Losing the Feeling of Feeling Unique

Both Brendon and Spencer stood up, alarmed at the turn of events. Rather unfortunately for me, I was still sitting on Brendon’s lap, so I ended up in a heap on the floor.

Ignoring Brendon’s futile attempts to lift me up, I stayed on the floor, waiting for something else to happen. I was completely bewildered by Jon’s outburst, only moments before we had all been relaxing and getting along, and know the atmosphere was anything but happy. I didn’t want to admit it, but the probability that the argument had somehow been caused by me was quite high, and I felt nervous.

Brendon, Spencer and I all watched as Jon stormed around the room, picking up various items of his clothing that had been removed whilst we’d played poker, and putting them on. Without uttering a word, he slid some flip-flops on and pulled a jumper over his red v-neck t-shirt, before storming out of the hotel room. The whole room shook as the door slammed behind him.

A second later, and in total contrast to Jon, Ryan emerged slowly and quietly from the other room, looking almost confused, and as though he was trying very hard to stay calm. Spencer strode over and put one hand on his shoulder.

‘Ry? What the fuck just happened?’ Spencer sounded apprehensive, we all were.

‘Yeah,’ piped up Brendon. ‘Are we missing something?’

He remained silent and merely walked over to the sofa and sank hopelessly into the cushions.

Brendon and Spencer exchanged a confused glance at each other, then at Ryan, then at me. The way they were looking at me, as though they were sympathetic, made me feel uncomfortable.

‘Err…listen, I’m going to go. I’ll call you tomorrow, Ry, okay?’

He looked up at me and smiled half-heartedly before standing up and walking over to me, and then wrapping his arms tightly around me. I returned the gesture, before kissing him on the cheek, waving goodbye to Brendon and Spencer and then quietly exiting the room.

Stepping into the lift, my mind was practically flooded with thoughts of what could have happened between Jon and Ryan. It scared me how quickly the mood had changed; how angry Jon had been; how subdued Ryan had been.

I pushed the ground floor button on the lift impatiently, eager to get back home, so I could forget about whatever the hell had just happened, at least for the night.

The door slid open and I marched out of the lift and approached the hotel entrance, pulling my coat tighter around me and wrapping my scarf around my neck in preparation for the bitter wind that I knew was awaiting me outside.

‘Ruby?’

I stopped and stared blankly around the lobby, searching for the person that had spoken. There were two tourists checking in, a blonde woman making her way towards the lift and…Jon.

He was sitting on the black, leather sofa that was to the left of the hotel entrance, in my haste to leave, I had almost ignored him completely.

‘Are you going?’ He asked casually, but I was sure I could hear a hint of sadness and regret in his voice.

‘I was…but I can stay for a bit?’ His face lit up, and he patted the seat next to him. I obligingly walked over and sat down, giving him a hug and pecking him on the cheek as I did so.

He was silent for a minute, and I placed a hand on his shoulder.

‘Jon, what happened upstairs? Why did you storm out? D - did I do something?’

He looked up alarmed and gripped my hand.

‘Of course not! Don’t think that, we just…had a disagreement. You didn’t do anything wrong…you couldn’t.’

I blushed under the intensity of his gaze and cleared my throat awkwardly. I didn’t know why he was making me so nervous, I’d been fine with the other boys, but there was something about Jon.

I couldn’t think of anything to say, so I waited for him to break the silence.

‘So, you had fun today? Sorry about earlier, you know, the whole…nakedness thing.’

I laughed as his cheeks became tinged with pink, and leant my head on his shoulder, exhaling.

‘Yeah, it was such a nice day, you guys are so fun to hang out with.’

‘I’m glad! I’d hate to think we bored you!’

‘Oh, like that would happen, especially when there’s strip poker to be played!’

We both laughed and continued talking, about anything and everything, he was so easy to talk to, and it almost shocked me how comfortable I felt around him, it was like I’d known him more years. Something about his brown eyes just made me instantly trust him.

After talking for a while, we suddenly became aware of the time, and I decided that I needed to get home.

He stood up and walked me the few paces to the hotel entrance; I turned around to face him.

‘Thanks, Jon, I had a wonderful time.’

He leaned down and gave me a huge hug, then cautiously leaned down and pressed his lips to mine. After a few seconds he pulled away, but I could still feel his lips on mine.

‘Listen, I err…don’t suppose you want to go out for dinner with me sometime do you?’

‘Dinner? With you?’ I said, shocked.

His face fell.

‘Oh. Err…don’t worry, you don’t have to, I was just wonder-’

‘Jon.’ I said, cutting him off. ‘I’d love to.’

‘Really?’

‘Really.’ I beamed at him, and he grinned back, before I silently turned around and walked out the door, blissfully unaware of the bitter cold as I was overtaken with unexplainable happiness.

- - - - -

JON’S POV

As I made my way into the lift and back upstairs, the smile slowly began to leave my face as I thought of how Ryan would react to the latest developments.

I sighed as I turned into the corridor that our room was located on, and tried to keep calm as I entered the room.

I was relieved to find that Ryan was nowhere in sight when I arrived. Instead I found Spencer and Brendon playing a ferocious game of snap.

As soon as they heard the door close behind me they looked up. I smiled at them and proceeded to sit with them at the table.

They took to begin their interrogation.

‘Where the hell have you been?’

‘Why did you storm out earlier?’

‘Are you and Ryan pissed at each other?’

‘What happened? He won’t say anything.’

I cleared my throat, hoping they’d take the hint and shut up. Fortunately, they did.

‘First of all, Ryan’s pissed at me, I didn’t do anything to him, he’s just being an idiot today. Secondly, I stormed out because Ryan was pissing me off. Thirdly, I was in the lobby with Ruby.’

‘Ruby? Why?’ Spencer asked suddenly alarmed.

I didn’t get a chance to reply, because at that moment Ryan stormed in from the other room. I hadn’t been aware that he was there, and mentally thanked Spencer and Brendon for the heads up, or lack thereof.

‘What the FUCK were you doing with my sister?!’ He shouted.

‘God, Ryan, don’t start again, we just talked-’

‘BULLSHIT! I don’t want you getting involved with her!’

‘Why the hell shouldn’t I?’

‘Because I know how you are with girls! You’ll get bored, or you’ll use her, or you’ll cheat on her! You ALWAYS do!’

‘But Ryan,’ I attempted to reason with him. ‘This is different, I really like her-’

‘Cut the crap, Jon, you’re one of my best friends, but there’s no point denying it, I know you, and I know how you treat girls. I’m not prepared to stand by and watch as you fuck with her heart!’

I cried out in frustration.

‘God, Ryan! Get a grip! You’re being a total jerk about this!’

‘Can you blame me? We all stood by and watched as you cheated on Jenny, Claire, Megan… countless other girls before that! I’m not going to let you add my sister to that list!’

I was shocked into silence, I’d never realised that they had such a low opinion of me, I turned around to face Spencer and Brendon, who both had expressions that told me they’d been thinking exactly the same thing.

‘Fine!’ I shouted angrily. ‘Be like that! I actually happen to like Ruby! But if you feel that way, maybe you should warn her what an asshole I am before we go out for dinner!’

And with that, I stormed out of the room for the second time that day.