Desolate Love

Suki’s P.O.V…

Why is it that when you meet a celebrity you like, you end up being speechless? Or is it just me? I hope not. My mind had frozen to the spot, I couldn’t think what to say but then something made me say this and I don’t know what it was?

“It’s nice to meet you too Gerard.” I turned to the other guys. “Nice to meet you guys. Don’t worry I won’t bite your head off. Well not unless you have skittles cause then I’d anything for them.” They laughed along with me. Not at me, with me. I made the best band in the world laugh.

“I want some skittles.” Frank said quickly. Oh shit I set him off.

“Opps. Sorry guys.” I apologised to the guys quickly. “Frank I will go and get you some skittles if you calm down. Good boy, breathe.” The others laughed. Frank sulked in the corner giving us the evils. Okay I love Frank and I seriously didn’t mean to just piss him off but that was so in my favour, I just had to say it. I moved the hair out from in front of my face and continued talking to the guys. They made me laugh and showed me really that they were just ordinary guys looking to make a difference in the world. I love their music and it really has helped me to over come some of the obstacles in my life. I hope they can help loads of people for the rest of their lives because then they would deserve even more to go to heaven. I think they’d go there anyway as they are already gods. I laughed for no-reason.

“Watcha laughing at?” Ray asked with his big afro being more springy than ever.

“Just what I was thinking.” I laughed again. I could just imagine these guys dressed in the roman Gods dresses. The white robes and their gorgeous bodies, I would love to worship them. I then laughed at the thought of them posing in a sexy way as Gods and having people sculpture them like it.

“What are you laughing at?” Gerard asked and it would seem that Frank had stopped sulking and was just as eager as the rest of them to know what I was laughing at.

“It’s stupid really.” I answered. Can you picture Gerard on a cloud with no clothes on as a god? Maybe his privates fuzzed out nah better with them in I think! I laughed again. Why am I doing this to myself? Digging myself into a hole.

“I was just thinking of you guys dressed as Greek Gods and being sculptured in a sexy way and I can’t believe what I am saying to you.” I said quickly shutting up. I earned a laugh and smile from the dudes but then the security guard came in and said that they had to be on the stage in two minutes which would mean that we had to leave. It ruined the moment.

David and Gerard were communicating something to each other because when I got up to leave I turned round to find David mouthing something to Gerard but they stopped when they saw me looking. Then we left, me and David to go watch them perform….

Suki’s P.O.V….

I walked back through the raging crowd fighting my way through it to get to the gang, meeting the dudes really put me in a good mood for a while. I couldn’t wait for them to sing more songs, they really inspired me. We walked up to our seats or where we were standing as you don’t really sit at a concert.

My Chemical Romance took to the stage again this was the second half of there gig and I was loving it, the crowd went wild, screaming. Though all I could of was how I had met them and how normal they were, I mean I knew they were normal people but they seem special too me. On the other hand I some how compared them each to Harry, the only person who I always thought was wicked, well I did two weeks ago at least. I looked at Harry as I stood next to him, it was the first time I had actually spoken to him today.

“How are you Harry?” I asked almost glad I’d finally said something to him. Now at least I won’t hate myself.

“I’m alright now.” He said as he looked me in the eye. Why was it that he blew me away with what he said? Why now when David is a millimetre away from… Why do I then automatically think of Harry? I shouldn’t.

I went to turn away from him ashamed at myself for running along with words. I should not of spoken to him.

“Sorry.” I half whispered as I felt my cheeks glow with embarrassment as I turned to walk away.

“Wait.” He said, grabbing my right hand in his left as his right was prioritised by a bag that he held. He spun me round to face him and gave me the bag that he held with his hand. It wasn’t the most romantic thing to do but it wasn’t the worst either. “Open it, it’s for you.” He whispered so only I could hear. So I took the bag and opened it. You know how your heart stops at the sudden excitement of having something as you wonder what’s inside; well my heart was stopping every few minutes. I held my breath with no intention of doing so, I was almost surprised at the tension that was inside of me.

A thousand thoughts went through my head as I opened the bag. Seconds seemed to become minutes. Minutes became years. What will the present be? Is David watching? What should I do? Open it? What will it be? What if…

My hand reached down into the items and withdrew one, it turned out to be a t-shirt but when I turned it round my heart slowed. My breath went and I stood mesmerised by the picture that was in front of me. It was beautiful. The best present that I could get apart from meeting the band. (Are they competing for me?).

“There’s more…” He said and watched as I reached in the bag for more. I retrieved a large jumper with a picture of MCR on the back and their logo on the front. I felt like crying, why were they making it so hard to choose?

The smile on my face must have shown what it meant to me but the worry lines underneath showed the problems that this could cause. If I went and put these on in the toilets then what would David think? If I didn’t then Harry would think that I didn’t like them but they were awesome. I was just worried about if I should wear them when David was around. I mean I do like the clothes and I want to wear them but could I?

“Thank’s Harry.” I said as I stood holding these items, okay so the clouds were grey over head and David was behind me. I could feel his glare digging into me like a thousand broken hearts. When I looked at Harry his gaze was fixed on something behind me and so I presumed David. I shivered slightly and so decided that I would put the hoody on as an excuse to the fact that I was cold.

I didn’t have to see David’s and Harry’s eyes collide because I felt it in the atmosphere, it was like someone had just stabbed me a thousand times.

I turned sideways and looked at both of them.

“Would you two stop it? It feels like someone has committed murder.” Both of them looked at me with an odd expression.

“Suki, what are you on about?” David said, smiling at Harry trying to cover up for their greeting. I turned round to get Abi and when I did I heard the boys start to argue behind me quietly. I rolled my eyes at them before going to see Abi. When we came back the two of them were worse as they were now poking each other every time they said something too each other.

I was loosing my threat a bit with the two of them and a minute later I did the funniest thing. You know when the people on the stage ask for total silence and then everyone in the crowd goes quiet… (Usually when your brother farts and laughs at himself)…. Well MCR asked for silence and just as the crowd went silent yes I had too shout at the two twats….

“Will you two pack it in and grow up?” I looked around me when I realised that everyone had heard me, I was scared and embarrassed I could feel the shy feeling washing all over me and I looked at my feet instead of the crowd.

At least David took Harry out of the head lock that he had him in two seconds before, the crowd burst out laughing at them and me. (Well at least I stopped them fighting as well as humiliate myself).

“Who shouted that?” Frank said into the microphone, I don’t know why but I felt like I should reply. I was in a weird mood like a sugar high (that could only happen on skittles).

“The girl who made you sulk ten minutes ago because you had no skittles.” He laughed at me before Gerard spoke.

“Well Suki, strange as it is, I have been asked to dedicate this song too you from David.” He looked towards his band mates before stating the song “Disenchanted.” I turned to look at David astonished at the actual song dedicated to me. He walked over to Abi and they started talking. Claire went and talked to them making me wonder what I should do….

“David…” I began but I was speechless.

“Shhh…” He said as he put his arms round me. I leant my head on his chest and entangled my arms round him too. We stayed in that peaceful position until the end of the song. When I turned to face Harry, I found him missing. Where does everyone go when my back is turned?

“Are you alright Suki?” David asked from behind me. I was happy, I mean a song MCR sang was for me and although it wasn’t my favourite song by them that I would have wanted to of heard, I still liked it a lot.

“I’m fine.” I lied but I hugged him tighter because I wanted him to think that I was fine. I stood my arms round David, my head leaving on him and my eyes scanning the crowd and the stage for Harry. The guys were talking to us from the stage and I really wanted to know what Harry was up too… So me and David stopped holding each other, I was trying to be relaxed and not panic about Harry but he will always be on mind somehow. So where is he?