All We Know Is Falling
Days Eight and Nine: Epic.
Ian was told to wait in hospital while they checked everything out. We had to hang around until Monday, and even then he needed a wheelchair to get around. His leg was really badly cut up, and he couldn’t use crutches because his arm was too, so he was going to be relying on Sean a hell of a lot. Still, he didn’t have a job yet, and they had a lot of money to spend and everything. He was looking forward to chilling out with his boyfriend while he got better. Once he was all okay, he would go out, find a nice job to do to keep the income up. Seanie worked in a music shop with Snoz so Ian felt mean for not doing anything, even though he technically could retire now on the money he had earned.
Sean was just happy that Ian was alive. They had spent all of Wednesday night sitting in the hospital talking about the future. The idea of housing and where they wanted to live, and how they’d decorate their house. Ian’s new nurse, Rita, had bought them a load of Ikea magazines in from the waiting room, and had helped them work out what colour sofa to get while she was measuring out Ian’s burn medicine.
Ian had the drip taken out of his throat on the same night, and so was now on three spoons of strawberry-tasting burn aid every four hours. He said it reminded him of medicine his mum used to give him, Calpol.
Sean was also very emotional. More so than Ian was, because Ian didn’t really understand what he had gone through. To learn he had died twice, and brought back to live twice, was an extremely scary thought, but not as scary as thinking about having to attend a funeral for a boyfriend, lover, life-partner. And then having to live alone, without Ian, because Sean knew he would never find anyone he loved as much as Ian again, not if Ian left him.
Sean had shown a lot of raw emotions this week; fear, love, sadness and happiness. Nothing was more of a roller coaster ride than thinking you’d lost a loved one. Because of this, every little happy thing Ian mentioned, Sean cried at. Not out of choice, just because Sean was so happy that he could even talk to his boyfriend right now, let alone talk about such happy subjects.
They spent the whole of Thursday deciding what to do with the money in a sensible way, deciding what to save, what to spend on a house, how much to give to Ivy, how much to give to the family, and then finally how much to go shopping with. Sean joked around, saying if they were getting a new house, then he wanted a walk-in wardrobe, and to fill it. Ian thought it was a great idea, because him and Sean could share one, and he loved buying clothes for Sean, especially the really tight underwear, normally one size too small. Of course, he never told Sean he did it on purpose, and Sean never had the heart to tell him it was too small. Sean liked Ian buying new clothes, because he always took the piss. Ian’s clothes he bought now were so different to the clothes he used to wear, when he was all “nu-metal” and him and his friends used to wear baggy trousers and red t-shirts, where as now he was all smart shirts and tight jeans.
It was now Friday, and Sean had bought Ian’s laptop with him this morning when he came to the hospital. He had spent Wednesday night with Ian, falling asleep on the chair next to the bed, but this time he was happy to go home and get a good nights sleep. He also really needed a shower and a change of clothes, since he was still in the same shirt and jeans from Wednesday. He was walking into the hospital with wet hair, still fluffy from towel drying it, Ian’s laptop bag, a load of clothes in another overnight bag, and a bunch of small flowers from the gift shop shoved under his arm. He pressed the button for the elevator with his only free finger, and shuffled impatiently while the lift came into motion.
Sean walked into the white corridor, and around to Ian’s room, where he opened the door to find Jamie, Mike and Snoz in the room with Ian. They were telling him that they came on behalf of the other 7 guys, because they couldn’t fit ten people in a room. Sean suddenly felt a bit nervous about giving Ian the flowers, so instead dropped them on the floor before anyone could see and kicked them under Ian’s bed. He would give them to him later. He handed Ian his laptop bag, and chucked the overnight bag on the floor. He fluffed up his hair a bit, out of nerves really. Snoz was his best friend but he didn’t really know Jamie and Mike well enough to feel comfortable around them.
Ian nodded his hello, left Sean kiss him on the cheek and carried on talking to his friends. After hours of sitting sourly on the chair at the back of the room for Sean, Jamie, Mike and Snoz left, leaving Ian and Sean alone. Sean got down on his knees , reaching under the bed for the flowers. He was just handing them over when Jamie came back in the room because he’d left his bag inside.
Sean went bright pink as he noticed that he’d been seen. Ian giggled at his boyfriend, who went even redder as Jamie ‘aww’ed. Jamie ruffled Sean’s hair, telling him that Ian was lucky to have someone like him. This made Sean go a deeper shade of scarlet, but he felt proud of himself all the same.
When Jamie had gone, Ian took the flowers and pulled Sean’s lips down to his with his good arm, and kissed him firmly. Ian had missed Sean’s lips, and thinking he was never going to feel them again when he was stuck in what he thought was going to be his coffin was the worst feeling in the world. He loved having Sean’s arms around him, with their lips pressed together.
Ian pulled up his laptop, shifting over on the small bed so Sean could sit at the same level. He clicked around checking his emails and stuff first, most of which were from the boys and his mum, making sure he was okay. He had called his mum as soon as Sean had gone, informing her of what had happened, only to be told that Sean had already called in tears telling her he was in hospital. He replied to all the emails before Sean moved his finger onto the mouse pad, clicking on iTunes and playing around on that. Ian took over again and picked Sean’s favourite band of the moment, Faith No More.
Sean squealed like a little girl when Ian put on the song Epic, and sung along. Ian laughed and joined in, both of them giggling like school girls until Sean got a bit carried away and Rita had to tell them that it was getting late and they needed to keep it down. This just made them snigger even more. By the end of the night, they were both laughing at anything, and when Ian finally fell asleep in Sean’s arms, Sean didn’t have the heart to move, and so snuggled down in the cramped bed with Ian, thinking that everything was going to be alright after all.
Sean was just happy that Ian was alive. They had spent all of Wednesday night sitting in the hospital talking about the future. The idea of housing and where they wanted to live, and how they’d decorate their house. Ian’s new nurse, Rita, had bought them a load of Ikea magazines in from the waiting room, and had helped them work out what colour sofa to get while she was measuring out Ian’s burn medicine.
Ian had the drip taken out of his throat on the same night, and so was now on three spoons of strawberry-tasting burn aid every four hours. He said it reminded him of medicine his mum used to give him, Calpol.
Sean was also very emotional. More so than Ian was, because Ian didn’t really understand what he had gone through. To learn he had died twice, and brought back to live twice, was an extremely scary thought, but not as scary as thinking about having to attend a funeral for a boyfriend, lover, life-partner. And then having to live alone, without Ian, because Sean knew he would never find anyone he loved as much as Ian again, not if Ian left him.
Sean had shown a lot of raw emotions this week; fear, love, sadness and happiness. Nothing was more of a roller coaster ride than thinking you’d lost a loved one. Because of this, every little happy thing Ian mentioned, Sean cried at. Not out of choice, just because Sean was so happy that he could even talk to his boyfriend right now, let alone talk about such happy subjects.
They spent the whole of Thursday deciding what to do with the money in a sensible way, deciding what to save, what to spend on a house, how much to give to Ivy, how much to give to the family, and then finally how much to go shopping with. Sean joked around, saying if they were getting a new house, then he wanted a walk-in wardrobe, and to fill it. Ian thought it was a great idea, because him and Sean could share one, and he loved buying clothes for Sean, especially the really tight underwear, normally one size too small. Of course, he never told Sean he did it on purpose, and Sean never had the heart to tell him it was too small. Sean liked Ian buying new clothes, because he always took the piss. Ian’s clothes he bought now were so different to the clothes he used to wear, when he was all “nu-metal” and him and his friends used to wear baggy trousers and red t-shirts, where as now he was all smart shirts and tight jeans.
It was now Friday, and Sean had bought Ian’s laptop with him this morning when he came to the hospital. He had spent Wednesday night with Ian, falling asleep on the chair next to the bed, but this time he was happy to go home and get a good nights sleep. He also really needed a shower and a change of clothes, since he was still in the same shirt and jeans from Wednesday. He was walking into the hospital with wet hair, still fluffy from towel drying it, Ian’s laptop bag, a load of clothes in another overnight bag, and a bunch of small flowers from the gift shop shoved under his arm. He pressed the button for the elevator with his only free finger, and shuffled impatiently while the lift came into motion.
Sean walked into the white corridor, and around to Ian’s room, where he opened the door to find Jamie, Mike and Snoz in the room with Ian. They were telling him that they came on behalf of the other 7 guys, because they couldn’t fit ten people in a room. Sean suddenly felt a bit nervous about giving Ian the flowers, so instead dropped them on the floor before anyone could see and kicked them under Ian’s bed. He would give them to him later. He handed Ian his laptop bag, and chucked the overnight bag on the floor. He fluffed up his hair a bit, out of nerves really. Snoz was his best friend but he didn’t really know Jamie and Mike well enough to feel comfortable around them.
Ian nodded his hello, left Sean kiss him on the cheek and carried on talking to his friends. After hours of sitting sourly on the chair at the back of the room for Sean, Jamie, Mike and Snoz left, leaving Ian and Sean alone. Sean got down on his knees , reaching under the bed for the flowers. He was just handing them over when Jamie came back in the room because he’d left his bag inside.
Sean went bright pink as he noticed that he’d been seen. Ian giggled at his boyfriend, who went even redder as Jamie ‘aww’ed. Jamie ruffled Sean’s hair, telling him that Ian was lucky to have someone like him. This made Sean go a deeper shade of scarlet, but he felt proud of himself all the same.
When Jamie had gone, Ian took the flowers and pulled Sean’s lips down to his with his good arm, and kissed him firmly. Ian had missed Sean’s lips, and thinking he was never going to feel them again when he was stuck in what he thought was going to be his coffin was the worst feeling in the world. He loved having Sean’s arms around him, with their lips pressed together.
Ian pulled up his laptop, shifting over on the small bed so Sean could sit at the same level. He clicked around checking his emails and stuff first, most of which were from the boys and his mum, making sure he was okay. He had called his mum as soon as Sean had gone, informing her of what had happened, only to be told that Sean had already called in tears telling her he was in hospital. He replied to all the emails before Sean moved his finger onto the mouse pad, clicking on iTunes and playing around on that. Ian took over again and picked Sean’s favourite band of the moment, Faith No More.
Sean squealed like a little girl when Ian put on the song Epic, and sung along. Ian laughed and joined in, both of them giggling like school girls until Sean got a bit carried away and Rita had to tell them that it was getting late and they needed to keep it down. This just made them snigger even more. By the end of the night, they were both laughing at anything, and when Ian finally fell asleep in Sean’s arms, Sean didn’t have the heart to move, and so snuggled down in the cramped bed with Ian, thinking that everything was going to be alright after all.