It's the Mess That Feels So Right...

-William’s PoV-

“William?”

After watching her jump up the stairs and fight through her bag for her keys, I realized that this idea could possibly be categorized in my, it-seemed-like-a-good-idea-at-the-time moments, because at that moment; I was starting to feel like a downright idiot.

I realized by now, I probably should have said something; the silence had caused Bee’s expression to change from shock to a sudden look of confusion. From a sudden push from impulse, I managed to walk forward, letting out a small smile.

“Hey,” I said breezily, watching as Bee returned my smile as she absentmindedly played with the straps of her bag.

“Wow, what are you doing here?” She asked, leaning in to give me a quick hug and drawing back, opening her mouth before I could answer her previous question.

“Come inside, please excuse the mess. Suarez and Nate came over on Sunday night which resulted in making smores and in turn, pretty much endangered everyone in this apartment, and I haven’t got round to cleaning it yet,” She mused with a laugh, it wasn’t one of those dainty laughs, it was a hearty, loud laugh, making it clear how much Gabe had influenced her.

“That’s okay, after being on tour and sharing a sleeping area with about eight other men, I’ve seen much, much worse,” I said, laughing along with her. I watched as she chucked her bag down on the couch, and turned around to face me again, and I took the momentary silence as a chance to clear my head.

“So, uh, Gabe isn’t here, he’s on tour...” Bee trailed off as she saw the sheepish smile on my face, and she began to smile as well. “But you already knew that.”

I held my hands out in front of me guilty, and laughed again.

“You caught me. Well, I was staying with a friend, and I hadn’t seen you in a while...” I said, referring to the one and a half days between the party and today.

Bee gave out a small snort. “Try a year and a half...” Then it hit me, she hadn’t recognized me from the party. She had no clue that it had been me, and maybe... Maybe I wasn’t going to tell her. At least not now.

“Wait, how come I didn’t see you at my party? Where you there?” She interrogated me with a playful smile.

“I was, actually!” I defended myself and she just laughed again and apologized for not seeing me.

“You’re definitely changed Mister Rock-star Beckett,” Bee said with a laugh and walked over to the kitchen, while I stood awkwardly in the middle of her lounge.

“Changed in a good way, or a bad way?”

“Well... good I guess. Different, yeah, that’s it; you’re different to how I remember. You want anything to drink?” Before I got a chance to ask about how I had changed, another thought popped into my head.

“Uh, no thanks. But, erm, do you want to go for a walk?” I asked, as Bee disappeared from view as she was digging through the fridge. She pulled her head out of the doorway and looked up at me with a sudden smile.

“Yeah, sure. I need to walk my puppy anyway.” With that, Bee walked over to the entrance of the hallway and called out ‘Puppy” a few times. A sudden ball of white fur came galloping into her arms as she picked it up from the ground.

I looked at her in disbelief. “Puppy?”

“It’s her name until I find her a proper one. Gabe got her for my birthday and won’t help me pick her out a name because I wouldn’t call her what he wanted. Does she look like a Peanut to you?” She said, rolling her eyes and thrusting the dog under my nose.

“Not really, but I guess it is better than puppy,” I replied with a smirk. Bee poked out her tongue at me and began looking under mountain of papers that decorated the apartment, before pulling out a leash which she connected to the puppy’s collar.

“Right, are we ready to go, Mister Beckett?” Bee asked with a smile.

“How does the park sound?” I asked, returning the smile and opening the door, motioning for her to go through.

“If there’s ice cream afterward, you have got yourself a deal!”

“I’ll even push you on the swings.”

-X-

“What, you think Batman wouldn’t make a good puppy name?” Bee argued, as we strolled through the park, the puppy running out in front with her tongue lolling out.

“Well, maybe for a boy!” I retorted, shaking my head with a smile as Bee made an attempt to push me off the sidewalk.

“Okay, how about Boo?”

“Boo?”

“You know, the little girl off Monsters. Inc?” Bee explained with a shocked look. How was I supposed to know that?

“Oh, the one that dressed up like a shrimp...thing?” I tried again, rolling my eyes as she glared at me.

“Yes, the one that dressed up like a shrimp! Wow mister Beckett, you really don’t know your Disney characters!” Bee teased as we neared a small playground that centered the middle of the park, adorned with small children, their shrieks of laughter carried by the wind, washing over us.

“Okay, how about Pookie? You know, off Garfield?” Bee tried again. I crinkled up my nose at that one.

“Sounds like one of those mushy romantic names that one month old couples use for each other,” I mumbled as Bee laughed.

“And I thought you were the romantic type, Mister Beckett!” Don’t blush, don’t blush, don’t blush.

Dammit.

Bee leant down to pat ‘Puppy’ on the head, muttering, “It seems like you’re never going to get a name.”

“Oh, ice cream!” Bee was suddenly not next to me, talking to the fluff ball, but seven paces ahead, madly dashing toward the ice cream stand, dragging the puppy with her. She was happily chatting up the ice cream man when I made my way over, flashing me a smile as she grabbed her ice cream. After grabbing an ice cream myself and paying, we made our way over to the bench adjacent to the park and sat in a comfortable silence, Bee smiling at the little kids who were yelling and running around in excitement.

Suddenly, Bee turned around and stared at me, looking me over like she didn’t want to forget a detail.

“Tell me something, Mister Beckett,” Bee said simply, returning to eating her ice cream.

“Tell you... what?” I asked, outwardly confused by this spontaneous statement.

“I don’t know; just tell me something about yourself.”

“Uh, alright, my favorite movie is Jurassic Park and I’m left handed. That good enough?”
Bee rolled her eyes and laughed. “Any fan girl with Internet access could find that one out. Tell me something random, that limited people know.”

“Well...” There was something about this moment that I would remember for the rest of my life. I think it was the fact that with anyone else, I would have immediately shut myself down, closed up to that person and dug myself into an anti-social hole. I had trust issues, and I was the first to admit it, but there was something about Bee, just the way she held herself and her charisma that managed to make me open up.

“I broke up with my high school sweetheart, Christine, a month or so ago and I needed to get away from everything and everyone so now I’m here. Funny thing is, she’s moved on while I am still pathetically moping in my self-pity,” I mumbled, focusing on ‘Puppy’ rather than the silent girl next to me.

“I don’t see what’s funny about that...” Bee started off quietly. “You must have cared for her an awful lot, and that’s why it’s so hard to move on. There’s nothing wrong with that.”
I couldn’t help but look at her with wide, incredulous eyes. How could someone I barely knew draw something so personal and painful from me and empathize like she had seen inside my head? It scared me but filled me with hope, so there was a light at the end afterward.

“Last one to the swings sucks Pete’s balls!” Bee was suddenly standing, her bright face beaming down at me, the ice cream long gone.

“What?” I slowly stood, my own smile forming.

“Ready? Set?” But she had already gone, her shoes kicking up small puddles that had formed in last night’s downpour, the puppy yapping at her heels. And I too followed her; the grin my face held was unable to be covered up. It felt like time had gone back; we were just two kids with nothing to do in life but to enjoy it. Breathless and laughing, smiling and wide eyed, Bee arriving at the swings first with a look of triumphant as she handed me the dog leash, and motioned for me to push her.

After countless minutes of her laughing as she was hoisted in to the air by my ‘skinny white boy arms’ as she told me, she finally jumped off, landing on her feet and grabbing the back the leash.

“Well Will, I think it’s time you walked me home. Homework calls!” Bee tried to drape an arm around my shoulders but there was a slight height issue, so instead, I wrapped my arm around her as the cool evening air picked up and bit down on the exposed flesh. Finally we reached her apartment, and I could feel that happiness I had worked up, wearing off.

“We should do this again, it was fun,” Bee said with another smile, giving me a small hug.

“Yeah, most definitely. I’ll see you around?”

“Absolutely.” Bee turned and began walking off as I did the same.

“Shylo,” I muttered, loud enough for Bee to hear.

“Huh?” Bee turned around, looking confused at my outburst.

“Shylo, the name for your puppy,” I explained and a sudden smile unfurled on Bee’s lips.

“It’s perfect! Thanks, Will!”

“You’re welcome, and do me a favor, Bee?” I asked with a smirk.

“Anything.”

“Don’t ever be in changed of naming your future children.”