Give It a Chance for Our Love to Start

"You could just admit it now," Joe said.

I rolled my eyes, nudging Bethany. Bethany, Joe, and I were walking home from the mall. Joe had, of course, decided to tag along to Bethany's and mine shopping night. Bethany had been rather quiet the whole time. And Joe and I had beenflirting bickering. "And why would I lie?"

"Oh you'd be lying," he smirked, stopping. I noticed we were in front of our houses. "So why are you wearing my necklace then?"

"Um," Bethany said quickly. "Goodnight." She practically ran to her house.

Joe stood there, smirking at me. "So you liked my gift?"

I shrugged. "I can't say no to something pretty."

He sighed, grinning now. "I'll be sure to get you something from L.A. then."

"L.A.," I asked, surprised.

He smirked. "You know, the city I'm moving to in California."

I rolled my eyes. "I'm not an idiot. I know what L.A. is. I meant you're going to L.A.?"

He looked at me, confused. "Yeah, tomorrow, remember? Nick, Kevin, and I were here for a week, and we have to go back. My parents and Frankie are staying here. We have those recording sessions, remember?"

"No," I rolled my eyes. "You didn't tell me that."

"I sent it in an email," he reminded me, smiling.

Email? Oh those stupid emails Bethany had sent him. "Are you coming back?"

"In three weeks," he said. "Why? Are you going to miss me?"

I rolled my eyes, trying not to show him I would. "As if. Fine, go. But I won't say what you want me to until you come back."

He smirked. "That sounds like you're admitting it though."

"Whatever," I rolled my eyes. "Goodnight," I said, turning to go.

"Hey," he called after me.

I stopped, and turned, smirking at him. "Yes?"

He walked over to me, standing not 3 inches away from me. I could feel his breath on my face, burning me. I wanted so badly to feel his lips on mine. "That's not how we say goodbye in New Jersey." His voice was slow and low. It was killing me.

"Oh really," I gasped. "So how do they say goodbye in New Jersey?"

His hand moved to hover over my forehead, moving down slowly. "First, close your eyes," he whispered. I obeyed. "And then your lips meet softly," he said. I waited, frozen, longing for his lips to meet mine. They touched mine lightly, barely even touching them, only for a second. But that second seemed to last forever. It felt like we were the only two people on the world. "Goodnight," he pulled away.

I slowly opened my eyes, seeing him already walking away. I sighed, staring after him, the feel of his lips still on mine. I felt a grin creep up on my face. I had never thought a guy could make me feel like this, and yet he had me. He fully had every ounce of my attention. I turned, walking into my house. Then I remembered he was leaving. I sighed. Three weeks I would have to live with this feeling, never having this thirst quenched. I wanted him, and only him.

I got into bed. "You're no fair mom," I sighed, looking at my mom's picture. "I finally find the guy I want, and he's leaving. Yeah, yeah, only for three weeks, I know. But Bethany is leaving for a while too, and I'll be all alone. It's not fair." I sighed, resting my head on my pillow. "I'll miss you Joe," I breathed, closing my eyes.

[>>>]

Joe just kissed Tinsley. I saw it as I was closing my curtains. I saw her walking away, stopping, and turning. I saw him moving close, leaning towards her. I saw their lips meet. And I saw the look on her face as she watched him walk away. Tinsley was falling in love with the love of my life. And I would be left in the dark.

"Knock, knock," I heard from my doorway. I saw Nick standing there.

"Hey," I said, moving to sit on my bed.

"Hey," he said, moving to sit next to me. I saw his eyes linger on the window before turning to me. He smiled, but didn't say anything.

Not really knowing what to say, I smiled back, trying to rack my brain for anything. "So, leaving tomorrow, huh?"

"Yeah," he said, his gaze still staring at me.

"You haven't seen the new house yet, right," I asked

"Not yet," he said.

"Excited?"

He shrugged. "Kind of." He didn't offer any more. "Bethany," he said quietly.

"Yes," I asked, my voice just as quiet for some reason. I didn't know why, but it felt wrong to say it louder.

"I--," he started. But then he stopped, shaking his head. "Never mind."

"What is it," I asked.

"It was nothing," he smiled at me weakly.

"Tell me," I begged.

He sighed. "You're as stubborn as Joe," he observed. "Just remember that I can be a good friend Bethany. In case you're ever in the need of one. When you need me most, Beth, I'll be here."

I didn't really get what he was saying, but I smiled. "Thanks Nick. That means a lot."

He smiled, standing up, and I followed suit. "Anyways, I have to go finish packing. Will I see you tomorrow before I leave?"

"Definitely," I grinned. "If I'm not up, you have permission to get me up by any means necessary." I hugged him as he laughed. He kissed my cheek before leaving.

I sighed, sitting back down. They were leaving, and Joe didn't know it was me who had written the letters. But after seeing the look on Tinsley's face, did I want to ruin her happiness for her? Did I want Joe to know I deceived him? I sighed, turning on my old CD player and picking up my beat up copy of Pride & Prejudice. This book had been through hell and back, and it was still my favorite. I must have read this a hundred times. I opened the cover, laying down and getting ready to start the awe-inspiring love story of Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy.

"Hey," someone said from my doorway. I looked up to see Joe coming in. I smiled at him. "Am I interrupting?"

I closed the book, sitting up. "No."

He smiled. "So I just came to say goodbye," he said, walking closer.

"That's right," I said. "You guys have your recording session for three weeks."

He groaned. "How do you know and Tinsley can't even remember that I'm leaving?"

"Maybe she doesn't want to remember that you're leaving," I suggested.

"She doesn't act like it," he sighed, sitting down on my bed.

I laughed. "You're a very narrow minded person, aren't you?"

He glared at me playfully. "It's not that. I mean, for so long, she's been the only girl for me. It's like we could be in a crowded room, and she'll be the only one I see. I mean her letters –" I gasped, holding my breath for more. "I love her Bethany," he sighed. "And from her letters, it seemed like she felt exactly the same way. But why is she so hesitant to just tell me? I mean, she was always more open in her letters to me."

"Knowing someone from online is different from knowing someone in person," I said quietly. "Sometimes, the person online is really a totally different person."

He sighed, shaking his head. "You know Bethany. You've become such a good friend to me. What am I going to do without you in L.A.? You're coming there soon right? Why don't you just come with us tomorrow?"

I laughed nervously at the feeling of Joe needing me. It felt so good, so right. "When you need me most, and you're ever in need of a friend, just close your eyes," I said. "And think of me, and I'll be there."

He held his hand out. "Promise?"

I laughed, shaking his hand. "Promise."

He lifted my hand, kissing it softly. "I'll hold you to that," he said. We were quiet then. On the CD player, we heard the beginning of Only Hope by Switchfoot come on. "There's a song that's inside of my soul."

"Hey, I love this song," Joe grinned. "Turn it up?"

"Okay," I grinned back, getting up to turn it louder. The song started to skip. I groaned. "This stupid CD player. I'm so mad Tinsley 'borrowed' my iPod."

"It's the one that I've tried to write," Joe started to sing. I turned to look at him, and he offered me his hand. I laughed, taking it and we started twirling as Joe sang. "Over and over again. I'm awake and in the infinite cold. But you sing to me over and over and over again. So I lay my head back down. And I lift my hands. And pray to be only yours. I pray to be only yours. I know now you're my only hope." We were facing each other now, our eyes locked, our bodies immobile. For a spilt second, I felt like Joe knew I was the girl from the emails, like I was the girl he loved. He shook his head, smiling timidly, before pushing me away, pulling me back, and twirling me as he hummed the rest of it.

I couldn't concentrate anymore. I was too focused on how it had felt to feel like we were the only two people in the world. Like it was just he and I. There was no Tinsley problem, and no lies. It was just us, and we were in love. But then I remembered that that wasn't how it was. Those problems, those obstacles, Tinsley. They were all very real. And Joe loved her, not me. I pulled away from him, unable to take it anymore.

He started laughing nervously. "Oh man," he said, breathing heavily. "I'm going to miss you."

I smiled at him weakly. "I'll miss you too." He had no idea how much.