Desolate Love

Harry's P.O.V... (Still)

“Really?” She asked not believing that I would ask her such a thing. She moved out from behind the counter, her black hair falling in her face the same way that Suki’s does.

“I promise.” I answered, yeah you probably think that’s weird for me to say but she got my drift and came up to me giving me a hug.

“When is it?” She asked leaning her head on my chest, I put my head on hers.

“In about three hours, so are you coming?”

“Absolutely, let me ring my substitute and we’ll be one. Alright?” This was fine by me. Just as long as we get there then I’m fine.

Suki’s P.O.V….

We had finally entered the stadium, where My Chemical Romance were performing and I was ecstatic seeing as I knew that I would be meeting the best people in the world! David had his arm round me and Abi was with me all the time we were talking laughing and having loads of fun but something was missing with out Harry here and I couldn’t put my finger on it.

Around twenty minutes after we got there Harry finally arrived and he had someone with him that I wasn’t expecting to see, a girl. Harry looked awful when I saw him walking this way with a bag in one hand and the girl’s hand in the other, he looked ill, very pale and like he hadn’t slept in weeks. It broke my heart to see him like this but then when I took in what the girl looked like she was very like me. Black hair, blue eyes, black trousers but she had something I wanted, a band t-shirt on. Bitch! I then looked at what Harry was wearing, his black jeans that he always wore but they were hanging loosely off of him, his t-shirt that he loved with MCR on it. Again it was hanging off of him, this wasn’t right he hasn’t been eating properly for ages by the looks of it. The tears started to get to my eyes in which I let my hair fall in front of my face. This wasn’t what I wanted to see, I had wanted to see him happy smiling and full of happiness instead he seemed to be taking my happiness and shoving it down the drain.

Abi must of seen my uneasiness and came over to me saying to the boys that we needed a toilet break, she took me into the loo where I sat crying.

“Why does he look like he’s killing him-self Abi?” I sobbed into the toilet roll, I must admit the toilets weren’t clean and people were smoking in here. “Does he want to torture me? Does he feel like me seeing him like that will give me pleasure? It disgusts me. Please tell me how long he’s been like that?” I asked falling too pieces. Why was I getting so worked up at seeing Harry like that? I mean I don’t have feelings for him anymore do I? David said that Harry didn’t bother coming to see me when I was ‘asleep’ and Abi just likes to avoid the situation where we’re talking about it so I’m puzzled I mean I haven’t seen him for over a week and… Does he expect me to act like this? Does he even still like me?

I fight the tears until I stop crying. I’m not, I mean it, I am not falling in love with Harry and I won’t. He doesn’t care about me anyway. David on the other hand was there for days holding my hand, talking to me. He loves me, he fucking loves me that’s more than anything Harry has ever done. He’s been there for me since my dad was abusing me and my family. He was there when no-one else was and for that I am truly in dept of him. I put on some eyeliner and exited the toilets with Abi by my side. She hasn’t said anything for a few minutes, I wonder what she’s thinking?

I walk up to David and put my arm round him, I can’t be asked to act shy around Harry and whilst he’s with some total loser I’m not talking to him.

Harry’s P.O.V…

I finally arrived at the gig and we went in and my date had her fringe covering half of her face exactly the way I liked it. When I saw the gang I was relieved but when I saw Suki’s face she was shocked that I looked the way I did. I was shocked I hadn’t meant to stop eating normally but I suppose that’s the way life goes sometimes, where you can’t get over something and it plagues your brain. I know that mine has come back. The nightmares that had long since gone have come back and this time I’m scared to go to sleep. I am so scared you cannot imagine, it’s almost like the world has become deserted and I’m the last soul survivor who is dying slowly and painfully. I can’t help this, I feel so tired, I swear if it wasn’t for how loud the crowd is I would be asleep where I am. I think I’m a walking Zombie, Shawn of the dead anyone?

Suki’s P.O.V…

I stayed cuddled up to David for the next hour of the gig. I didn’t feel safe away from him because Harry was just on my mind and if he could see how much he was destroying me then hopefully he will stay away from me. My Chemical Romance were having a break and so David grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the side of the stage. The security guard went to stop us but David waved the V.I.P tickets at him and he let us go with out so much as a word. I held David’s hand quite firmly but I was scared and nervous to be meeting the best band in the world, I mean wouldn’t you be?

I let my fringe fall in front of my face as David pulled me into the guys lounge around room, you know the one … What ever! I peered slowly out from my veil at the men who were lounging around on sofas and over by the coffee machine … Typical! I let a small giggle out and that’s when the guys noticed us. Ray, Bob and Mikey who were on the sofa looked at me strangely and then noticed David, they smiled. Frank and Gerard who were talking over by the Coffee machine looked round and then continued talking for a brief second whilst they waited for they’re coffee’s too come. I bit my lip hard to stop myself laughing too much and look like a total nutter, I know I am one but its better to be on the safe side.

“Hey guys how have you been?” David said letting go of my hand and walking round to sit on the other sofa. For a second I was left on my own but I soon followed and sat down next to him. Why was it that I felt hopeless if Harry left me but it felt normal if David did. Ahh I’m bringing him up again! I tell you I’m annoyed at my-self.

“We’ve been good, David, how have you been?” Bob answered for the whole group. He sat crossed legged on the sofa next to Ray. We had walked in on them all talking and so they’re was an uneasy silence that had needed to be broken but for some reason all I could think about was the fact that David wasn’t into this music and so why was he friends with these awesome dudes?

Am I thinking too much? Am I deliberately trying to make everything lead back to Harry cause it seems too. *sighs* I want to stop thinking. Why is this so hard?

I continued looking at my feet as I sat there occasionally looking up at the guys who seemed to look at me.

“Who’s this David?” They asked after a few minutes. I could feel him fidget on the sofa next to me.

“This is Suki, she’s fifteen and she loves your band. She’s a huge fan and is usually a lot more talkative but I suppose she’s a bit speechless.” He laughed a bit afterwards. I gave him a pissed off look from under my veil of hair but that was only cause he was laughing at my shyness.

“Hello Suki, it’s nice to meet you.” Gerard said. I looked out from under my hair at him and smiled. I actually smiled at Gerard Arthur Way!

David’s P.O.V…

I sat on the couch with the girl of my dreams next to me. Should I ask her the question or should I go to the shops first? I can’t make up my mind. Should I do it now or later? Later, I think, over dinner.

Well at least my plan is working, Harry isn’t taking Suki away from me, in fact she seems like she doesn’t want to be anywhere near him. Which is good but the only trouble is he’s still around….

Harry’s P.O.V…

The gig was going awesomely, well for everyone else, don’t get me wrong I was having a good time but I just wasn’t myself. For some reason my sister kept giving me the evils, it was only two minutes into the break so naturally once Suki and David had disappeared Abi decided that she would come and have a go at me. She walked over to me and Claire and basically asked for a word with me alone. She looked fuming mad with me, what have I done wrong? I apologised to Claire before walking after Abi away from where we were standing, holding a bag in my right hand.

Abi’s P.O.V…

When this break comes, and it will, I will be so happy to go over there and rip my brother to shreds. I bet he doesn’t know how much pain he is causing Suki, the bastard!

Finally the break came and I was happy, I watched Suki and David walk away through the crowds together. I was happy for her as long as she knew what she was getting herself into.

I turned and walked over to Harry, the smile wiped off my face, I went and dragged him by the arm away from the girl he had brought with him.

“I need a word.” I mumbled loud enough for him to hear. We wandered to a place a little further from where we were usually standing in the crowd, I noticed that he had brought a bag with him in his right hand like a prize possession of his.

“What did you want to talk about?” He asked me a little puzzled.

“Are you seriously asking me that?” I asked absolutely at the end of my tether. “Could you be anywhere nearer walking off a cliff or going blind? You are so dumb sometimes Harry. I know you have your own problems but when you become someone else’s problem then I have to worry. You need to sort your self out. You’re hurting me, mum, dad and even Suki by the way you're acting. So either stop it or stop seeing us.” I said straight to his face. Yes he is my brother and I do love him but some times people just need to be told straight. He was so annoying at this moment in time, he had brought some girl, who none of us knew to this gig, he had even made her look like Suki. Who was he kidding I could tell immediately that he didn’t really like her he was only bringing her because she looked like Suki. The absolute arse!

“Abi calm down. I don’t know what you’re talking about?” I rolled my eyes at him. He was either stupid or just being pathetic.

“You do.” I paused I was breaking down inside and I could feel it. “ You have been starving your-self and I know that… You have… You have tried to sort it out but if you don’t start eating properly then you may become bulimic. Then what will happen Harry? You could die or become anorexic? I would break down I need you. You’re my rock, my older brother and as much as those nightmares of yours are plaguing you at the moment your family needs you to get a good nights sleep and eat properly.” I was only giving suggestions and I could see Harry really thinking about what I was saying. “ I’m only saying that you’re hurting people and you shouldn’t be. I hate waking up and seeing you a miserable wreck walking about in your bedroom, you could be so much more and you have so much potential. Suki doesn’t even want to know you because of the way you’ve become. Think about that Harry, the person you’re turning into is not someone we want to be around.” I stopped talking he was looking at me oddly.

“Okay, I’ll think about what I shall do to make it up too everyone but while I am, can you give this to Suki from me?” He asked me out-stretching the bag in his right hand for me too take. I didn’t think anything of the words he said, I didn’t know that that was what he was thinking, if I had then I would have persuaded him otherwise, why did I have a go at him?

“Give it too her your-self, she’ll appreciate it more, what ever it is.” I answered and I was right if I had given it too her then she would think that he was a low life and I know that she needs to hold on to what she feels for Harry because I think everyone could benefit from it.

We walked back over to the girl he had brought with him and waited for the break to finish, where is Suki and David? Maybe, their somewhere relax-in, well good for them…