." I said, making hand gestures. Ryan shook his head, not understanding. I sighed. "You can be so dense sometimes. I'm talking about our secret."

"Oh," Ryan gave me a stern look. "We're not discussing that here."

"Fine," I said. I looked down at my hands and picked at my fingernails.

"Hey," Ryan said. I looked up at him. "Everything will be fine, ok?"

I nodded my head. Ryan returned to his book. It didn't stay silent for long because I had another question I needed to ask.

"Ryan?" I said.

"What?" he asked, looking up at me again.

"Did we really have to get Brendon involved in this?" I asked. It was Ryan's turn to sigh now.

"For fuck's sake, Jenny," he said, sounding slightly angry now. "We can't talk about this right now."

"I know," I said. "I'm sorry."

I pulled my legs to my chest and rested my head on my knees. I know I shouldn't have been asking these questions now, but I couldn't help it. Now I felt bad. I didn't like making Ryan mad. Ryan sighed again.

"No," he said. He set his book down and moved closer to me. He moved my legs away from my chest so he could get closer to me. "I'm sorry."

"You shouldn't appoligize," I said. "I shouldn't have asked those questions right now."

"It's ok," he said. "The most I can say is that it is neccesary for Brendon to be involved."

I nodded my head.

"Don't worry about it though," Ryan said. "Everything will be fine."

I smiled at him.

"I know," I said.

"Good," Ryan said, leaning forward to kiss me softly. "Just trust me ok?"

"I already do," I said.