Love as Bitter as It Ever Was

I stayed under my blanket for many hours close to Kale.

I think I was starting to get used to his smell but I think if I was away in fresh air and then came back to him it would be just as bad as when I met him.

I had no idea where we were moving to and I didn’t like it.

I didn’t like moving away from knowing how to get back to Donovan and Emery.

Even though I wasn’t moving myself or losing blood I could feel myself getting weaker and weaker as the hours ticked by.

In the end I felt so weak that I just shut my eyes and drifted off to sleep.

“Kailli, Kailli!” someone was shouting in my ear and shaking me, it hurt.

I managed to open my eyes to see his stunning blue eyes, there were many things I could admire about Kale and his eyes were one.

“Tired” I managed to say and then I closed my eyes again “No Kailli wake up I have something for you” he replied sitting me up against his side.

I rested my head on his shoulder since I wasn’t strong enough to do it myself, he didn’t smell that bad at all.

“Drink” he said almost as if disgusted him and then held a cup up to my lips.

The beautiful, magical scent of metallic blood wafted up from the cup, I smiled and gladly drank what he gave me, but it wasn’t enough though.

They were keeping me weak, they all thought that I’d either kill them or run away but I had made a promise, I promised I would stay with Kale if they didn’t kill Donovan and they didn’t.

“Thank you” I whispered closing my eyes again, I was still thoroughly tired. “It’s okay” he replied caressing my face and laying me back down on a soft surface I didn’t realise was there.

The next time I woke up I noticed I was in a tent on a bed; it was really comfortable too.

I got up and decided to figure out where we were, I opened the tent door and screamed. I darted back to the bed and sat there frightened.

I hadn’t even realised to check if it was light outside, stupid I know. My right hand and arm were burned from my shoulder to my fingertips.

As I sat there I heard many laughs from outside, stupid wolves laughing at me.

“Kailli are you okay?” Kale came in looking worried, “I’m fine, don’t like the light is all” I replied and he smiled.

“Sun will set in a few hours then you’ll be able to come out” he said as he left the tent, I wonder if he would actually let me out? Wouldn’t he be scared I would run away?

So I was left in the tent for four hours to sit there and wait, I was a prisoner, this I knew all too well I just had to get used to it.

I noticed the walls of the tent get darker and darker until they were as dark as could be.

I peeked out of the door and saw that the sun’s rays had left, it was safe for me.

I stood at the door for a moment looking around for wolves but there were none, I decided I would go for a walk, stretch my legs.

I walked into the forest and around the perimeter of their camp, as I was walking I noticed a few deer drinking from a near by river.

As I watched them my mouth began to water, I let instinct take over and I stalked them with what strength and agility I had.

I managed to take one down and it taste so good I couldn’t believe it, I had always preyed on humans but animals weren’t all that bad.

Someone coughed behind me as I crouched over the deer drinking its blood, I turned around fangs bared and growled.

Kale was standing there looking thoroughly disgusted; I wiped my mouth and then stood up brushing myself off.

You couldn’t really tell I had just attached and killed an animal I was that good at it.

“I got hungry, it looked tasty” I defended myself for some unknown reason, I didn’t need to defend myself if they weren’t going to feed me properly I was going to find my own means.

Wonder how strong she is now?

Wonder when she’ll leave, I don’t know if I can trust her thought I do but she can’t want to stay with me.

Everyone else is afraid she’s going to kill us all in our sleep but I’m not.

They say love has made me blind, stupid even then again I don’t really care what they say.

I know they all think she’s beautiful and desirable, from a distance they add.

I sighed and then crossed the distance between us ignoring the burning in my nose and the hairs standing up all over my body.

“I’m not going to kill you all or run away, I made a promise and even if you or the others don’t trust that I don’t break my promises.” I told him as I hesitantly brought my hand up and placed it on his cheek.

The touch of his skin felt like I was burning, like this morning, burning from the sun but my skin was fine this time.

I kept my hand there no matter how much it hurt; I had to make this work if I was going to be with him for the rest of his life, hopefully werewolves aren’t immortal too.

“I trust you,” he whispered closing his eyes and leaning his head against my hand.

“You’re very cold” he commented after a while and it started to get awkward, “sorry” I pulled my hand away.

“No it’s fine” he smiled and then took my hand in his, the burning was there and I flinched for a second.

“How does this feel for you?” he looked curious, “It’s fine” I lied, “Really? Because even humans find us hot” he replied still with the curious look on his face.

I sighed “Actually it burns as much as the sun” I confessed and he let go instantly, “why didn’t you say so?” he looked hurt though he shouldn’t.

“I’m trying to make this work, I promised to stay with you for the rest of your life so I have to try” I felt defeated inside and out.

I had just feed though I felt as weak as before, I was refusing my natural instinct to kill him and instead trying to become friends and more with him, all for Donovan.

His name wouldn’t leave me, his face wouldn’t leave me, I kept seeing him looking angry when I told him I wasn’t going with him, I kept hearing his thoughts run through my head.

“Thank you Kailli, I know this must be hard but thank you. I don’t know how much you know about wolves but when this happens” he motioned between the two of us, “it’s for life, it’s a feeling that doesn’t go away ever, it doesn’t get weaker only stronger.”

He looked at me trying to assess my reaction “I love you more than life itself you have to know that, I would do absolutely anything for you.” He placed his hand on my fabric-covered shoulder trying not to hurt me.

I sighed, wolves have some of the most unorthodox instincts and customs.

“You have to understand that I have lived nearly a hundred years amongst my kind, listening to stories of your kind and how horrible and terrible you are. You also have to understand that I have instincts towards you that go against everything you feel.”

He flinched at this last statement I don’t think he knew that, “What do you mean by instincts exactly?” his voice was hesitant and reserved.

“You’re an animal” I explained and motioned to the dead deer by the riverside to try and prove my point, “Just more civil” I shrugged my shoulders as he looked on the deer in fear.

“I can control my instincts” I reassured him as he looked frightened and worried, then again that might make him want to let me go.

“We have stories about your kind too, monsters they said you were. Preying on humans in dark alleyways, beautiful and yet deadly. You seduced your prey before killing them and draining them of their blood, the most horrible thing someone could do.”

He sounded sad because he knew this was true, though he was trying to convince himself it wasn’t.

She would never kill a human, she’s too kind.

To take a human life is the worst of all the sins in the world, no she couldn’t and wouldn’t do that

His thoughts brought me back to the night I turned Donovan and killed his Lily.