Love You Like I Do
Chapter 10
The group came back to Johnny's house, mostly drunk. Out to the patio for a night of good times...maybe.
By 1 in the morning, Rake and Raab had passed out in their beds.
"I wanna go to Disney tomorrow." Bam laughed.
"Okay Bam. I'll take you myself." Ville smiled about as drunk.
"Your on your own." Johnny said.
Bam shrugged. "What, you don't wanna go to the gayest place on earth with us?" Bam asked.
"Count me out." Ryan said laughing.
Novak was to drunk to comprehend the conversation. But, was laughing anyway.
Bam just started laughing.
"Bam love..." Ville said sitting on Bam's lap. "Your drunk."
"Your not?" Bam said.
Ville shrugged.
Johnny cleared his throat. Ryan lifted an eyebrow looking at him.
"What?" Bam asked. "Anything you can say to me you can say with Ville here."
Ville got up and sat in the seat next to Bam. "Bam don't--"
"You guys always judge us. So fucking what..." Bam started.
"Bam, calm down it's nothing--" Johnny said.
"No. I'm tired of you judging me for being gay. I'm sick of being put down for that. I'm sick of you judging Ville and saying he's messing me up and making me cut myself. It's not Ville's fault that I'm fucked up in the head."
"Cut yourself?" Ville questioned, eyeing the drunken man beside him.
"What? Ha, I don't do that anymore..." Bam said trying to laugh.
"Then why don't you show me your wrists?"
"Psh, what for?" Bam said clutching his arm.
"Cause you're a dirty fucking liar!" Ville said standing.
"Ville--"
"You said...you said you stopped! You said...Bam!" Ville exclaimed.
"I don't!"
"Valehtelija!"
"Quit talking in Finnish," Bam said standing almost 2 inches shorter then Ville, "I can't understand you. You know your in America."
"Only to see your ass. That way you didn't get depressed and hurt yourself. But, little did I know you were doing it anyway!"
"You didn't even notice the wristband on all the time. When I was swimming, even when we were fucking! Are you that stupid?"
"Stupid? I'm not around you--"
"That's exactly it! You're not around! I love you Ville and I want to be with you all the time..."
"I told you--"
"But, I don't want to hear it. I know."
"Bam...why--"
"Why? Because I miss you. That's why?"
Ville grabbed Bam's arm and pulled off the wrist band revealing old and fresh cuts. It was clear that they were very fresh. "I'm right here." Ville said wanting to cry but holding back.
"You wouldn't understand!"
"I wouldn't understand?!"
Bam just burst out into drunken tears and staggered into the house, carrying a beer bottle.
"Bam..." Ville said following him.
There was a silence for the moment.
"What the fuck just happened?" Johnny said looking at the other 4 silent adults.
"This happens every time Ville comes to Pennsylvania." Ryan said.
"When they're drunk." Dico added.
Johnny looked around. "They need to fucking...get a hold of life."
By 1 in the morning, Rake and Raab had passed out in their beds.
"I wanna go to Disney tomorrow." Bam laughed.
"Okay Bam. I'll take you myself." Ville smiled about as drunk.
"Your on your own." Johnny said.
Bam shrugged. "What, you don't wanna go to the gayest place on earth with us?" Bam asked.
"Count me out." Ryan said laughing.
Novak was to drunk to comprehend the conversation. But, was laughing anyway.
Bam just started laughing.
"Bam love..." Ville said sitting on Bam's lap. "Your drunk."
"Your not?" Bam said.
Ville shrugged.
Johnny cleared his throat. Ryan lifted an eyebrow looking at him.
"What?" Bam asked. "Anything you can say to me you can say with Ville here."
Ville got up and sat in the seat next to Bam. "Bam don't--"
"You guys always judge us. So fucking what..." Bam started.
"Bam, calm down it's nothing--" Johnny said.
"No. I'm tired of you judging me for being gay. I'm sick of being put down for that. I'm sick of you judging Ville and saying he's messing me up and making me cut myself. It's not Ville's fault that I'm fucked up in the head."
"Cut yourself?" Ville questioned, eyeing the drunken man beside him.
"What? Ha, I don't do that anymore..." Bam said trying to laugh.
"Then why don't you show me your wrists?"
"Psh, what for?" Bam said clutching his arm.
"Cause you're a dirty fucking liar!" Ville said standing.
"Ville--"
"You said...you said you stopped! You said...Bam!" Ville exclaimed.
"I don't!"
"Valehtelija!"
"Quit talking in Finnish," Bam said standing almost 2 inches shorter then Ville, "I can't understand you. You know your in America."
"Only to see your ass. That way you didn't get depressed and hurt yourself. But, little did I know you were doing it anyway!"
"You didn't even notice the wristband on all the time. When I was swimming, even when we were fucking! Are you that stupid?"
"Stupid? I'm not around you--"
"That's exactly it! You're not around! I love you Ville and I want to be with you all the time..."
"I told you--"
"But, I don't want to hear it. I know."
"Bam...why--"
"Why? Because I miss you. That's why?"
Ville grabbed Bam's arm and pulled off the wrist band revealing old and fresh cuts. It was clear that they were very fresh. "I'm right here." Ville said wanting to cry but holding back.
"You wouldn't understand!"
"I wouldn't understand?!"
Bam just burst out into drunken tears and staggered into the house, carrying a beer bottle.
"Bam..." Ville said following him.
There was a silence for the moment.
"What the fuck just happened?" Johnny said looking at the other 4 silent adults.
"This happens every time Ville comes to Pennsylvania." Ryan said.
"When they're drunk." Dico added.
Johnny looked around. "They need to fucking...get a hold of life."