Rise Above This

Dear Carolyn,

Fourth grade is when it started to all go downhill. Childhood innocence was forgotten and growing up was suddenly your biggest priority. You were the clichéd four-eyed freak who had a slight lazy eye. You had braces. And you didn’t know how to dress, put on makeup, or pluck your eyebrows.

But you know what? When that lazy eye slowly righted itself in sixth grade, those glasses were replaced by contacts in seventh grade, and those braces came off during the summer before eighth, you felt and looked more beautiful than you ever had since fourth grade. And you were. No, you still are.

No one was really taught how to stick up for someone else in your school when you were bullied from fourth to seventh grade. They watched as you were called demented cow. They watched as your glasses were torn from your face and stomped on beneath someone’s shoes on the pavement at recess. But you know what? It made you so much stronger than what you were then. It made you a better person.

High school summed up your fears of everything that could possibly go wrong.

You developed a crush on Steve in computer class. And you might have just been a freshman, but you know when someone liked someone else. Steve was reciprocating the small feelings you had for him. You slowly realized that the feelings you had for him were nothing more than emotions developed from positive attention from a boy. You didn’t really get that a lot.

Also in the same class, Ryan was the first boy to tell you that he loved you. You might not have realized it, blowing it off with a laugh and a playful shrug at first reaction, but a mutual friend later told you Ryan was serious. That was the first heart you broke.

You met a girl named Sarah who gave you her life story. It was a horrible one. You thought she trusted only you in these things but then she turned around and told others. You told her she was your best friend. She blew you off and said you weren’t hers. She had a best friend back at home. You friendship to this day is tense; she continually uses you.

Starting in sophomore year, you fell hard for one of your best friends, Drew. And again, there was mutual attraction. You thought that maybe this could go somewhere. But no. Long story short: you felt obliged to get over him for one of your good friends, Lily. You’re still friends with Drew but not so much with Lily. You still talk, but not as much as you used to.

Sophomore year also brought you your best friend Molly. You love her to death. She is such a breath of fresh air. She understands you. She listens to the exact same music as you do. You laugh at the same things. She's immature and mature with you at exactly the same time. Phillip the Pickle is your chocolate ice cream. This is a friendship forever.

Ah, junior year. You’re currently sitting not so comfortably in this year. College is pressuring you from all sides: emails upon emails and letters upon letters; all copy and pasted just titled with a different name. The economy sucks and you need a job to pay for gas. What’s worse is that you seem to always fall into a depression whenever someone really hurts you. Angst is terribly annoying. You’re stubborn and never show your real feelings. You’re a pushover and let people use you to please them. You write horribly depressing drabbles…

Writing this right now, the only happy thing you could possibly see in the future is Molly and that We the Kings concert next Friday.

You know Carolyn? Being a teenager sucks. Everyone knows that. Everyone goes through it. You fall in love with best friends. You break hearts. You’re pressured. You’re used. You question your sexuality because of one of your best friends.Wait what?

You’ll get through this hon. I know you will. All these things that you have done are just preparing you for what’s next. You’re so strong doll. Don’t forget, you have Molly (I swear to God you cuddle more than real couples do). Open up to her more. You can trust her and you know it. And those drabbles of yours? Whatever gets you through the night. It’s just a faze. Make sure to send yourself a Valentine’s Day card and look out for yours in that Paramore video.

I love you. So much.

Carolyn

P.S. You keep exercising that booty so you see Drew Thomsen’s face drop next Friday 8P That sexy man deserves a sexy woman. And you know it.