Show Me The Light In This Dark World
Chapter Three
25/4/05
I didn't sleep. I had a nightmare. I kept seeing the men's faces grinning at me as they…Anyway. I'm still tired and I hate it here. I hate what I have to do. I hate the fact I can't run away. I hate the fact my family did this to me, gave me away to this horrible, dark world.
I think my English is getting better already. I've picked it up quite fast, I had to. You don't get a choice when you live in a country that speaks it. I'm aloud/allowed out sometimes, but I can't go very far. A man comes with me to make sure I don't run. The cars still scare me because they go so fast. And it's all still so noisy. I miss the peace and quiet of home.
I have to go.
28/4/05
I hate my life. I've stopped talking. I have no reason to speak. I just let them do what they want. I've stopped struggling. There's no point.
30/4/05
I heard a song today. The words really hit me, like the man last night but in a good way. "To be hurt, to feel lost, to be left out in the dark…" I think that's some of it. It went on like that, I love it. I want to know what it's called.
I still haven't spoken. But no one seems to care. They just let me sit around doing nothing. Sometimes they poke me, to see if I'll do anything. If I squeak they turn it into a game. It's like I'm an animal, trapped in a cage. Nowhere to go and hide. I feel like a person standing at a station, waiting for a train that will never come.
No one's going to save me from this. I'm stuck in this for life.
I didn't sleep. I had a nightmare. I kept seeing the men's faces grinning at me as they…Anyway. I'm still tired and I hate it here. I hate what I have to do. I hate the fact I can't run away. I hate the fact my family did this to me, gave me away to this horrible, dark world.
I think my English is getting better already. I've picked it up quite fast, I had to. You don't get a choice when you live in a country that speaks it. I'm aloud/allowed out sometimes, but I can't go very far. A man comes with me to make sure I don't run. The cars still scare me because they go so fast. And it's all still so noisy. I miss the peace and quiet of home.
I have to go.
28/4/05
I hate my life. I've stopped talking. I have no reason to speak. I just let them do what they want. I've stopped struggling. There's no point.
30/4/05
I heard a song today. The words really hit me, like the man last night but in a good way. "To be hurt, to feel lost, to be left out in the dark…" I think that's some of it. It went on like that, I love it. I want to know what it's called.
I still haven't spoken. But no one seems to care. They just let me sit around doing nothing. Sometimes they poke me, to see if I'll do anything. If I squeak they turn it into a game. It's like I'm an animal, trapped in a cage. Nowhere to go and hide. I feel like a person standing at a station, waiting for a train that will never come.
No one's going to save me from this. I'm stuck in this for life.