Just to Hold You Close and Tight

I hadn’t been away from Ray for more than a few minutes in weeks. It was actually physically painful. I sat down on my bed with my homework spread around me, but I didn’t get much done.

I spent most of my time imagining where exactly Ray was, what he was doing, or what he was saying to Ben. I knew it wasn’t healthy at all. No one spent as much time with someone as I had with Ray for the past few weeks. Then again, our circumstances were quite different from anyone else’s.

I had gotten home at seven, done all the homework that was due the next day, and taken a shower. By that time it was ten, and Ray still hadn’t returned. I decided to get into bed, even though I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep.

I didn’t have to wait for too long. At 10:17 (but who’s counting?) he came through my wall, smiling at me. Then he frowned. “Were you waiting up for me?”

I shrugged. “I couldn’t sleep.”

“I’m really sorry,” he said. “It’s just-”

“It’s okay,” I interrupted. “I understand.”

He came to sit next to me on my bed. “I missed you, though. Every single second.”

“I know how you felt,” I replied. Without asking how his talk with Ben had gone, I pulled him down next to me (through the sheet, of course). Snuggling into him, I fell asleep.

When I woke up, I felt very rested. I had gone to bed fairly early. Ray was right where he had been when I fell asleep. I wondered how he could stand it to lay there for hours. “Don’t you ever get bored?” I asked.

He shook his head. “Nope. Never,” he said as I got up and started brushing my hair.

I realized something and smiled. “It’s Friday.”

“Yeah…” Ray said, not getting my point.

“I don’t have school tomorrow,” I explained. I get to sneak out. You won’t have to be bored tonight.”

“Like I said, I don’t get bored. I’m glad I don’t have to sleep. I’d much rather be awake. Still, it’s also fun when you sneak out.” He frowned. “I just hope your parents never catch you.”

“What’s the worst they could do?” I asked, laughing. “Ground me?”

Ray smiled. “I guess you’re right. It wouldn’t do much good, would it?”

I shook my head. “So how was your visit with Ben?” I asked cautiously.

“It went pretty well, actually,” he replied. “Once Ben knew you were just as jealous as he was, he wasn’t so bad.”

I groaned. “You told him I was jealous?”

“Sorry,” he said. “It was necessary. He said he’s try to start over today. I think you have history together… He also asked if we wanted to go eat dinner tonight.”

I frowned, thinking of how it would look to other people if I went out to dinner with Ben. I knew I couldn’t think of it like that, though. Ben and I would both know Ray was there. I sighed. “Fine.”

“There you go,” he said. “Second chances are good, right?”

“Sure,” I grumbled.

When I went down to breakfast, I realized I would have to tell my mom that I wouldn’t be home for dinner. “Er, Mom?” I said questioningly.

“Yes?”

“I’m, uh, going out to dinner with a new friend tonight,” I said. Ray smiled at me encouragingly.

“That’s great, sweety. Who is your friend?” she asked.

I gave ray a look that said “You owe me one” before saying to my mom, “Ben, this guy from my history class.”

“Hm,” my mom said. “Sounds like a date, not that I have a problem with that.”

“It’s not a date,” I snapped, clenching my teeth. “He’s just a friend.”

“Oh. Okay honey,” my mom replied.

“Sorry,” Ray muttered to me on the way to school. “I forgot it would look kind of like a date.”

“That’s okay,” I said. “It’s not your fault.”

School was very boring. Well, actually history wasn’t that bad. I sat next to Ben, and Ray stood in between us… a little closer to me. It was pretty funny to watch Ben try to convince Ray to help him cheat on the quiz. Ray wouldn’t budge on his “no cheating” policy.