Even After Everything

An hour later, having spent far too much time on my makeup and hair, I hear a knock at the door and throw my window open, yelling ‘one second! I’m just getting dressed!’

Pulling on some pink skinny jeans and a plain white off the shoulder t-shirt [I say off the shoulder, but really the neck was just too big], I leg it down stairs, shoving on a pair of black kitten heeled shoes and wrenching the door open.

‘I’m so sorry!’ I gasp, clutching onto the door frame to ease the stitch I’d gotten. ‘I was on schedule and everything…except - the old man peed and I had to clean it up.’

He raises a single eyebrow, as I slap myself inwardly for how that sounded. ‘Old man?’

‘My dog,’ I remedy honestly. ‘It’s a terrier and he has an old man face, so we just call him old man most of the time.’ I pull the door shut behind me as I step out of the house. He looks down at my feet and pulls that half smile.

That’s so unbelievably cute.

‘Those shoes,’ he murmurs, amused at something.

‘What about them?’ I ask nervously. ‘We’re not going to be hiking or anything, are we?’

He laughs. Did I make him laugh?

‘No, I just…see them everywhere it seems.’ He walks slowly over to an old Ford and holds open the door for me to climb in. As I do so, I become aware of just how hot it is. The weather has been pretty miserable all week, and now the sun is out like it never even went away.

‘Sorry about the smell,’ he says, after having shut my door and stepping in through his own. ‘I think the rental company I got this off like pine a lot.’

I giggle as he pulls out of my drive and heads down the little country lane. I haven’t been down this way in…in a long time, and yet it seems so familiar. I’m filled with unease as he drives further, turning a corner smoothly as I clutch onto the seat and try to shake the feeling. He throws me a questioning look.

‘Are you okay?’

I nod, swallowing, as he pulls easily around the next corner, passing the huge oak tree that overshadows the field I used to play in. And the uneasiness is gone - I let out a deep breath and William looks around at the area, confused.

‘I’m fine,’ I clarify. ‘I just, that corner gives me the jitters.’

He nods, and turns on his CD player, twiddling the volume button.

‘May as well get used to the song, huh?’ he says, as I hear the slow intro to Saltwater Room. The male voice doesn’t kick in though, and instead I hear William’s, glazing over the backing track in his own voice, his own style. And suddenly, I’m not so worried that I can’t reproduce the girls tone - obviously this wasn’t one of those types of covers. I should have guessed that William would have wanted to make the song his own.

As the short instrumental a quarter of the way through begins, I take a deep breath, preparing to sing, and let out my voice as it reaches that 1 minute 54.

‘Time together is just never quite enough…’ I start, almost jumping as William’s voice blends seamlessly into my own.

‘When you and I are alone, I’ve never felt so at home…’ he cuts through smoothly, and I continue, smiling as he throws me a look I can’t interpret.

‘What will it take to make or break this hint of love?’

‘We need time…only time…’

‘When we’re apart whatever are you thinking of?’

‘If this is what I call home, why does it feel so alone?’

‘So tell me darling, do you wish we’d fall in love?’

‘All the time…all the time…’

As William drags out the last word, I turn to look at him, and he’s squinting slightly, a pained look on his face. But he carries on singing, and I carry on blending in, wishing really, that I could just listen to his voice on it’s own. All on it’s own.

Eventually, we reach Robannas, pulling up in the car park and just sitting there, until William’s phone goes off. He looks at then screen and climbs out of the car as I stay seated - obviously he wants some privacy. But even as he stands outside I can still hear his muffled voice.

‘Hello? Gabe…yeah. Robannas - it’s this studio in Birmingham. What do you mean? I’m not - I’m not doing anything. Really. I wouldn’t. I know - I know I can’t…at least not unless she remembers. Don’t give me that. You can’t expect me to just sit here. Besides, I have a cover that needs doing. I have no one else, she’s perfect…for it. Uh huh…uh huh…did I get any messages? Ah fuck…I guess I’ll need to sort that. Okay, well. Will you send me your cover then? Yeah, send it to my phone and I’ll tell you what I think. Thanks Gabe…bye.’

I watch as William snaps his phone shut and walks round to my side, averting my eyes hastily as he opens the door. He looks at me as I step out, and murmurs a faint, ‘Sorry about that - Gabe, he’s like my stalker.’ He smiles weakly as he begins to walk over to a huge rectangular building, me following shortly behind.

‘Um…William?’

‘Will.’

‘What?’

‘You can call me Will.’

‘Oh, ok. Will? What’s the time?’

He flicks a look at his bare arm. ‘Two hairs past a freckle,’ he grins as I swat his arm playfully.

We enter into the building together, and walk over to a desk, behind which is sat a woman who only looks about my age. She’s vaguely familiar, and her eyes flick over mine as if she’s thinking the same thing. As they fall on William, they grow huge and her jaw hangs loosely as he leans one elbow on the desk lazily and mutters something.

‘Yes, yes - one ten, right?' she squeaks. 'Um…can I just say - I love your work. I’ve been listening for years - I’ve been to almost every one of your UK shows. My name’s Claire, do you remember me?’

He looks a little bewildered, but she breezes on as though he murmured an ascent. ‘You signed my bra once, and we were waiting outside your hotel on your last autumn tour. Me and my friends.’

‘Oh, of course!’ He still looks as though he doesn’t have the foggiest. ‘Well thank you so much. You have no idea what it means to hear people say that, even now.’

She beams widely and hands him a laminate badge, pointing towards a door . He walks off slowly towards the door as she holds one out to me too, and I step forward to accept it.

‘I didn’t think I’d be seeing you again,’ she whispers slyly.

‘Huh?’ Do I know her?

‘I think it was really rude for you to not tell us who you were, after we were so hospitable and waited with you.’

My brow furrows in confusion. ‘Sorry, I think you must have the wrong person,’ I stammer.

‘No…’ she pulls a concentrating face. ‘…Hannah, right? I remember, ‘cause that was my friends name too.’

‘I…I don’t know what you’re talking about.’

She rolls her eyes and glares at me.

‘Fine, if you’re going to be that way. If you ever get famous, I’m going to be the first to trash your manners. Through that door, and turn right.’

I just stand and stare at her for a moment, before following through the door William had just left through, bewildered.