I Kissed a Boy

I put my head back onto my pillow and carried on crying. Alex's sobs faded after a few minutes, so I presumed he'd either gone in his own room or gone downstairs to cry on Ali for a while.
How exactly did this happen? He said we weren't even drunk or anything. If I was drunk, then maybe I would've understood why this whole thing happened. But no, I wasn't.
Someone knocked on my door then and it creaked open as they pushed it.
'Ed, are you okay?' It was Ali. Thank God, I don't think I could talk to Alex again.
'No.' I muttered, my face still buried in my pillow.
'I don't think Alex is either.' He said, sounding worried.
'And why should I care?' I said, my voice muffled for obvious reasons.
'Because the only words he could get out were 'He hates me, he hates me.' and he ran off crying. I don't know where he went.' he continued, his concern obvious. I pulled myself up and met his gaze.
'He thinks I hate him?' I asked, blinking back a few more tears. Ali nodded, biting his lower lip.
'Oh fuck.' I cursed. I know what Alex gets like in these situations. It normally doesn't end well. I stood up and grabbed the nearest hoodie. I found out it was a Fall Out Boy one when I zipped it up.
'Where are you going?' Ali asked, a confused look on his face.
'To go find him.' I replied, leaving the room and gradually speeding up into a run by the time I got to the front door. I had a pretty good idea of where he'd be. It's where he always goes whenever he's upset. I ran through half of York to get there, taking as many shortcuts as I could and ignoring anyone who tried to talk to me.
I found him, exactly where I knew he'd be. Sat underneath a tree just out of town. Tears were still pouring over his cheeks and his knees were pulled close to his chest. A rope was carefully coiled by his side, and he kept looking at it and crying even more each time. He didn't notice I was stood watching him until I said, reasonably quietly 'Alex?'
He looked at me and more tears fell from his bright blue eyes.
'Ed, go. I don't want anyone to have to see this.' He sobbed, standing up with the rope in his hand. Tears sprang to my eyes as I realised what he was going to do.
'Alex don't.' I pleaded, a few tears rolling over my cheeks. He shook his head.
'I have to.' He said, his voice barely more than a whisper.
'Why do you?' I replied, more tears falling.
'Because I love someone who I shouldn't.' He cried, starting to climb the tree. He settled himself down on a branch about halfway up the tree, a fair few meters from the ground.
'Would they want you to do this?' I asked, unable to blink back the now heavily multiplying tears.
'Probably.' He said, his lower lip trembling 'They hate me anyway.' He tied one end of the rope around the branch he was sat on.
'They wouldn't.' I said, horrified that he'd even think that. He tied the other end of the rope into a loop and slipped it around his neck.
'Alex, don't you dare jump!' I shouted, not caring who heard. He cried a few more tears and whimpered 'I love you.' He deliberatly slipped from the branch, his eyes closing for what I feared was the last time.
'Alex!'