Please Don't Make Me Beg

Li was beyond frustrated after talking with the police. It would be twenty four hours before they could classify Andi as missing, and by that time, she could have disappeared anywhere into the sprawling San Francisco area. They would have a much better chance of finding her if they could catch up with her while she and the boys were still on the highway.

She wanted so much to go after them herself, but with the head start they had, she knew she didn't stand a chance. They would be in California hours ahead of her, and she had no idea where they would be staying.

Her only hope was Evan's brother, Craig--and there was the irony. She had to be very careful not to say anything that might alarm him, or he might warn Evan out of loyalty to his brother. If he knew the police were involved, who knew where he might take Andi?

Cooper followed her faithfully step for step as she paced through the house, wagging his tail hopefully. The inability to do something was maddening, but at the moment, she was in a holding pattern, waiting, waiting...

Okay, think. At some point, she knew she was going to have to go pick Andi up. She might have to go all the way out to California, so she would probably need a few clothes. Someone would need to feed Cooper. She needed to call her job and let them know she would need some vacation time. Good--having some concrete things to focus on made it easier to wait for the police to contact her.

Upstairs, folding jeans and shirts, she heard the doorbell and Cooper's excited barking. She didn't recognize the car in the driveway, and as she headed toward the front door, caution kept her from opening the door. A quick look out the window, and she saw, to her surprise, that Stevie was standing on the front porch, twisting her purse strap nervously.

She welcomed her warmly. "Come on in, Stevie. Don't mind Cooper--he's harmless."

"Thanks. Hey, I'm sorry to show up on your doorstep like this. I had some--well, some trouble today, and there's something I need to tell you."

They sat down at the dining room table, and Stevie shared with her what had happened at work. Li was stunned. "I don't know whether I'm more angry or frightened. Stevie, I don't want to say anything to upset you, but if Evan was capable of this--and we don't know for certain that he is--do you think there's any chance he might hurt Andi?"

The girl wanted to say that no, of course she didn't think her brother was that kind of person, that he was funny and sweet and smart, moody too, but abusive?--never! But as she remembered the outburst in their kitchen, she felt a chill. Who else would have any way to get the key to her station at work? She knew, in spite of wanting not to, who it had to be.

"I think we'd better find them as soon as we can," she said, and to avoid upsetting Li, she didn't elaborate any further.

While Stevie went home to call her own mother and get a few extra clothes, Li loaded her bag into the trunk. Then, as an afterthought, she brought some things for Andi as well. She didn't know where her daughter might be when she found them, and her bags might be nowhere nearby.

She picked up Stevie at her house, and soon they were merging into the steady flow of traffic on the highway. As the miles slipped past them, Li was surprised to hear about the darker, angrier side of Evan. But Stevie had mentioned something else, something that she could hardly believe. Of all the studios the kids could be talking with, what were the chances it would be Adeline? It was almost too much of a coincidence.

The connection with Billie was unavoidable, and as hard as she had tried to put him out of her mind, the hollow pain in her heart made it difficult to think clearly. No longer than they had known each other, she still had a powerful need to call him, to lean on his strength through all this. But she knew she had to be fair to him--after all, she was the one who had turned away from him. He had a life, he had a concert to focus on...no, that was a closed chapter that didn't need reopening.

She and Stevie took turns driving until they reached the outskirts of Memphis, and since by that time it was close to midnight, they agreed it was time to stop for the night.

Stevie was in the shower when Li's cell phone rang, and she jumped to answer it.

"Mom?" The small voice in Li's ear was like the kiss of an angel. She put her fist against her lips to keep from crying; the relief was overwhelming.

"Yes, baby, I'm here. It's so good to hear from you. I've been trying so hard to reach you--are you alright?" She had to fight the urge to run back out to the car and keep driving, as fast as she could, to find her daughter.

"Yeah, I'm okay. I'm so sorry I haven't called. It's just...I was trying to figure out some things. I really miss you, Mom."

"Oh, sweetie, I miss you so much. Where are you now?"

"Well, I guess you've probably heard by now that we were going out to California."

"Yeah, I heard something about that. Did you think I might stop you from going if you told me?"

"I guess so--I didn't think you'd let me travel that far with Evan and Dan, even if we were planning to come back. And I wasn't sure if we would or not."

"It's okay, honey. The important thing is that you're safe, right?"

Andi hesitated just a moment too long for her liking. "Um, yeah, I'm doing fine. Pretty much."

The hairs on the back of Li's neck stood on end. "Pretty much." There was a world of unspoken meaning in those last two words. She tried to keep her voice calm, just as she always had when Andi was frightened.

"Anything you want to talk about?" Her heart was pounding in her chest, so hard she was almost afraid Andi could hear it.

"Well, it's just that...Evan and I aren't getting along so well. He seems kind of tense, and I keep saying the wrong thing and upsetting him. I'm sure it's just the stress, that's all," she rushed to explain.

Stevie, coming out of the shower with a towel around her hair, saw Li's grim expression and raised her eyebrows quizzically. Li looked at her and shook her head slowly.

"Is Dan with you too?"

"Yeah, he tries to help us smooth things over. He's a good friend. I'm glad he's here."

"I need to ask you, honey--Evan hasn't...hurt you in any way, has he?" She closed her eyes, afraid to hear what she knew was coming.

Sitting on the side of the hotel bathtub, Andi could see her own reflection in the mirror. The bruise around her eye was dark blue and purple, and her eyelid was still swollen. Her first impulse was to tell her mother everything was okay; she didn't want to admit she had gotten herself into something she couldn't handle. Then she thought about Evan's face, hard with anger, staring into the visor mirror at her, and knew she had to put her pride aside.

"Mom, I don't know what's happened, but he's changed so much. He got into a fight with Dan over--over nothing, and when I tried to break it up, he hit me, too!" Her voice was breaking, her chin trembling as she fought back the tears that stung her eyes.

"Oh God, baby, no!" Li was furious with him. Every mother's instinct she had wanted to wrap her hands around his throat and...

"How badly did he hurt you?" she asked around the lump in her throat.

"Just a black eye. I went to the urgent care and had it checked, and it wasn't anything serious. I just needed some ice." She wished more than anything she could lean on her mother's shoulder and feel her comforting embrace, but for now, her voice would have to do.

"Andi, listen. I'm not sure how you'll take this, but you might as well know that I'm not at home right now. Stevie and I are in Memphis, on the way to try to find you. Please tell me where you are, and we'll come and pick you up."

She gave her mother the name of the hotel, but she added, "We'll probably be leaving early in the morning. Evan said he wanted to try to make it the rest of the way tomorrow." Instinctively, Andi leaned forward and looked into her room, as if she thought someone might have crept through the window or picked the lock.

"Okay. But I don't think I can catch up to you tonight without some sleep. Honey, I really think it would be best if I called the police and asked them to come out there in the morning, after the 24 hour waiting period is up. I've already filed a report that you were missing, and after 11:30 tomorrow morning they can pick you up and bring you home."

The girl was quiet for a moment.

"What's wrong, Andi?" Li asked.

"Please don't think I'm crazy. I know what he's doing is wrong, and you and everybody else are probably thinking I ought to call the cops and have him arrested. But Mom, it's Evan, and I don't want him in trouble, I just want him to stop acting like this."

"Sweetheart, I know. A part of you still has feelings for him. But he's not going to change without someone making him do it."

Andi sighed sadly. "I guess not. But that's not the only thing, you know? It's just, it really sucks that Dan and I worked so hard for this, and now it seems like the whole thing's ruined."

Li knew nothing she said could help. "I know, it's really unfair to both of you. But you never know what might happen in the future, with your talent. Let's just get you safe as soon as we can."

As they said their goodbyes, they agreed that if anything happened before either Li or the police could get in touch, Andi would call 911 immediately, no hesitation. Li was very anxious about her being around him any longer, but they had to be cautious so they didn't provoke him until someone else was there to protect Andi.

Almost as soon as she hung up with her daughter, the phone rang again. She glanced down to see who could be calling so late.

The caller ID window said simply, "Billie Joe."