Make A Name For Yourself

(Brendon's Point of View)

I sat on my bunk, thinking things over. I was so close to asking her. Why did Ingrid have to ruin it? I bet Ryan knew I was going to ask her, and he made Ingrid interrupt us. What am I kidding? He would never do that…right? I heard the familiar sound of my phone ringing. Having to think for a minute to whether I take the call or not, I pressed the lime green phone on my phone.

"Hello?"

"Brendon?" It couldn't be.

"Audrey?"

"Was I interrupting something?"

"No, no. What's up?"

"I wanted to talk to you. About us," She said stressing the word us.

"There is no more us, by your decision."

"I've changed my mind." She said. I thought for a few minutes. She changed her mind?

"What do you mean by that?" I knew what she meant, but I wanted to hear her confirm it.

"I want to be with you again Brendon."

"Okay."

"Do you want to be with me?"

"Yeah," I said without thinking.

"Can I come on tour with you? I'll meet you tomorrow."

"Sure."

"Okay. I have to go, goodnight Brendon." I heard her hang up her phone before I could respond.

Usually when you get back together with a girl you fell in love with, you would be happy. But I wasn't. How could I do that? I liked Lexi. Liked. But I loved Audrey. Plus, my feelings for Lexi could be just a crush. No big deal…right? I seemed to be questioning myself lately. The conversation I had with Ryan earlier rang through my ears.

"Shit. Ryan's going to kill me."

"Why's Ryan gonna kill you." I heard Ryan say coming into the room.

"Uh, no reason."

"Uh yeah there is." Ryan said mimicking me. "There is always a reason for someone to kill another."

"Well…"

"Spit it out."

"Audrey's coming."

"As in Audrey Kitching?"

"Yeah," I said looking down.

"Why?" He asked bewildered.

"We're going out again." I said even more ashamed.

"Are you an idiot?!"

"I don't know."

"The answer is yes. I thought you liked Alexis?"

"I do. I just have stronger feelings for Aud though." Ryan sighed a sigh that was full of anger and frustration.

"Whatever. Fuck up a good relationship that could be."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Figure it out yourself. You don't need my input anymore. You seem to be doing fine without help." With that he stormed out of the room. I stared at the door. What if Lexi heard?

Stop it Brendon you have Audrey now.

Yeah. I do. But deep down, I still wondered how she felt.

"Hey Bren." I heard the angelic voice of Alexis say.

"Hey."

"Is something wrong?"

"No, why?"

"No reason. So what did you want to talk about earlier?" Oh shit.

"It was uh," I tried coming up with another question, but found it terribly hard.
"I wanted to know if you wanted to come and pick up my girlfriend from the airport tomorrow?" I said once again without thinking, I sure had to start thinking before I spoke. Her face instantly fell, and her eyes were overcome with sadness. Damn.

"Oh, um. I have to, um, practice a new song we're performing tomorrow. It's new you know, I want to make sure I don't mess up. Yeah that's what I'm doing so I can't. Sorry." She said forced.

"Ok, okay."

"Well, I came in just to uh, get my sketchbook, yeah that." She grabbed her book, and left.

Great, now she was upset. Why don't I get everyone to hate me? It'll sure be easy to do. I laid down, and tried to fall asleep, but no matter how hard I tried I just couldn't. I heard everyone else come in to also go to sleep. I pretended to sleep until I was assured they all were actually sleeping. I quietly got up, and got myself a glass of water.

"Can't sleep?" The raspy voice startled me, but as my vision adjusted to the dark I found it was Alexis.

"No."

"I couldn't either." She said all in the same tone. I walked over to where she was sitting.

"Mind if I sit down?"

"No," After a few minutes of complete awkward silence Alexis decided to break it.
"Ever wonder what it'd be like if you never became famous or anything?"

"Sometimes, people would still treat me like shit."

"Yeah, I'm not exactly famous, but getting there. I can feel a change already."

"That's what you want to be right, famous?"

"Not exactly, I want to help people with their crummy lives; using music. Ever since I was young I would turn to music for answers, or just to help me through stuff." I listened intently as she spoke. She had been crying, no doubt about that.
"Right now, there is no music to help me through anything right now."

She got up and headed to the door. "I need to walk. If anyone asks."

With that she left into the darkness at two o'clock in the morning. If anything I wanted to run after her, but I knew I was the main cause of her pain. I didn't want to bring more. I got up, and headed back to my bunk. I bumped into someone on the way. Ryan.

"Where'd she go?" He asked groggily.

"For a walk."

"Is she okay?"

"I don't know." I said hesitantly.

"Okay. I'll wait out here until she gets back." He said more awake.

"Okay. Night Ry."

"Night Bren."