Something Better

Ho hum…

Where the hell is this dude already? Ugh… Joe was supposed to pick me up from this wretched place like, a half an hour ago, at 4:00. It is now 4:30 and he is still not here! I want to go home people! I’m tired of this stupid hospital. I’m tired of the disgusting food that they give me every single day. It sucks… I just want to go home and spend the rest of the night with Joe.

But that’s not going to happen if he doesn’t get his sorry ass down here!

Just then the door opened and Joe walked in all out of breath. It’s about time (no puns intended).

He came over to me and gave me a sympathetic look. “I’m so sorry that I’m late. I just got too caught up in getting things ready.” He smiled at me.

“Getting what ready? You guys aren’t throwing me a welcome back party, are you?” I glared at him. He just laughed at me.

“No, I knew you wouldn’t want that. So I thought of something better!” He clapped his hands together and smiled wide.

I breathed a sigh of relief. Joe knew me so well. He knew that I hated parties with a passion. I just don’t like it when everyone’s attention is on me. It makes things… awkward. I don’t know… they always make me self-conscious, like if I don’t look or act the way I’m supposed to at parties then they’ll think I’m weird. Which I could really care less about, since practically everyone besides Joe thinks I’m weird. Yes, including Rachel. But its okay, we can be weird together.

I’m just really happy that Joe was very thoughtful of me and didn’t do a party. That was very nice of him. “Thanks Joe. So what are we doing then?”

Joe smiled a toothy, goofy smile. “It’s a surprise.” He whispered. My face automatically fell and all the happy thoughts that I was thinking about him before disappeared. I’d rather him just throw a freaking party. He knows how much I hate surprises. Even more so that parties.

One time, my mom decided to be really nice one year (or so she thought) and threw me a surprise birthday party when I turned thirteen. I’m positive that Joe remembers that little incident.

Birthday party. Surprise. Not a good mix.

Let’s just say that after everyone yelled surprise, I fled out of the building and down the busy street screaming, “I hate you! I hate you!” with my dad running after me. Yeah, not one of my happiest memories.

I glared at Joe again and said, “Can’t you just leave me here?” That is literally how much I hate surprises. I would rather stay in a stinky hospital than be surprised by Joe. But seriously, why can’t people just tell you what’s going on? Why does it have to be ‘a surprise?’ To make it more fun? Who the hell invented this stuff anyway? I’ll build a time machine myself, go back in time, and shoot the person who invented surprises.

Aren’t I a wonderful person to hang out with?

“Come on Alyssa. Can’t you just go along with this one time? Just one time, I swear!” He begged me. “This is the surprise you’ve been waiting for. You can finally find out the reason why I was ignoring you for so long. I can finally let you know how much you mean to me, just with this one little surprise. Please Alyssa. You’ll love it, I promise.” He was now on his knees right next to the bed, begging me. Mind you, I was still glaring at him.

“Joseph, you know how much I hate surprises.” Was all I said. But I didn’t want him to know that when he told me that this surprise was the reason he was away from me for so long, it intrigued me. I didn’t need to let him know I was the least bit interested because once he finds my weak spot there’s no ignoring him any longer. So I must hold my ground for this one.

“Alyssa please! Come on, just this one time! I promise you that you won’t be miserable the entire time. I promise you that once I show you the surprise you’ll forget about all your troubles. It’ll be just you and me.” He looked pleadingly into my eyes.

This better be a hell of a surprise to make up for all the time he made me suffer. Well, it must be, since it took him forever just to get everything ready. I mean, he was even finishing things up today. Why would he go through all that trouble just for me, especially since I accused him of cheating? Why didn’t he just cancel it? Hmm… maybe he couldn’t get a refund.

I sighed and stopped glaring at him. “This better be good Joe.” Might as well make his day. He seems to have gone through a lot just to get this thing ready, so I don’t want to disappoint him.

Relief immediately overtook his face and he smiled wide at me again. “Oh, thank you so much. You won’t regret it, I swear. It will be better than anything you’ve ever experienced. I…” He sighed. “I’m just so happy that you said yes.” He chuckled a little bit and then looked at me lovingly.

Am I really that bad? That he would worry about me liking it? Jeez… He makes me feel like a complete bitch. If I were him, I would’ve broken up with me already.

I gave Joe an apologetic look, but kept my eyes from looking into his. He made me feel guilty, and I felt the need to apologize. “I’m sorry Joe… for being stubborn. I mean, I should at least be happy to get to spend some time wi-“ Joe cut me off.

“No, baby. No, you don’t have to apologize. It’s perfectly fine. I completely understand the fact that you don’t like surprises. I would hate to have to deal with something that I don’t like either. Don’t worry about it. It’s fine.” He started caressing my left cheek with his hand.

How could he possibly be this understanding with a bitch like me? Seriously. I would be like, “Fine then. Fuck you. You can forget about the surprise and me. We’re through!” But that’s just me, ‘cause I’m a bitch like that.

“Yeah but, you make me feel like such a bitch.” I told him honestly, bringing my eyes back up to look at him.

Joe laughed at me and stopped caressing my cheek. “Alyssa…” He tried to talk, but just ended up laughing again.

I eyes squinted and my mouth fell agape. “What’s so funny?! I’m being serious!” I yelled. I can’t believe Joe’s even laughing at this. Maybe that’s why I dated him in the first place. I could be mean to him and he could care less.

Joe shook his head as he started to calm down. “Alyssa, you’re not a bitch.” He laughed a little more. “You just don’t like surprises. It’s completely understandable. And you know what, I would actually tell you where we are going since I know you hate them, but this kind of surprise isn’t allowed to be told. It would just ruin everything.” He smirked at me.

I knitted my eyebrows together. “Then what the hell kind of surprise is it?” Is there really even such a thing where if you told someone a surprise, it would ruin everything? I don’t believe it.

“One of a kind.” Then he winked at me.

Well, what’s that supposed to mean?! Let me just tell you, that no surprise in this whole universe could possibly ruin anything. Maybe a secret, but that’s a different story. There are secrets that are meant to be kept and never told, but surprises eventually show up somewhere. Someone always finds out about them, no matter the circumstance, because they’re meant to be told. Secrets, on the other hand, are not. So what kind of surprise could possibly be ‘one of a kind?’

I rolled my eyes and said, “Whatever.”

Joe’s eyes widened. “Oh! I forgot to tell you!” He bent down and picked something up off of the floor. “I brought you a change of clothes, since I’m pretty sure you don’t want to walk out of here in that ugly gown thing you have on.” He gave me a disgusted look and handed me the clothes.

I laughed and took the clothes. “Oh, come on. You know you think I look sexy in this.” Joe laughed as well, and then became serious. “Yeah, you’re right. Not quite sexy, but very beautiful. You can make any outfit look beautiful.” He then smiled at me.

*content sigh* This guy is too good to be true.

I slightly blushed at his comment and looked towards the end of the bed. “Thanks.” I mumbled.

There was a short silence that followed.

“Um… don’t you want to get changed? It doesn’t matter to me; you can stay in that stinky thing the whole day if you really want to. I just thought that you might want an extra pair of clothes.” Joe said to me.

I gave him a dumb look. “Um, I need your help getting out of bed, dumb ass. I’m still sore.” I said.

Realization came over his face. “Oh! That’s right!” Joe took the clothes from me and put them on a little side table that was right next to the bed. Then he pulled the covers off of me. Slowly, I turned myself to the right and let my feet dangle off the bed. Joe took my hands with his and slowly and steadily lifted me off the bed so that I was now standing. He didn’t yet let go of my hands since it had been a while since I last walked.

“You feel okay?” He asked me.

I tried to steady myself so I wouldn’t fall. “Yeah, I think I’ll be alright.”

“Would you like me to walk you to the bathroom?”

“No, no, no. I’ll be fine. Thanks, though.” I smiled up at him. His expression didn’t change.

“No problem. I just want to make sure that you don’t fall.” He slowly let go of my hands. He stood in front of me for a few seconds just to make sure I wouldn’t fall, and then he moved out of the way. I think it’s kind of cute how he worries about me.

I grabbed the clothes off the bed and wobbled over to the tiny bathroom they had in here. Once I closed the door, I looked at the outfit that Joe had picked out for me. I was expecting something revealing, but instead found a pink baggy shirt sleeve cheer leading shirt that I had gotten from school when I was on the team. It had the words CADETS written in silver on the front, which was the name of our school mascot, or team, or whatever you wanted to call the main theme of our school. There was also jean Bermuda shorts with the ends rolled up. This was actually… a pretty decent outfit. It’s nice to think about how he cares enough about me to not only want to see me in revealing clothes and that he would actually pick something that I would wear just lounging around the house with. It really makes me feel loved.

I very slowly changed into my outfit, since I could barely pull the shirt over my head. That part took forever. It also hurt to bed down, but not as much.

When I walked out of the bathroom, I saw Joe lying down on the bed with his legs dangling off the side and his arms were wrapped under his head. When I walked over to him, his eyes were closed. Was he sleeping?

“Joe.” I said. He didn’t answer. Hmm… I guess he is sleeping. I put my clothes down on a chair and next to the bed and laid myself down next to Joe. I lay down on my side and propped myself up on my left arm. I just stayed like that, staring at Joe’s gorgeous self sleeping. He looks so peaceful when he sleeps. The way his chest moves up and down. The way his breathing sounds in the dead silence. The way his face looked like the definition of comfort, like he was having the best sleep of his life. He probably was, now that I think about it. I kept him up for so long while I was in the hospital that he never slept. And on top of it all, he still had to finish the “surprise” he was giving me. Sudden guilt washed over my entire body.

I kept him up all this time. I’m the reason why he hasn’t slept in days. I’m the reason for all his running around and being busy. I never even gave him a chance to explain himself when all along it was for me.

That makes me feel like such a douche-bag! Now not only am I a bitch, but I’m also a douche-bag. How wonderful is that.

I frowned at myself and carefully cuddled into Joe’s side. I didn’t want to wake him up. He deserved some sleep after all the trouble that I caused him. I put my hand on his chest and rested my head in the crook of his neck and then closed my eyes. I felt Joe’s head move slowly towards me and then felt his nose on my cheek, our foreheads touching. He then heaved out this one big breath. It felt warm on my face and smelled like syrup. He must have had pancakes or something for lunch. That’s always the best, having breakfast for lunch or dinner. Maybe one day I’ll try having a cheeseburger or something like that for breakfast, and then eat pancakes for dinner. That would be awesome!

A smile made it’s way on my face as I thought about this moment. Right here, right now. Just the smallest of things, like cuddling with your boyfriend, can be the best moments of your life. It’s like I want to capture this moment forever and never stop living in it. I wish our minds were made with built in cameras so this way we could just snap a picture or record something without even having to worry about buying a camcorder for all that. Because it’s moments like these that are worth the most wasting your film for. The moments that you could just live in forever.

And as I lay here, listening to his breathing and smelling the faint scent of syrup in his breath, I can’t help but feel like I’m falling for him even more. I literally can’t imagine myself without him. Just the thought makes me want to jump out a window to stop the pain. My life would be over. It would all be over. There would be no point in living if Joe wasn’t in it.

Joe was my life. My everything.