Secrets Are Hard To Keep

I wasn’t ready. Anyone with eye sight could see that. He was right in my path, right in front of me with his piercing eyes boring into mine. He caught my stare and I couldn’t look away. My heart was beating like a snare drum in my chest and I was completely frozen in my spot.

Nick was stood near a palm tree, hiding from the residents who walked past without a clue that their idol was stood within their grasp. I couldn’t pull myself together enough to form a sentence. Remember those walls I built? They didn’t even put up a fight, they couldn’t fight against Nick. Ever. No matter how much cement I had between them it just crumbled like sand beneath feet, not even bothering to try.

“Can we talk please?” Nick croaked as I gazed at him. “Please?”

“Not now.” I whispered and finally tore my eyes away from his glorious face. I noticed his hands were twitching, he clenched his fingers into his palm and his knuckles turn a shade of white.

“I really need to talk to you now.”

I did the first thing I could think of. “Sorry.” I told him. I turned my head and waited for a nice sized group of girls. He caught on.

“Julia…” He warned.

I screamed, perfectly imitating a Jonas Brothers fan. “NICK JONAS!” I shouted and then ran as every girl within hearing distance turned and rushed over, screaming. I didn’t turn back to see what damage I had caused, I ran to my families private cove and grabbed my bag no bothering to look at my parents.

But when I did, I almost died. “So this was your plan then!” I shouted at my mother who sat with the whole Jonas family, minus Nick. “Bring me here, have yourself a happy time while every fibre of my being tears itself to shreds!” I was beyond furious with my self and the whole of my family and Nick’s that I had started crying.

“Julia, you need to calm down.” My Dad said seriously walking over to me. “Now.”

“You have no right to tell me what to do! This is all your fault. Making me think you cared about me, that you wanted me to be happy--”

“Julia.” Kevin said rushing to silence me.

“Don’t get me started on you.” I growled then glared at my mother. “Why would you bring me here?” I whispered to her. “Why?” I shouted again. Every ounce of anger was pouring out of me, everything I’d held in was coming out now and it was obvious that this wouldn’t have been half as bad if I didn’t bottle it all up. But I did and I was paying the consequences. “For your own amusement? Do you get a kick out of this--”

“Right, that’s it.” Joe announced standing up from his chair. “Come on.” He grabbed a hold of my hand and pulled me away, I didn’t put up a fight.

Joe skilfully took off his black cardigan and put it around my shoulder whilst keeping one hand on me at all times. We walked speedily through the lobby, a bit too fast. My feet were still wet so I slid over on the marble floor but Joe quickly pulled me up.

I felt totally embarrassed at what I had just done. I was so embarrassed I started crying in the elevator. Joe bundled me up in his arms and let me cry into his shoulder soaking his white v-neck shirt. Any dignity I had left was gone as Joe picked me up and carried me down the corridor to his room.

He didn’t let go of me once we got inside, he tossed his key card onto a table and sat down with me in his lap on a sofa. I rested my head on his right shoulder and I placed my hand on the left side of his neck.

I’d just screamed at my parents like a spoilt brat in front of the Jonas family who probably weren’t that impressed with me for leaving their son and not to mention the fact I just got him mobbed by fans. I made my Mum cry and my Dad probably hates me too. Kevin, Paul and Denise were probably disappointed in me and poor Joe must be so pissed off at me.

Reviewing all the damage I had caused brought on another round of tears, but they were just silently crawling down my cheeks. “Shhh, it’s okay.” Joe cooed moving his left hand from my waist to my leg, he rubbed it sweetly. It was kind of soothing. “Calm down, your heart is beating so fast.”

Was it? I hadn’t noticed.

“Thanks.” I mumbled against his neck.

“Don’t worry about it, you’re like my sister.” I wiped my tears with the sleeve of Joe’s cardigan. “What happened back there?”

“I don’t know. I just got so… angry.” I told him guiltily. “I feel so horrible.”

“Just chill out, you’re a bag of nerves.” Joe laughed and pulled his Blackberry out of his pocket. “Play on brick breaker.”

I did as he told. It helped, I was focusing so hard on getting the ball back up in the air all my thoughts had dwelled out. My shoulders dropped into a relaxing position and I sunk into Joe's embrace easier with all my muscles loosened.

“You’re supposed to catch them blue things.” Joe sighed playfully.

“And you’re supposed to keep the ball in the air first.” I retorted and I caught him smirking out of the corner of my eye.

Joe slid me from his lap and I paused the game, “I’m just answering the door.” The doorbell rang? I didn’t notice. I resumed the game so something could consume my thoughts. I had to focus even more now because my hands were shaking as more voices were noticeable.

Then the door closed and one set of footsteps came back. “I think I’m getting the hang of this Joe.” I smiled and bit my bottom lip as multiple balls shot around the screen. “Hey!” I exclaimed as a hand pulled the Blackberry away from me.

I tilted my head up to glare at Joe. “It’s not Joe.” Nick announced as if it wasn’t obvious. “Are you okay?”

Of course he would be worried about me. “I’m just fantastic.” I said sarcastically. Buttoning up Joe’s cardigan I felt Nick sit down beside me and my heart soared. “Yourself?”

“No blood.” I could feel him watching me as I played with my toes. “How was your alone time?”

“Nick, spit whatever it is you’re trying to say out you’re sending me asleep with all this mindless babble.” I knew being cocky wasn’t the best idea, but it made me feel better to know he could see I wasn’t the complete wreck I was on the inside.

“I have something for you.” Nick reached into his pocket and pulled out a shiny diamond ring. My shiny diamond ring. I didn’t look at it for long, Nick was in front of me which was a major distraction. “Aunt Catherine brought it round a few days after you left. She said she found it in Emily’s room and knew it couldn’t have been hers.”

I didn’t care, I was waiting for my apology. I held out my palm and Nick placed my ring into it, I slid it on my right ring finger and watched it glisten in the light. “Thanks.” I mumbled.

I felt Nick's hands move up my arms, across my neck and then they stopped on either side of my head. Enjoying the feeling of him touching me, I closed my eyes. “I’m so sorry. I can’t put into words how horrible I feel about everything. I’m sorry I shouted at you, I’m sorry for every tear that fell because of me, I’m sorry for hurting you.

I opened my eyes and gazed into his. Everything he was trying to say was in his eyes, I took a big strike to the heart as I saw the agony in them.

“You’re my most valued entity.”

My heart began to warm at his sensitive words. “You’re driving me crazy but I’m so unbalanced without you.” I took a deep breath and looked down, “Okay.” I squeezed my eyes shut and opened them again.

“Okay what?” Nick asked urgently.

“Okay, I forgive you.” So quickly I didn’t even see it coming. He had dived on me and embraced me in his arms. We fell onto the floor with a bang, “Ow, carpet burn.” I giggled honestly for the first time in a long time.

“You know, you’re the most amazing person I’ve ever met.” I smiled up at his childish face. I closed my eyes peacefully. “Julia, open your eyes.” I obeyed. His face was closer than I expected, I gasped but shock soon turned into happiness. I snuck my arms out of his grasp and I place my hands on his neck. I pulled down gently and he got the gist.

Kissing Nick for the first time in around a full week was like the first time of eating chocolate after being on a diet for months. His lips opened and then closed down on mine and they melted into one. He let his weight fall on me as he kissed me more furiously and urgently. We both opened our mouths at the same time and his tongue grazed mine slowly and softly. There was no ‘battles for dominance’ we were both content to kiss slowly, savouring the moment of peace and reunion. We weren’t animals.

When the kiss ended, he gave me an Eskimo kiss. He rubbed his nose against mine and I scrunched my nose up at the tickling sensation it caused. He laughed successfully and planted another kiss on my lips.

He crawled off of me to his feet then pulled me up too. “You’re wearing Joe’s cardigan.”

“Yeah, he smells nice.” I observed Nick’s face, he raised an eye brow at me and crossed his arms. “You smell better though, obviously.” I added and smirked at him. “I better go apologise to my Mum and Dad.”

“That would be a good idea. I’m going to change into some swimming trunks.” He smiled at me as I walked away. I swung the door open and saluted him before closing it again.

“Hi.” I said to Joe and Kevin who stood outside the door. “Sorry about earlier Kevin I--”

“Don’t apologise, come snorkelling with us in the coral reefs.”

“Done.” I smiled and gave them both a hug. I took off Joe’s cardigan and tossed it to him, “Thanks a lot Joe.” I smiled at him and he smiled back.

“Anytime.” I ran down the corridor and took the stairs two floors up. I anxiously waited outside my Mum’s door and listened to them talk.

“She’s just upset David, once they sort things out she’ll be back to normal.” My Mum sighed, she sounded exhausted.

“Maybe we should just take her home.”

No! I banged on the door loudly and saw someone look through the peep hole. A chain was unlocked and the door swung open. “Hey sweetie.” My Dad smiled at me, why isn’t he yelling?

“Aren’t you going to shout at me?” I asked looking down at my feet. To my surprise he wrapped me up in a hug.

“You’re upset, we understand.” My Mum told me as she joined in our hug. “Nick really loves you.”

“I know he does.” I admitted and the looked at me oddly. “We sat and talked. Everything is good, you’ll be pleased to know.”

“Are you happy?” My Dad asked and I nodded, “Then we’re happy.”

I hugged them both and the grabbed my bag from their bed, “I’m going snorkelling with him. You know, catching up and stuff.”

“Okay sweetie.” I kissed them both, something I rarely did, and ran down the corridor to my room.

I tugged a brush through my hair and tied it all back neatly. I decided bare foot would be fine and I answered all my emails. A knock on the door shot me up from my bed and across the hotel suite.

“Ready to go?” Nick asked. I was momentarily dazed by his bare torso. He held up the shirt he was wearing earlier. I shoved my arms through the rolled up sleeves and buttoned it up leaving the top three open so my bikini top was visible, “Sexy.”

I blushed and kissed him gently. “Where are Joe and Kevin?” I asked as Nick laced his hand with mine as we walked down the stairs. I put on a pair of white rimmed Ray Bans and Nick wore a pair of black tinted Ray Bans aviators.

“They’re getting ready, we’re going to chill by the pool while they do their hairs.” He chuckled.

Security were strategically placed around the resort as Nick and I walked hand in hand for the first time ever in public. We wanted to keep a hold on each other and if that meant no privacy, so be it. I don’t know if people got pictures but they definitely saw, as soon as someone came too close security would appear from no where and back them off.

When we got to the cove away from everyone I dropped my stuff on a sun bed and wiggled my toes in the sand. I tossed Nick’s shirt onto the beach and smiled as the sun attacked my skin. Nick put his iPod into a speaker system and Jason Mraz's song 'I'm Yours' played as we sat opposite each other in the sand. Nick kept snapping random pictures of me.

“Nick people are crowding the entrance.” I told him nodding behind his shoulder, he turned around and saw security trying to get people away. Some of the girls were crying, it was extraordinary.

“Security will sort it.” He stood up and held out his hand. He pulled me up from the sand and helped me brush it off my legs. Nick sat down on a sun bed and opened his legs, he patted the space between them motioning for me to sit. I skipped over and laid against his chest, he tapped his hands on my thighs in time with the beat in the song.

“Before the cool done run out, I'll be giving it my bestest.” I sung as I flicked through the pictures Nick had taken of me. He pulled the camera from my hands and snapped some of us together. “I reckon it's about my turn, to win some or learn some.” I belted out.

"So I won't hesitate no more!" Joe sung suddenly appearing. I waved to him and pointed behind him. As soon as he turned around Kevin pushed him forward into the shallow water. It was basically a fake beach so Joe hit his face on the floor.

I let out a laugh and shook my head. Idiot.